You can get started doing AG for about $155.
Get the basic beer starter kit from morebeer. $69 shipped
here
I made a 5 gallon round igloo MLT with cpvc pipe for about $28
Buy a cheap propane turkey fryer. I got one for $32 Which comes with a 7.5 gallon pot.
And lastly, you'll need 20 or 25ft of 3/8 inch copper tubing to make an immersion chiller. I couldn't find anyone that sold 25 feet so I had to get 20 feet from homedepot. I think it was about $27.
Lastly here is a nice All Grain video that will show you all the steps to AG.
This is the 1st of 8 of this guys videos. Watch all 8 a few times.
here
If the man knows next to nothing about brewing, any DIY projects or half of what you said is going to make his head spin 99 times out of 100.
I used to teach at the local community college, and I figured out that education while you're doing a simple first project that you can appreciate when you're done does wonders for a person's confidence.
Go read
www.howtobrew.com and start perusing it. Pick up a brewing kit from any of the fine establishments online that have been said. Make sure if the kit doesn't have it, get some sanitizer to make things easier on you. StarSan is fantastic (though don't worry about the foam. It turns into yeast food in the beer). Get a good brew kettle (4 gallons is good if you're *just* starting, but you'll have to upgrade) Buy a good kit (one that has malt extract, hops you add on your own, and probably some grains you'll have to seep) for 20-40 bucks depending on what you want. Buy a good kitchen spoon to stir everything. Buy a strainer too with some cheesecloth (makes filtering out the hops later EASY).
Then, brew your beer. Ask us for some pointers, post your instructions and let us give you suggestions on how to make things easier for you. Brew your first batch of beer, and see if you enjoy the patience and time it takes to brew. If you do, pick up the how to brew book, pick up the complete joy of homebrewing if you want a more user-friendly version, and get into talking here. Think about what kind of ales you like, and search the forum for people talking about those ales (you have a search function for this). See if there's anything specific that you need to know. Order your next beer, and brew it.
Take notes. A brew diary is fundamental. It could be a notepad file on your computer, or a hardcover journal, or like me, I use both. The journal to scribble and take "field notes", and then I feed everything into my computer later for easy review. Learn to take readings with your hydrometer. It's easy, and as long as you sanitize everything, it's pretty fun. Don't toss out your starsan solution, it's good for a month at least, so keep it in a tupperware bucket so you can sanitize anything you need quickly and easily.
I know it seems like a lot, but really, beer brewing is pretty procedural. You're doing the same thing over and over again, just with different ingredients. Don't worry about all grain unless you're the type to geek out on something immediately. Learn to brew well, learn to keep things cool and at the right temperature when fermenting, and learn patience. Once the fundamentals are down, you can move on to as complicated as you want.