Biggest lie on homebrew talk

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I always cringe when someone creates an account to seek advice because they've never brewed before and told their best friend that they're going to brew all the beer for their wedding


i did give someone a jug of white whiskey, and a bag of light toast oak for their son's birthday. told them to add the wood, and stash it to open on their 21st.
 
That's a pretty good one. I've been brewing for a few years with varying frequency and my beers can't hold a match to the pros. I think my Saison would hold up pretty well against any Saison at my local breweries but that's it. I've still got a LOT to learn

Exactly. I've been brewing since 2006, and I consider most of my beer to be on par with average craft beer quality around me, especially recipes I've made a few times and dialed in. Not better than craft beer, and not quite equal to the best breweries in the area. And certainly not as consistent.

I consider that a pretty solid achievement after doing this for over a decade. It took years, continual process improvements, etc to get there. I simply don't believe someone if they are new and think they've reached that point. That's "ugly baby syndrome".
 
We may be able to give you feedback on that...

Don't worry, we already had written off your beer, by your own words that is. :p


yeah well shipping on a batch of beer's worth of malt is pricey, not to mention the time involved making it. but it has been brewed with and fermenting by someone other then me, but it was oat malt. i've never brewed with 'store bought' oat malt. but they agreed it smelled awesome when it was boiling!

and i'm hoping we can put our heads together and put that into a glass!

(i think i'm a pretty good brewer, just as soon as the boil's over don't let me near it! r :D)
 
IMO, probably not a lie at all. Usually 1 homebrew is better than most commercial swill.
I agree that for just about everyone here, their very first brew was better than any BMC product out there. However, @bwarbiany specifically said CRAFT beer, which I agree with. I've been brewing for exactly six months. I can honestly state that my beer is not as good (or consistent) as the local craft brewers, but I'm learning and getting better every time I brew, and I love the satisfaction of knowing it's something I created from scratch.

Still, that first brew was WORLDS better than the only Budweiser I've ever tasted.
 
I donno... I've had some very bad craft beer. IMO, in this area, may happen all over as far as I know, I believe folks rushed into the "Hey, let's open a brewery and charge $$$ for our beer.". I realize it takes a LOT of capital expense to begin a brewery, to run a brewery, etc, but, once again, around here, we seem saturated, have more than a few "craft beer breweries" that are really bad and more seem to appear all the time. I guess breweries are the new solutions to economic problems (aka "fill the tax tills"). In the past it was outlet malls, lotteries, etc.
 
The biggest lies are most likely over in the debate forum, but since I'm not a supporter yet, I could be accused of lying about that, since I don't actually know that its true....
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IMO, probably not a lie at all. Usually 1 homebrew is better than most commercial swill.
I agree that for just about everyone here, their very first brew was better than any BMC product out there. However, @bwarbiany specifically said CRAFT beer, which I agree with. I've been brewing for exactly six months. I can honestly state that my beer is not as good (or consistent) as the local craft brewers, but I'm learning and getting better every time I brew, and I love the satisfaction of knowing it's something I created from scratch.

Still, that first brew was WORLDS better than the only Budweiser I've ever tasted.

Objectively false, friends. BMC can brew circles around each and every one of us, any day of the week.

On any objective measure of brewer's skill, BMC are some of the best breweries in the world.

Most homebrew is MUCH more flavorful than BMC, of course. Maybe it makes you happier than BMC. Maybe it's more satisfying to you than BMC. But you don't brew as well as BMC brewers.
 
Objectively false, friends. BMC can brew circles around each and every one of us, any day of the week.

On any objective measure of brewer's skill, BMC are some of the best breweries in the world.

Most homebrew is MUCH more flavorful than BMC, of course. Maybe it makes you happier than BMC. Maybe it's more satisfying to you than BMC. But you don't brew as well as BMC brewers.
But I don't objectively judge beer, and neither does anyone else. We subjectively judge how much we like the beer.

Do you take a sip of beer and think: "Man, that's a skilled brewer!" Or, do you think: "Man, that's a tasty brew!"
 
But I don't objectively judge beer, and neither does anyone else. We subjectively judge how much we like the beer.

Do you take a sip of beer and think: "Man, that's a skilled brewer!" Or, do you think: "Man, that's a tasty brew!"

