21st Birthday Brew

[GreggZ]

Go ahead....may you should add some ashes of a dead relative?

Thats a good idea. You can call it craddle to grave barleywine. Or you can just give it a non discriptive name and let him drink one. Then watch your nephew go threw a nervous break down after you inform him of the ingredients.

 

[makomachine]

I can see it now.

<cell mate> So how'd you end up here?

<birthday boy> It's all tied to drinking really... I killed a man after one too many beers.

<cell mate> Heard this one a 100 times...

<birthday boy> I'm guessing you haven't....

 

[mcwilcr]

Hmmm....in the last few weeks, a guy that wants to brew with placenta, a guy that wants to brew with vaginal yeast, and a guy that wants to brew with his dead wife's ashes. Here's the ultimate recipe:

1) Put placenta in grain bag, steep at 162 for 60 minutes or until it smells like bacon
2) Chill to 80 degrees F in a bathtub full of baby penguins
3) Be sure you make a vaginal yeast starter a few days prior to brew day. The best method is a one night stand in an unsanitary hot tub.
4) Pitch vaginal yeast STRAIGHT out of the vagina for peak "freshness"
5) Ferment for 2 weeks in the primary. Note that the vaginal yeast WILL try to climb out of the carboy hole. It's what they do.
6) Put the ashes of your dead relative, along with optional fresh fruit, in the secondary and rack the vaginal placenta slurry directly on top.
7) After 2 more weeks in secondary, rack to keg, force carb at 12 PSI for 10 days, chill to 34 degrees, and pour yourself a Dead Guy's Vag Placenta Ale.

Congratulations, you have obtained enlightenment!

Hahaha... Ashy vag postpartum ale could be another good name for your recipe. :rockin:

 

[JonM]

If you gave me a beer with placenta in it without telling me I would kick you in the nuts.

This!
Seriously - are you saying nephew's born, brew with the placenta from his birth, then age the beer for 21 years? What newly 21-year-old guy wants to be forced to think about his mother's vag while he's hanging out with the guys having one of his first legal beers?

 

[doodlebug]

Probably the worst idea I've ever heard!

 

[EarthBound]

Hmmm....in the last few weeks, a guy that wants to brew with placenta, a guy that wants to brew with vaginal yeast, and a guy that wants to brew with his dead wife's ashes. Here's the ultimate recipe:

1) Put placenta in grain bag, steep at 162 for 60 minutes or until it smells like bacon
2) Chill to 80 degrees F in a bathtub full of baby penguins
3) Be sure you make a vaginal yeast starter a few days prior to brew day. The best method is a one night stand in an unsanitary hot tub.
4) Pitch vaginal yeast STRAIGHT out of the vagina for peak "freshness"
5) Ferment for 2 weeks in the primary. Note that the vaginal yeast WILL try to climb out of the carboy hole. It's what they do.
6) Put the ashes of your dead relative, along with optional fresh fruit, in the secondary and rack the vaginal placenta slurry directly on top.
7) After 2 more weeks in secondary, rack to keg, force carb at 12 PSI for 10 days, chill to 34 degrees, and pour yourself a Dead Guy's Vag Placenta Ale.

Congratulations, you have obtained enlightenment!

lmao!

 

[dwarven_stout]

This!
Seriously - are you saying nephew's born, brew with the placenta from his birth, then age the beer for 21 years? What newly 21-year-old guy wants to be forced to think about his mother's vag while he's hanging out with the guys having one of his first legal beers?

Hey, if it was good enough to feed him for 9 months, it's good enough for at least one more night.

 

[Shooter]

Hmmm....in the last few weeks, a guy that wants to brew with placenta, a guy that wants to brew with vaginal yeast, and a guy that wants to brew with his dead wife's ashes. Here's the ultimate recipe:

1) Put placenta in grain bag, steep at 162 for 60 minutes or until it smells like bacon
2) Chill to 80 degrees F in a bathtub full of baby penguins
3) Be sure you make a vaginal yeast starter a few days prior to brew day. The best method is a one night stand in an unsanitary hot tub.
4) Pitch vaginal yeast STRAIGHT out of the vagina for peak "freshness"
5) Ferment for 2 weeks in the primary. Note that the vaginal yeast WILL try to climb out of the carboy hole. It's what they do.
6) Put the ashes of your dead relative, along with optional fresh fruit, in the secondary and rack the vaginal placenta slurry directly on top.
7) After 2 more weeks in secondary, rack to keg, force carb at 12 PSI for 10 days, chill to 34 degrees, and pour yourself a Dead Guy's Vag Placenta Ale.

8)Drink
9)Vomit in mouth!
10)Vomit on floor!
11)Vomit on wife!
12)......and it pretty much goes on like that to step 16 where you actually get to vomit into the toilet.

17)Swear off beer forever.

 

[kegtapper]

Good god, I don't know why I keep reading these types of threads

 

[JonM]

Hey, if it was good enough to feed him for 9 months, it's good enough for at least one more night.

Not sure if trolling or crazy ...

 

[DannPM]

Hmmm....in the last few weeks, a guy that wants to brew with placenta, a guy that wants to brew with vaginal yeast, and a guy that wants to brew with his dead wife's ashes. Here's the ultimate recipe:

1) Put placenta in grain bag, steep at 162 for 60 minutes or until it smells like bacon
2) Chill to 80 degrees F in a bathtub full of baby penguins
3) Be sure you make a vaginal yeast starter a few days prior to brew day. The best method is a one night stand in an unsanitary hot tub.
4) Pitch vaginal yeast STRAIGHT out of the vagina for peak "freshness"
5) Ferment for 2 weeks in the primary. Note that the vaginal yeast WILL try to climb out of the carboy hole. It's what they do.
6) Put the ashes of your dead relative, along with optional fresh fruit, in the secondary and rack the vaginal placenta slurry directly on top.
7) After 2 more weeks in secondary, rack to keg, force carb at 12 PSI for 10 days, chill to 34 degrees, and pour yourself a Dead Guy's Vag Placenta Ale.

Congratulations, you have obtained enlightenment!

HAHAHA! LMFAO! Best post EVER!

 

[FlatcapBrew]

this is pretty messed up and im pretty sure you will end up kicked right in the dick, but I am curious as to how one goes about asking the mother for the placenta in order to make beer. is she cool with this? Have you asked yet? and +1 to telling the kid if you do go through with this

 

[scrambledegg81]

Congratulations. You have actually come up with an idea for beer more disgusting than this one.

Jesus-freaking-Christ...

 

[doodlebug]

Good god, I don't know why I keep reading these types of threads

AHhahahahahahaa RIGHT??!

 

[Navy_Chief]

Pardon me while I go vomit...














this is very close to the worst beer related idea ever....

 

[dwarven_stout]

this is pretty messed up and im pretty sure you will end up kicked right in the dick, but I am curious as to how one goes about asking the mother for the placenta in order to make beer. is she cool with this? Have you asked yet? and +1 to telling the kid if you do go through with this

She's cool with it. If I brew a beer like this, I'd only be using the part of the placenta that she doesn't turn into smoothies or whatever. Part of the batch would be going to her, and part would be aged.

 

[dwarven_stout]

Well, the kid's born, and I chickened out and didn't do it. Maybe on the next one?