The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

It's like some people are proud to be ignorant. That's weird.
Anyway...

Benintendi!!

Great time for his second tater!

Cheers!

paulthenurse said:

Cape, in the cold storage at the Bog.

View attachment 370841

"Uhhhhhh Brian, that's a TON of Pumpkin beer. Do you think you'll sell that much?"

"That's not for sale, that's for me."

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Got a lil Antonio Brown going on there.

One more.

Good for you, Trip.

Mooooookie

Cape Brewing said:

All of my dreams and hopes for this whole brewing career thing have officially come to fruition....

Ahhhh....

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Ummm, where is the "Falling Barrels"sign???

Up your azz

Big Papi!

Bullpen looking solid lately.
If the team keeps this up they might be atop the American League at the end of the regular season...

day_trippr said:

Big Papi!

Bullpen looking solid lately.
If the team keeps this up they might be atop the American League at the end of the regular season...

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Why is he retiring? He barely even has to run. He still smashes at the plate... seems like the ideal gig to me.

Because he does not want to wake up one day a shell of his former self, washed up, pathetic, a has been.

You know... Like you.

PETEY!!

Clutch Grand Slam saves a decent outing by Porcello for his 22nd win and the team's 10th in a row!

The Magic Number is now


- for the Division - and with this win they are officially in the playoffs!

Cheers!

That was an epic at bat. He kept fighting off pitches till he golfed one out

I thought I was going to hear shattering glass when Papi slid into second base the other night tearing the wheels off his ankles.

fwiw, I actually learned something about baseball stats on that play.
I always thought once a runner had "gained" a base it was credited to him regardless of what happens next.
But apparently the "gain" isn't "real" until the play is over, and if the runner touches but over-slides a base and gets tagged out, he gets no credit for that base.

Not that I'm big on stats 'n' stuff but I never knew that.

Of course, there are two exceptions: first base, and home plate...

Cheers!

I didn't know that either.

day_trippr said:

fwiw, I actually learned something about baseball stats on that play.
I always thought once a runner had "gained" a base it was credited to him regardless of what happens next.
But apparently the "gain" isn't "real" until the play is over, and if the runner touches but over-slides a base and gets tagged out, he gets no credit for that base.

Not that I'm big on stats 'n' stuff but I never knew that.

Of course, there are two exceptions: first base, and home plate...

Cheers!

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I think if the base runner were to get thrown out at third on a base hit (running from first) he would be considered to have gained second. Basically tagged out on a steal attempt even if you went by isn't chit but a dumb slide

This had all the appearances of being a double, including touching the bag, before any tag was applied.

And a steal is a whole 'nuther thing - this really had nothing to do with what you're saying...

Cheers!

If you missed the game tonite, watch the clip on this page...
http://m.redsox.mlb.com/news/article/203311808/red-sox-k-record-11-straight-win-11th-in-row/

I'm tellin' ya, this team has everything going on right now!

"The 23 strikeouts recorded, a club record. The 21 recorded in the first nine innings, which would have been a Major League record for a nine-inning game. The 11 straight strikeouts recorded in 11 consecutive plate appearances, a Major League record. The fact that 17 consecutive outs were recorded via strikeout. The astonishing two-hour and 11-minute drought in between balls put in play."

And the Division Championship Magic Number is now


Cheers!

Boom

He bobbs, he weaves, can't lay a glove on him ... :beard:

It's a Bizarro World: Red Sox clinched the American League East championship tonight by virtue of a Toronto loss to Baltimore - just before going ahead of the Yankees 3-0 in the 8th.

And then our 9th inning closer loads the bases, gives up a run, and his relief then gives up a walk-off Grand Slam.

So the Yankees win the game, the Sox win the Division, and both teams were celebrating at the same time. Don't see that happen often.

NESN's live coverage of the locker room champagne-fest caught a few F-bombs. Nice!

Cheers!

If you are ever drinking a glass of milk and you have about half a glass left.... and... there is a box of cereal on the counter so you figure, "hmmm... If I pour a little bit of cereal into the glass, I can drink it like the last little bit in a bowl of cereal"....

Don't do it.

When you tip the glass to drink it, just the milk will come down the glass, leaving all of the cereal at the bottom and you'll have to get a spoon and scoop the cereal out at the end.

I heard all of this... from a reliable source

Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

Cape Brewing said:

If you are ever drinking a 5 gallon pail of milk and you have about half a 5 gallon pail left.... and... there is a box of cereal on the counter so you figure, "hmmm... If I pour a little bit of cereal into the 5 gallon pail, I can drink it like the last little bit in a bowl of cereal"....

Don't do it.

When you tip the 5 gallon pail to drink it, just the milk will come down the glass, leaving all of the cereal at the bottom and you'll have to get a spoon and scoop the cereal out at the end.

I heard all of this... from a reliable source

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So, got this from Paul then?

Cape Brewing said:

If you are ever drinking a glass of milk and you have about half a glass left.... and... there is a box of cereal on the counter so you figure, "hmmm... If I pour a little bit of cereal into the glass, I can drink it like the last little bit in a bowl of cereal"....

Don't do it.

When you tip the glass to drink it, just the milk will come down the glass, leaving all of the cereal at the bottom and you'll have to get a spoon and scoop the cereal out at the end.

I heard all of this... from a reliable source

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Why are all my friends idiots?

paulthenurse said:

Why are all my friends idiots?

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Like attracts like?

Gfy

paulthenurse said:

Gfy

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I love you too

Sweet home, Massholechusetts
Where the skies are finally blue.
Yooper's back up in the Arctic,
And her lips are turning blue.

Welcome home kids.

paulthenurse said:

Sweet home, Massholechusetts
Where the skies are finally blue.
Yooper's back up in the Arctic,
And her lips are turning blue.

Welcome home kids.

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That poem sucks.

paulthenurse said:

Sweet home, Massholechusetts

Where the skies are finally blue.

Yooper's back up in the Arctic,

And her lips are turning blue.



Welcome home kids.

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Because blue rhymes with blue

Sweet home Massholechussetts
Where the skies are finally blue.
Yooper can kiss my azz.
And Hoppy can too.



That's better.

how not to tap a firkin

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5YrMq7YEWA[/ame]

That Pedrioa midget still plays?

Russel Wilson.

The Red Sox are playing?

HoppyDaze said:

That Pedrioa midget still plays?

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He was slowing down last year with petty injuries and then went on the IR. I thought that was the end of him. Plus he has a lot left on his contract. Then he comes off the IR this year and was in peak form. He's a dirt dog. Even got respect from a Yankee Rivera when he retired saying he admired his dedication and wish he had him on his team.


http://media.weei.com/a/114636335/david-ortiz-tells-everyone-not-to-panic-4-13-16.htm


Looks like a beach day tomorrow.

I would suggest we cut out David Price's heart and beat John Farrell with it until he is dead, but Price clearly has no heart