I've had beers that I don't like at all but I can tell and respect that they're objectively well-made.

While American light lagers are little more than hydration devices to me, I think Coors Banquet and MGD are actually pretty tasty brews. They're not exciting, and I will usually choose something else more in my style preference when the choices exist, but I'd rather have a Coors Banquet than a mediocre craft IPA. The good thing is that there is so much GOOD craft beer available that I don't have to make that choice.
 
I agree with @bwarbiany on this point. I appreciate quality and without the skill level the BMC brewers possess their level of consistency is impossible. Do I like their beers? Not really, but no matter where in the country I am it's the same exact beer. MGD and Coors Banquet (Yellow jackets) are actually pretty good, though. If the BMC brewers decided one day they were going to produce an IPA, Stout, Quad, ::insert literally any beer style here:: it would be better than anything we can produce on our equipment.

Yellow Jackets have a special place in my heart. When I go camping I don't tote a keg with me (usually lol) or drop $100 on craft cans. I buy a few cases of Coors Banquet and love life. (I like MGD better but I'm allergic to something they use. 3 or 4 beers in my eyes are watering, nose is gushing and I can't stop sneezing)

To me the fact that people can't even give BMC a compliment or admit that MGD or Banquet are actually pretty good is proof positive that they are judged objectively, and not subjectively.
 
If the BMC brewers decided one day they were going to produce an IPA, Stout, Quad, ::insert literally any beer style here:


you're behind the times. next 'craft' beer you buy, double check who the parent company is! i bought a 'Arizona' IPA while back, and it's InBev.

edit: and honestly, it tasted like hop water. strangely no malt flavor at all. i would have to give MGD credit for that! i don't know if it's malt flavor, but it has flavor of some sort! and it's pretty good....
 
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you're behind the times. next 'craft' beer you buy, double check who the parent company is! i bought a 'Arizona' IPA while back, and it's InBev.

There are a LOT of craft breweries owned by InBev but are brewed at the original craft brewery by the original brewer. They're not brewed at the InBev factory. Aside from ownership they're two completely different companies. InBev was buying up any brewery they could when they thought craft was going to take them down. They didn't want their process to change, they just wanted the revenue
 
I don't intend on this thread to be angry but rather a place to poke fun at ourselves.

After reading several threads both live and dead, old and new I kept on seeing the same bold face lie told over and over again... It looks something like this:

I just bottled/kegged XYZ beer with (the exact ingredient you are researching) I'll post back when I get a chance to taste it in a couple weeks.

How many of my brewing brothers and sisters have had their hopes dashed against the rocks while watching that poster disappear from that thread entirely?

Blessed are the few who return and actually report back. Narrow is that way and there are a few who find it....

What other quirks have you encountered here that bother you?

Do you remember every post that you replied to? Do you remember which you said you would get back to? Could you find it if you did?
For me this one doesn't even register.
 
If the BMC brewers decided one day they were going to produce an IPA, Stout, Quad, ::insert literally any beer style here:: it would be better than anything we can produce on our equipment.

I agree that they "can", but I don't think their corporate cultures would ever really fit with it. I worry that they'd test the beer in front of a bunch of focus groups and tasting panels to make sure it will be a commercial success, and end up rounding all the sharp corners that appeal to craft beer drinkers (many of whom, this thread shows, will snub it simply because it's BMC). I worry that approach would end up with something too aggressive for typical BMC drinkers and too toned down for typical craft drinkers.

It's what happened with Budweiser American Ale, in my opinion.
 
I agree that they "can", but I don't think their corporate cultures would ever really fit with it. I worry that they'd test the beer in front of a bunch of focus groups and tasting panels to make sure it will be a commercial success, and end up rounding all the sharp corners that appeal to craft beer drinkers (many of whom, this thread shows, will snub it simply because it's BMC). I worry that approach would end up with something too aggressive for typical BMC drinkers and too toned down for typical craft drinkers.

It's what happened with Budweiser American Ale, in my opinion.

that's a very valid point. On their scale their goal is to appeal to the masses, so I think you're exactly right. I can just imagine that panel now..

'This is the pilot batch of a NEIPA, let me know what you think'

Taster 1: Hmm..interesting, but much too hoppy. Let's dial that back.
Taster 2: Yea I agree, too hoppy. And I can't see through it. Should we do something to clean it up?
Taster 3: This is garbage, did we use an Ale yeast in this?!

