Maybe that was actually a W for wonderful!
You know you're a home brewer when?
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Guinnes is a perfectly fine quaffer, but it ain't what it used to be, and has always been the lighter, more watery option compared to Murphy's or O'Haras.
When you sit on the couch with a pint from a freshly tapped keg and your teenage daughters are laughing at you for sniffing the glass so much.
That was me last night.
When you have 7 fermenters and you are trying to explain to your wife why you need to purchase another one. But honey I don't have a Fermzilla.
YKYAHBW...you just got the taxes done, and the bill is in the five figures (husband took his 401k as a payout from last job, don't do that kids), and you've been told to scale way back on the brewery purchases...but still buy a shiny new SS grain basket that will fit in the 5g kettle so you can brew smaller batches. It will be saving us money dear, I promise! I can brew smaller batches and use less grain, thus spending less money on the brewery....
You know you're a homebrewer when you split a bushel of live blue crabs with family and they ask where are we gonna steam them and you immediately say, they'll all fit in my mash tun.
... when your wife starts mentioning getting a chest freezer for food, and you quietly close your office door so she doesn't see those you have in there and start talking about using 1 of the 2 you have for brewing for such a silly thing as food...
You know you’re a hombrewer when you ask to borrow a large stock pot or turkey fryer for a clam bake because you don’t want to put mollusks and crustaceans in your BK.
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Looks like someone’s making Old Bay Gose in the future ;-)
Looking at those pictures, all I can say is yuk, will you every get the smell out?
I bet a hot pbw soak will take care of it. I must say that was a brave move though lol.
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There's a creation joke in there, but you ain't getting it here from me.
…when your chickens get excited when they see you carrying a stainless pot their way, ‘cause they know they are fixing to get a mess of spent grain!
Bill Tong
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What's your mash schedule?
I'd guess it's a decoction of some sort.
Reverse decoction. Turns beer into wort.
You know you’re a homebrewer (with too many friends) when it takes a case of beer to brew two cases of beer.
You know you're a BIAB homebrewer when you have to break out the mash tun for the ONE high gravity batch you've done in yonks, it takes forever, and there's more to clean; and you remind yourself WHY you love BIAB so much, at least 5 times during the brewday.
When your wife finally agrees that you need a dedicated brewery/bar space and decides that she is going to design it next build it out for you. Sacrificing her cafe/lounge space.
OK--Now we need to know how you finagled that
Have a brew schedule that is constantly churning out beer. Make her blackberry mead, tell her you will make her wine for her own craft sangria she makes. And just be a good dude.
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Is the "be a good dude" part a deal breaker?
Depends on your woman!
When you have a hurt back and you need to move your fermenter out of the fermenter chamber to the table so you can rack to your keg. You then take practice runs lifting with your legs and keeping your back perfectly straight. Well you manage to successfully move the fermenter without hurting yourself and while you are basking in your own glory the wife sees you and you get a ten minute lecture about doing ******* things when your back is still healing.
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Been there; done that. Got a $15 deer hoist from Harbor Freight, and I no longer have trouble lifting kegs into my keezer! Cheers!
I'm right there with you bud! About 20 years ago I was working on a 2 story apartment roof and backed right off it. Shattered 2 vertebrae and spent 4 months in a body cast. I still get "The Lecture".
No, when you think for a split second "a soak in Star-San should..."
Then... Well, then you are a homebrewer needs to order a new 2" bung.
Come on, a good soak will do wonders!
Well - PBW first, then Star San, right?
PBW, Star-San, bleach...
Nope. Trash.
Yeah seriously though, you’re right. If your bung has been under the floor down the toilet its time to buy a new one.
But who among us didn't think it?
Do you buy new hands every time you wipe your butt?
No, but my hands don't touch the poop (normally). That's what the paper is for.
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Back in the day we would give it 30 seconds in 'One Step.' It cleaned AND sanitized.
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