Beer question for you experts!

[Eric1066]

Hi All,

I have made a few batches of homebrew (super noob) over the years and I have a question that I believe you guys are the people in the know.

I hate beer.

Bare with me!

The reason I made home brew it's because I don't like beer, it's far too bitter for me, and I wanted to see if I could make a beer that was palatable to me but being a complete novice I did silly things which I now know were silly, by adding loads more sugar trying to make it sweet and only to find out it just made it stronger. I adjusted the ratios of my ingredients and made even more disgusting drinks.

But...

I learned a lot. So I know I'm in the right place.

I hate being with friends and they're all drinking beer and I'm drinking a spirit cocktail.

What would you guys recommend for me to make a beer-like drink (4%) without any bittering agents, and I know people would say that would be sweet, but to my taste it will still not be sweet enough lol. Maybe even a suggestion of how I could make it sweeter if I found that the recommendation still isn't sweet enough for me.

I know I can make a fruit cider... (and I have) but that just gets the piss taken out of me lol. No, I want beer ingredients, resulting in a 4% roughly, but sweeeeet, non bitter drink.

How would you go about doing this, as an experiment?

Thank you!
Eric

Just realised that this could be a US based forum, so, 'take the piss' is like 'busting my balls' in US parlance.

 

[eric19312]

I can think of some different angles on this but have a couple questions.

Is there any beer style that you enjoy? And if not how many different styles have you tried? And over what period of time?

Bitter is kind of an acquired taste and I can't tell from your story above if you are 20 or 40. If you are 20 I'd guess you will probably start to like a little bitterness and maybe could just make a low IBU style and cut back on the hops. On other hand if you are 40 and just can't stand anything bitter would probably go in a somewhat different direction.

 

[eric19312]

Here is a style chart for IBUs. The lower the IBUs the less bitter.

https://www.brewersfriend.com/2017/05/07/beer-styles-ibu-chart-2017-update/

I'm thinking an American Cream Ale would be a good place to start.

 

[Tobor_8thMan]

Make a cream ale, a blonde ale, wheat beer, hefeweizen. Basically any low hopped brew.

 

[secretlevel]

Have you tried any pastry stouts? They're essentially desert in a glass with various adjuncts like coconut. Most of the times they have very little hop additions and lots of milk sugar. I'd recommend buying some from the store to see if you like them, then giving Deception Stout a shot from the Ale Recipes forum!

 

[gunhaus]

I brewed The Centennial Blonde Ale, for a friend with a similar situation. Just limited hops to a single 60 minute addition for a bit under 10 ibu. It turned out just like she was looking for. Sweet, lacking perceived bitterness, but still balanced enough to be drinkable.

https://www.homebrewtalk.com/showthread.php?t=42841

 

[Rob2010SS]

I'm with @eric19312 on this one. How old are you? When I turned 21, I was in the same spot. I hated beer. I tried to like it but they all tasted the same to me. Then once I got turned onto REAL craft beer. it was like a light switch flipped for me.

Anyway, what styles have you drank? Have you tried stouts? You can make a nice milk stout and have it not bitter at all, especially if you tone back the hops and the roasted grains.

I have a brown ale on tap right now that is not bitter at all. It's very malty and nutty with little to no hop presence. It's super easy drinking.

 

[smcinco]

I second @secretlevel. It sounds counterintuitive, but making a higher ABV beer is a good way to mask the bitterness. Even huge IPAs have much lower perceived bitterness with IBUs that are off the chart. Most good cocktails have a bitter component too, you just sip em.

 

[Eric1066]

I can think of some different angles on this but have a couple questions.

Is there any beer style that you enjoy? And if not how many different styles have you tried? And over what period of time?

Bitter is kind of an acquired taste and I can't tell from your story above if you are 20 or 40. If you are 20 I'd guess you will probably start to like a little bitterness and maybe could just make a low IBU style and cut back on the hops. On other hand if you are 40 and just can't stand anything bitter would probably go in a somewhat different direction.

