Perhaps this post would be better framed if you pictured it delivered by a drunk (i.e. Me) who has just stumbled up to the bar, drained his half-full pint glass, slammed it down on the countertop, and after giving his lips a good wipe with his sleeve, eyes you deliberately, if a bit wobbly, and says: "Let me tell you something about America." He may or may not fall off his barstool at that point.
Ok. But seriously. This is what makes beer beautiful: grain, water, hops, yeast. Perfect! The elegant Czech Pils, the youthful German Hefeweizen, the bold India Pale Ale. One grain, one hops, one yeast--magic. Add just a touch of complexity and you get the subtle English Mild, the assertive Irish Stout, the glorious Trappist Ale.
Then, someone "discovered" America. Probably a good thing, on the whole.
Now, let me first say that America basically created the craft brewing movement. They revitalized the IPA, excavating it from the sweet, watery piss it had evolved to. They remembered classic styles like the Oatmeal Stout. They got creative and innovative, establishing new classics and new techniques. They diversified, micro-sized and beat back the behemoths that, in fairness, they had created. The brand names like curse words and blasphemes to the craft brewer: Bud, Miller, Coors (and Labatts, Molson, Tennents, lest I be mistaken for an anti-Yankee firebrand). For all this, I owe my southern neighbour my immense and eternal gratitude.
But srsly, wtf America? Imperial Pilsners? Chocolate Chili Porters? Pumpkin, Porcini and Spelt Ale? (Ok, I made that last one up.) I just got invited to a Hombrewer's Valentine's Day Party who is serving, and I quote: Vanilla-Mocha Porter, Red Hot Cinnamon Spice Ale and Aphrodisiac-Brown Ale infused with herbal contributions from the Urban Shaman! Like the British Office, America has taken a good thing and made it bigger, more extreme, more caricaturish (and funnier, it must be said) but, ultimately, worse.
Am I wrong? Probably. But sometimes I think the quest for the perfect Pilsner has been overrun by a 360 min Black IPA with 450 IBUs. (Disclaimer: I have tasted a Vanilla Coffee Stout that I hope will be served on tap in heaven.) I know there are a lot of brewers on here who distinguish themselves through their dedication to simple, elegant recipes. I guess what I'm saying is, I salute you, scions of simplicity. Thank you for keeping beer great. To the rest of you, please excuse this self-indulgent rant, and tell me why you love to brew the clusterf*cks you brew.
Love,
Batinse
Ok. But seriously. This is what makes beer beautiful: grain, water, hops, yeast. Perfect! The elegant Czech Pils, the youthful German Hefeweizen, the bold India Pale Ale. One grain, one hops, one yeast--magic. Add just a touch of complexity and you get the subtle English Mild, the assertive Irish Stout, the glorious Trappist Ale.
Then, someone "discovered" America. Probably a good thing, on the whole.
Now, let me first say that America basically created the craft brewing movement. They revitalized the IPA, excavating it from the sweet, watery piss it had evolved to. They remembered classic styles like the Oatmeal Stout. They got creative and innovative, establishing new classics and new techniques. They diversified, micro-sized and beat back the behemoths that, in fairness, they had created. The brand names like curse words and blasphemes to the craft brewer: Bud, Miller, Coors (and Labatts, Molson, Tennents, lest I be mistaken for an anti-Yankee firebrand). For all this, I owe my southern neighbour my immense and eternal gratitude.
But srsly, wtf America? Imperial Pilsners? Chocolate Chili Porters? Pumpkin, Porcini and Spelt Ale? (Ok, I made that last one up.) I just got invited to a Hombrewer's Valentine's Day Party who is serving, and I quote: Vanilla-Mocha Porter, Red Hot Cinnamon Spice Ale and Aphrodisiac-Brown Ale infused with herbal contributions from the Urban Shaman! Like the British Office, America has taken a good thing and made it bigger, more extreme, more caricaturish (and funnier, it must be said) but, ultimately, worse.
Am I wrong? Probably. But sometimes I think the quest for the perfect Pilsner has been overrun by a 360 min Black IPA with 450 IBUs. (Disclaimer: I have tasted a Vanilla Coffee Stout that I hope will be served on tap in heaven.) I know there are a lot of brewers on here who distinguish themselves through their dedication to simple, elegant recipes. I guess what I'm saying is, I salute you, scions of simplicity. Thank you for keeping beer great. To the rest of you, please excuse this self-indulgent rant, and tell me why you love to brew the clusterf*cks you brew.
Love,
Batinse