Can employees of LHBSes share idiotic things customers say to them? Because I got a real gem today - a guy wanted to make what I eventually determined was his conception of an imperial porter. He then said, "well, I really want to make something like Dark Lord from Three Floyd's..do you have a recipe for that?"
After I looked up a clone recipe and started going through what would be required, he realized it'd cost more than $50, because, ya know, there's like 12 lbs of fermentables for an extract batch, etc. Then, he revealed that he wanted it to be ready by Christmas! I didn't have the patience to explain why that was impossible, and directed him to a Bavarian Hefeweizen.
Some customers are pretty clueless.