I'm 47.
I have no idea about styles, as I'm not a beer drinker. What I would do is buy different ones over the years, take a sip and spit it out.

 

[McKnuckle]

I hate being with friends and they're all drinking beer and I'm drinking a spirit cocktail.

Sounds like you simply don't like beer, pretty much uncategorically. If you're a middle aged person, why do you care about doing something different than your friends if you enjoy your choices better?

I'm 53 and recently turned vegan. I don't relish being the weird one hunting for decent options at a restaurant while my friends or family are devouring the meaty treats I used to consume. But I'm long past caring about peer pressure.

Ironically, the cheap American mass produced beers are very lightly hopped and hence not bitter within the range of beer styles. If you find them undrinkable too, it's not likely you will find a palatable option.

 

[mattdee1]

I think you may just have to face it, you're a Smirnoff Ice guy.

You have my condolences.

 

[jtrux]

Find a recipe you think you can tolerate and add extra DME but keep the hops the same. It will add more sweetness and more ABV without having the extra hops to balance it, the perceived sweetness will be higher. You can also try adding non-fermentable sugars to up the sweetness (lactose is one I think). Also like stated earlier try lots of styles to find the one you tolerate the best and craft from there. Many stores offer the “build your 6 pack” option. With that you could by a 6 pack with all different beers and styles. Good luck. And yes like you stated table sugar is 100% fermentable so it will not add any sweetness just alcohol. DME is about 70% fermentable so it will leave some sweetness behind. Also adding all the DME at the beginning of the boil makes it a little less fermentable vs adding it later,

 

[Eric1066]

Thanks all for your replies guys!

Interesting point about the IPA's as I do find them better yet the IBU's seem huge on that chart.

 

[hjblwme]

Like others have said try a few different styles. If you are a coffee or chocolate person I would suggest stouts. If you are a bourbon drinker I would suggest some of the bourbon stouts. If you have a brewery or beer shop around that brews onsite go spend a little time there and tell them what you don’t like. They will help and let you try a few without a problem.

I recently made a stout that SWMBO loves. She is NOT a fan of hops.

 

[Dave Sarber]

I'm kinda similar, don't like bitter beers, but also don't like sweet beers. So, I brew mildly hopped beers, and add a 1/4 tsp of gluco-amylase to completely ferment the sugar. Makes it very dry, higher alcohol, but still not bitter. (Note, the higher alcohol will make it seem more bitter, so you may want to back off even more on the hops).
If you like sweet beers, use lactose (milk sugar) to sweeten it, as it's unfermentable.

 

[NickTheGreat]

Thanks all for your replies guys!

Interesting point about the IPA's as I do find them better yet the IBU's seem huge on that chart.

That's a weird thing. Bitterness comes from hops, and IPA's are generally going to be "hoppy-er." IBU is a number that kinda measures how bitter a beer is.

So are you saying you like IPA's more than a Bud Light? If that's the case, I don't think it's the bitterness you don't like?

 

[dmtaylor]

What would you guys recommend for me to make a beer-like drink (4%) without any bittering agents, and I know people would say that would be sweet, but to my taste it will still not be sweet enough lol. Maybe even a suggestion of how I could make it sweeter if I found that the recommendation still isn't sweet enough for me.

How would you go about doing this, as an experiment?

I think you might enjoy a lot of low bitterness beers like hefeweizen and Scottish ales. And maybe American Light. Otherwise there's always gruit ale, flavored with various herbs instead of hops, and when done well they are very yummy!

 

[ultra_cas]

Make a Belgian trippel but cut back on the hops.

 

[MentalThinking]

I was definitely in the 'beer is gross' category for many years - it wasn't until I tried some darker beers at a friend's wedding that I even realized that there were flavour profiles to be had - I sort of assumed all beer was the mass market pale yellow stuff.