'After taking all your thoughts into consideration, this is batch two. Basically just a Hoppy American Lager'
 
Do you remember every post that you replied to? Do you remember which you said you would get back to? Could you find it if you did?
For me this one doesn't even register.

Huh? There's something called notifications... So yeah I'm pretty sure I get back to my threads. That's just me tho....
 
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if you're not going to fact check me, absolutely!
'

Just saying that most will post things and say they will report back. Later when the beer is done they have forgotten which posts they said they would get back to. And even if they remembered that they said they would report back they might have trouble finding which thread it was.
 
What other quirks have you encountered here that bother you?
Folks whos use acronyms without spelling them out on the first usage! For example in this thread the acronym BMC is used fifteen times. BudweiserMilllerCoors is my guess from context.

It does seem to me that some first time posts indicate a startling level of naivete about brewing. That does not bother me. Puzzles might be a better word ... I have a feeling that my comment about BMC might be an an example of the same kind of naivete on my part.
 
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i did give someone a jug of white whiskey, and a bag of light toast oak for their son's birthday. told them to add the wood, and stash it to open on their 21st.
But the beer turned out really nice. I’m still trying to chase that dragon wedding batch, years later
 
"It arrived damaged."
"Sure. Keep the bottle. No problem."
"It'll improve with age."
 
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When I'm looking up cooking recipes and I click on whatever dish interests me with 1,000, 5 star reviews, and 900 of those reviews are people saying 'this looks AMAZING, can't wait to try it!' or something equally useless.
Related to that is when someone rates a recipe on allrecipes.com after they have changed four things and it's no longer the recipe being rated--AHHHHHHH! Of a grilled cheese, someone will say, "Well, I didn't have that type of cheese in the house or bread or butter that the recipe calls for so I used olive oil (which is healthier than butter), some American cheese (my hubby LOVES American cheese) and flour tortillas.
They're all fine people who do this, I'm sure, but it still kills me. As a result, I will never post a single recipe on any of those types of sites.
 
Asking a question here in the HBT forums, waiting all day for a response, and then having someone finally answer with "There's already a thread that answers this question",
Also with that, there would be near zero traffic on here. There aren't that many new things that haven't already been discussed. Sometimes a referral is good but mostly just re-answer a question. I've seen so many "bottling vs kegging" it's not funny but I always dive in for fun.
 
There aren't that many new things that haven't already been discussed. Sometimes a referral is good but mostly just re-answer a question.
there are already several threads about this. please memorize the internet in it's entirety before asking a question on a forum.
 
One thing I will point out is that the BMC brewers are 1) brewing on a massively bigger scale than your average homebrewer; 2) they have consistency on their side (bazillions of batches where most of us brew maybe 20 times a year [unless we're @bracconiere]) and the $$$ to do it; and 3) monstrous customer base. Here I am thinking of their "flagship" beers, i.e. Coors Banquet, MGD, Bud, BL, CL, and the like. I think in four years of homebrewing the longest streak I've had of "drinkable" beers (yes I do make mistakes, and a lot of them) has been five. These guys have to brew consistently every damn time. Where a mistake for us homebrewers might mean 5-10 (or slightly more) gallons going down the drain, if THEY screw up we're talking thousands of gallons.

I will also agree with whoever up above (I've been drinking, I'm tired, and too lazy to go look) that said MGD causes some sort of allergic reaction when they drink it; I get the same thing. Also with cheap vodka.

Anyway. Back to the original topic (what was it again?). "So many people in my family love my beer, I'm going to start my own commercial brewery! How do I do that?"
 
to get back on topic the biggest lie on HBT, @seatazzz , "i only brewed one batch of Mr. Beer when i was a teenager, and haven't had a drop since!" 😛


now off to how many gallons, to lie and brag about my 92% effec. with 2.5lb's of white flour.... ;)
 
to get back on topic the biggest lie on HBT, @seatazzz , "i only brewed one batch of Mr. Beer when i was a teenager, and haven't had a drop since!" 😛


now off to how many gallons, to lie and brag about my 92% effec. with 2.5lb's of white flour.... ;)
that's a little low. i can get 95% efficiency when i make my pizzas
 
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