a REAL homebrewer...

[Ivan Lendl]

poll time poll time

 

[Axegod]

What about table sugar??

 

[Orpheus]

I vote table sugar too!

This poll is rigged I tells ya!:rockin: Rock the vote!

 

[Axegod]

Is Fleischman's bread yeast under the "dry yeast" selection?

 

[Ivan Lendl]

sorry 10 is the max options. I had to cut many choices including table sugar, h20 in airlocks, tap water, bottled water, well water, city water, melted snow water (remember that guy?), dishwasher as bottle sanitizer, twist off caps, and a million more!

 

[pbowler]

ahhh, I have H20 in my airlock....

 

[Ivan Lendl]

ahhh, I have H20 in my airlock....

So do I! (I never said I was a real homebrewer)

I should have added a disclaimer to the poll that reads:
a 'Real Homebrewer' is a euphamism for Paranoid Schizophrenic

 

[Brewsmith]

I voted because of the hilarity that ensued from our now banned marine friend when he said that real homebrewers don't use bleach. My other choice was going to be Ralph Nader

 

[Chairman Cheyco]

Ralph Nader, anyone who makes great beer has nothing to do with him.*



*until the poll is "You're only a REAL homebrewer if you use:"

 

[Monk]

Freakin Ralph Nader.

You're a real homebrewer if what you brewed gets you intoxicated, in my book. Maybe you're not a real GOOD homebrewer, but you're a real homebrewer. That was my criterion on my first brew. I drank it. I felt buzzed. I declared, "It tastes mediocre, BUT IT WORKS!"

monk

 

[Evan!]

hydrometers: Never used one, because I don't yet have a graduated cylinder, so I'd risk losing about a half gallon of wort/beer trying to measure in a big container. Yet, all my beers have turned out just fine. Menh.

bleach: I'd say that if you use bleach, you're a rugged bastard anyway. When I run out of Star San, well, what else am I gonna do? And you can't beat the price, it just takes a little more time and effort. Again, Menh.

aluminum: As long as it has an oxide coating, menh.

mouth for siphon: This isn't so much a measure of a good/bad homebrewer as it is a measure of a simple *******.

dry yeast: I started brewing in July, and I've used two liquid yeasts from a "local" HBS (1.5 hrs away). Neither worked. I've subsequently used dry on all of my beers (12 total), and I've had great results. In the summer, I'll be damned if I'm going to trust an ice pack to last in a UPS truck from Austin to Virginia. Once it gets cold, then I'll switch. Menh.

green bottles: As long as you keep them out of the sunlight, it's no prob.

plastic fermenters: great for primary, and bottling. Glass is best for secondary.

extract: Please. Partial mash is excellent. You get the benefits of grain without having to put together a freakin all-grain setup.

hop bags: Never used them, but I will say this: the hop pellet selection at AHS is much better than the whole leaf selection; problem is, hop pellets make straining the wort a HUGE pain in the ass. So, I will confess that I've thought about it...

Ralph Nader: Regardless of whether you homebrew, if you associate yourself whatsoever with this fool, then you have no place in civilized society.


In other words, your poll sayeth very little about "real homebrewers". But interesting nonetheless.

 

[Bernie Brewer]

I'm not lookin' down on anyone who has been guilty of any of these, 'cept fo rthe Nader thing. I personally hve committed all of these "sins" at one time or another except for the aluminum, and if anyone thinks I'm less of a homebrewer because of it then f**k you and the horse you rode in on.:rockin:

 

[SteveM]

I like to humbly think of myself as a home brewer, so I went with Ralph Nader also. I could have had at least three different ways to disqualify myself otherwise.

 

[Treekiller]

I went Ralph Nader because I did not see "the wife's used pantyhose" for grain bag option. Well I guess that could have been a hop bag as well, LOL.
Ralph Nader What an... starts with an a and has a whole on the end

 

[Walker]

I voted for Nader, so piss on all of you.

 

[pbowler]

not crazy about Nader, but look who we have as president.

ANYWAY... pantyhose huh?...

not a bad idea...

 

[nosnhojr]

Damn. I've never voted for any politician who's won, but maybe Nader has a shot here!

I say you're a real homebrewer as soon as you have the pipeline full, so that you're drinking your own brew while you make the next batch!

 

[The Happy Mug]

That's funny, crappy old fish tank water isn't on the list. Oh, wait, I missed it. It's at the bottom.

 

[Passload]

"The use of solar energy has not been opened up because the oil industry does not own the sun."

True so true

 

[AleJoe]

people strain the hops out of the beer?




hmmmm

 

[G. Cretin]

True so true

INDEED! I'm not a fan of hydrocarbons exept ETOH.

 

[loopmd]

I voted for Nader. So stop being a d1ck and saying things like "you're not a real homebrewer....."

Sorry, flashback.

Semper Fi!!!

Loop

 

[marshman]

Sorry, newb here. Are we talking about Ralph Nader, the guy who ran against Bush and Kerry for President of the United States of America last time out, or was there a member here that used to go buy that name?

 

[the_bird]

It was determined long ago - by who, I'm not sure - that all polls needed to include "Ralph Nader" as an option. The gent to whom they refer (who was also before my time) went by the moniker USMCCRUZ or something like that (he was a Marine). As far as I can tell, Ralph Nader has never frequented this forum

 

[pariah]

What's wrong with a mouth siphon? I do it sometimes when my water tube fails, and I've never had a problem. Maybe my mouth just doesn't harbor bacteria...or the shot of vodka I take before it each time.

 

[EdWort]

Plastic Fermenters? That's all I use. I ferment beer in plastic primary bucket, then rack to a plastic Better Bottle. The system ROCKS and when the PLASTIC carboy slipped when cleaning it, it didn't explode into a thousand razor shards.

Bucket Primary with a spigot to rack to a Better Bottle. Sweet System!

 

[Willie3]

You're not a real homebrewer if you use the advice off this site...

You're not a real homebrewer if you post questions to this site...

By the way what is the definition of a "real homebrewer" anyways?

Why does society always have to become racial? Why can't we just be brewers?

- WW

 

[Cheesefood]

Why does society always have to become racial? Why can't we just be brewers?

- WW

Brewers suck. Go Cubs!

 

[Yuri_Rage]

How about: You ARE a real homebrewer if the end result of your recipe is beer.

 

[loopmd]

Settle down everyone, it's a very sarcastic poll that those of us who have been around for over a year can relate to. It is a deep, deep dark secret the brethren share and maybe some day Txbrew will open up the vault for all to see.



Loop

btw, Cheesfood, Cubs suck too.