There are so many styles of beer out there that taste like so much more than their component parts. I'm definitely a malt guy - I go for bready/nutty/biscuit flavours firstly, and look for coffee/chocolate/toffee/caramel notes in things. I dislike floral notes or flavours in even the slightest amounts, and the only thing I like less is any sort of vegetal leaning.

What I'm saying is that there might be a style for you out there that ticks your boxes. I used to 'hate beer' too - until I realized that comparing some styles of beer is about as accurate as comparing housecats and tigers. There are definitely similarities, sure, but it's easy to see why one is allowed in my living room but not the other.

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Thanks all for your replies guys!

Interesting point about the IPA's as I do find them better yet the IBU's seem huge on that chart.

Seems pretty unusual for someone that doesn’t like beer to start brewing, yet an interesting approach.

May I suggest you visit a couple craft breweries and sample New England IPA (NEIPIA) and look for “milkshake” ipa, in darker beers the pastry stout and milk stout are sweet.
When you find a style that you can drink, even if you find it a little bitter, when you find a recipe you can reduce the bittering hops. Also, do small batches until you find what you like. Perhaps you find commercial beer you can drink. Try the McEwans not the Bastard, it is smooth and not bitter, yet not horridly sweet, like a milkshake IPA.

 

[OnePlate]

I'm in a similar boat as the OP, not really liking most commercial beers but LOVING my own. Usually I brew citrusy wheat beers with kolsch yeast or just a straight up low-hopped kolsch. Kolsch yeast can be a little vinous (grape-like) which can be pleasant. Very drinkable at 4%.

Have you ever tried a sour ale? It might be a revelation for you, as it was for me. Berliner Weisse beers are low to no hops at all and can be sweetened with a flavored syrup (usually raspberry syrup or woodruff) when poured. VERY easy to brew.

Lambic beers are also excellent and fruity/tart but beyond your brewing capability. Still good to buy once in a while at the store just to drink.

 

[wepeeler]

I second @OnePlate. I make a 5% Kolsch with all Pilsner malt, Imperial Kolsch yeast and Hallertau Mittelfrüh hops. Floral, super light, super crisp, with very little bitterness. If you can't get into a beer like that, then you just don't like beer. Nothing wrong with that, some people just don't like beer.

 

[Tobor_8thMan]

Thanks all for your replies guys!

Interesting point about the IPA's as I do find them better yet the IBU's seem huge on that chart.

You do realize IPA = hoppy beer = higher IBUs.

 

[eric19312]

I'm 47.
I have no idea about styles, as I'm not a beer drinker. What I would do is buy different ones over the years, take a sip and spit it out.

Ok that answers it. You don’t like beer. However you do apparently like other adult beverages. If you want to brew...as in get some malted barley, grind it up, mash it, lauter it, boil that wort and then ferment it....There is one more hobbyable step that we must not ever talk about here on homebrewtalk that might get you to something you would enjoy drinking.

 

[Tobor_8thMan]

My best recommendation? Learn about beer styles. Read, read, read. Decide what is liked/enjoyed. Then, and only then, post a question otherwise you are a blind person walking in a dark room. No offense, but without knowing the styles, making a blanket assertion and then asking for help, is, basically, wasting people's time.

 

[Rob2010SS]

Ok that answers it. You don’t like beer. However you do apparently like other adult beverages. If you want to brew...as in get some malted barley, grind it up, mash it, lauter it, boil that wort and then ferment it....There is one more hobbyable step that we must not ever talk about here on homebrewtalk that might get you to something you would enjoy drinking.

Hmmm what am I missing and why can't we discuss it? Or was that a joke because it regards making a beverage that's NOT beer?

 

[kevin58]

Not all beer is bitter. If you go to a pub or brewery that offers flights ask the server which beers are not bitter and try several of those. By homebrewing you can definitely control the level of bitterness allowing you to brew only those beers that are balanced or malt forward. Some styles you might want to try are British Mild, Porter or Stout, American Ale, Cream Ale, and some Pale Ales.