I hate bottling.

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HokieBrewer

HokieBrewer

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Hate it hate it hate it. Takes forever. Last night I broke a bottle with my wingcapper and spilled beer and shards of glass everywhere. Carbonation never seems right. Tasted the last drops of beer out of my bottling bucket and it was like syrup. Guess the priming sugar didn't distribute all the way. Awesome.

Maybe if I leave bottles everywhere I can convince SWMBO we need a kegerator.

[/rant]
 
Well, you could wimp out and decide to keg. :D Or you could MASTER bottling, rather than letting it defeat you. You could beat the process into submission until you can bottle like many of us do, comfortably and in under an hour for a five gallon batch.

You just need to pimp your process.....we tweak all other aspects of the brewing process to what works best for us, but most brewers bottle EXACTLY the way that pappa charlie and John Palmer show in their books...never ever thinking of trying other ways...and then cursing and complaining about how hard it is to bottle.

Some of us have figured out how to make it no more onorous a chore than cleaning. It takes me less than an hour to comfortably bottle 54 beers. AND I get two cases + 1 sixer on average/ 5 gallon batch of beer.

We explain all in here. https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f35/revvys-tips-bottler-first-time-otherwise-94812/

I think folks that don't master something and then b1tch about it are wussies...so I dare you to be a Jedi of Bottling.

:D
 
Life is short. What is the point of doing this hobby - to be a master of skillfully transferring liquid into glass bottles, or making great tasting beer?

If having your beer in bottles is crucial to your enjoyment of the hobby, then dial in the process and suffer through it until it's easy.

Otherwise, **** all that bottling ****.
 
I've read it many times Rev. The vinator would definitely shave some time off. But I think I fall into Burg's camp. The astronaut cat camp.
 
I solo-bottled 18 gallons into a combination of 22 oz and 12 oz bottles in well under 2 hours earlier this week. Floor corker with the capper attachment speeds things up and so does using pressure to push the beer, IMO.

Edit. Never seen Revvy's bottling thread, but I like some of the ideas in there as well.
 
anything i want to bottle now i just use a keg, picnic tap, and a piece of racking cane. goes so much faster. bottled in under an hour last night.
 
Jedi of Bottling? Hokey religions and ancient bottles are no match for a good beer tap at your side, kid. Get some kegs and a nice kegerator to put them in. At worst case, a second fridge plus a cobra tap would do.
 
I just rack my carboy in a keg and set in the keezer, takes me about 5 mins.

No but all seriousness hobbies shouldnt stress you out hell it should be a stress reliever, just make zen with the bottling and accept it takes some devoted time or invest in keg set up. My first keg and keezer set me back about $250 then $20-30 for every additional keg.
 
hal2814 said:
Jedi of Bottling? Hokey religions and ancient bottles are no match for a good beer tap at your side, kid.
Click to expand...

win :D

star-wars-episode-iv-a-new-hope-limited-edition-20060718075742672-000.jpg
 
When I started brewing, bottling was my least favorite part of the process. However, when I examined the alternatives, I decided that I was either going to come to terms with bottling or hang it up. I did several things already discussed in this thread:

1. Switched from that wing capper to Grandpa's old bench capper. Much easier.

2. Got a vinator to squirt Star San up into the bottles; only way to sanitize.

3. Standardize on the same 12 oz. longneck bottle; mixed bottles take more time to process.

4. This isn't a particular item, it's making my house and setup work with me, not against me. For me, it makes more sense to sanitize the bottles with Star San the day before and put them in the dishwasher, then run the dishwasher & bottle the first thing the next morning.
Given cleanup & etc., I make no claim to be done in an hour, because I'm not particularly speedy or coordinated......but I'm at peace with bottling, wouldn't even consider the expense and complexity of kegging.
 
Carbonation never seems right? Just wait. Bottles are weird like that. I have had a batch recently which I swear took > 1 month to carb. It finally did, and was fine.

I also hate bottling though. I keg now exclusively. The cost is high, but it's better than getting kitchen space. Having to clean the kitchen before I bottle, having to clean the kitchen after I bottle.
 
I <3 my kegs.

Advantages of kegging:

1) Saves you about an hour (or more) per 5gal batch. If you do a batch a week, that's six and a half workdays of time per year you could be doing something else

2) A 5gal corny keg takes up a lot less horizontal space than two and a half cases of bottled beer

3) You aren't using up bottlecaps! Kegs are entirely reusable, so you're going green!

4) Women will love you, men will want to be you, and animals will want to learn how to talk so they can hang out with you! Having beer on tap is manly and increases testosterone production

5) You can always bottle if you keg, but you can't keg unless you . . keg
(hmmm)

6) Kegs are easier to carry and transport, and if you get in a car crash with a keg you aren't stuck hanging upside-down from your seatbelt in the overturned car while covered in beer and glass shards, waiting for Fireman Joe to show up with the Jaws of Life (although you may end up with a hell of a mouse over your eye from the keg if you don't buckle her up in the safety straps)

7) If you make your woman angry it's awfully hard for her to smash a keg on the coffee table and brandish it at you as she chases you down the block
 
jkreuze said:
I <3 my kegs.

Advantages of kegging:

1) Saves you about an hour (or more) per 5gal batch. If you do a batch a week, that's six and a half workdays of time per year you could be doing something else

2) A 5gal corny keg takes up a lot less horizontal space than two and a half cases of bottled beer

3) You aren't using up bottlecaps! Kegs are entirely reusable, so you're going green!

4) Women will love you, men will want to be you, and animals will want to learn how to talk so they can hang out with you! Having beer on tap is manly and increases testosterone production

5) You can always bottle if you keg, but you can't keg unless you . . keg
(hmmm)

6) Kegs are easier to carry and transport, and if you get in a car crash with a keg you aren't stuck hanging upside-down from your seatbelt in the overturned car while covered in beer and glass shards, waiting for Fireman Joe to show up with the Jaws of Life (although you may end up with a hell of a mouse over your eye from the keg if you don't buckle her up in the safety straps)

7) If you make your woman angry it's awfully hard for her to smash a keg on the coffee table and brandish it at you as she chases you down the block
Click to expand...

Hahaha classic! :mug:
 

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