Dealing with a spouse on beer consumption

A couple weeks back, while working out an order for supplies, I accidentally thought out loud about the actual amount of beer I drink per week. Because my spouse was sitting there and money's been tight, I thought I'd let him in on how much I'm actually spending. So he says "Whatever is available in the fridge, that's how much you drink!! Why do you feel the need to drink them all? Can't you save some?"

Um... his reasoning is way off... I do save some, plenty actually, until they are ready to drink. Then, they go into the fridge for whatever time needed, which for the recipe kits I usually use is just a few days. I brew the amount I drink, plus some extra for friends on weekends and for the 6+ pints HE drinks per week!! The kits I use require room temperature conditioning, he thinks what I have available is what's in the fridge. He doesn't even know what all goes on in my "craft room". I buy fresh ingredients to brew the amount I drink and put them in the fridge a few days before I'm ready for them. Of course I'm going to drink everything I put in the fridge for drinking, the rest I've left to condition longer! Why refrigerate it when I'm not going to drink it right away and it'll taste better if I leave it conditioning in my craft room, then refrigerate when I'm ready to drink!

But how do you explain this stuff to a spouse, I guess sometimes you just don't, otherwise you'll give away all the secrets of your craft room!

"What occurs in the craftroom; stays in the craftroom!"

Ummm, your spouse isnt allowed to see your 'craft room'?

Craft room, sounds cool is it behind a secret panel? I have always wanted one of those....

He's allowed, but it's highly discouraged. My latest excuse was that the dog has been going back there to take a crap at night, hence the barriers. I actually do arts and crafts also, that's how I make my living... no, he's not welcome and knows he's not welcome in my "craft room". Besides, you have to be agile to navigate the room, and he's not agile.

behind a secret panel

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Yes, sort of like that, he once tripped, fell, and broke glass everywhere just trying to walk into the room. Since, he has not visited much.

Put up a sign sayimg Trespassers Will Be Shot

Trespassers Will Be Shot

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Yeah, really, I should put up a warning sign, if I'd smile when my own spouse walks in and gets hurt, imagine what could happen to a stranger!

It's always funny when spouses make comments like that, but still have no problem downing your inventory. Keep that craft room sacred (everyone needs their space). Anymore belly-aching from him get yourself a mini-fridge for the craft room and cut off his supply.

My wife scoffs at what I spend on ingredients, or when I need to fill a CO2 or propane tank. I want to tell her that if she'd prefer I'll just buy craft beer and let all the equipment go to waste.

Bob recently pointed out that I have too much soap, but am not oversupplied with beer.

I told him that it was HIS fault entirely.

All he has to do is shower more, and drink less. Then my hobby supplies will even out.

I guess I'm lucky, most people don't have a "craft room".

yeah my whole house is my craft room, and my wife gets irritated only seldom. Honestly the best way to avoid any conflict is to include your spouse as much as they want to be, or try to get them interested in it too. My wife loves the beer I make and eventually wants to make a batch of her own when she has time too. and only mentions my drinking when we are a health kick, as we usually drink together. Also you should mention that your ingredients and the beer you are making is much cheaper than buying the same amount at a store, even though you probably have much more beer than you would if you didn't brew.

yooper said:

bob recently pointed out that i have too much soap, but am not oversupplied with beer.

I told him that it was his fault entirely.

All he has to do is shower more, and drink less. Then my hobby supplies will even out.

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Bwahahaha!!!

But back to the OP, education is probably the key here. You can't understand what you don't know.

Yooper said:

Bob recently pointed out that I have too much soap, but am not oversupplied with beer.

I told him that it was HIS fault entirely.

All he has to do is shower more, and drink less. Then my hobby supplies will even out.

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Yes, showers are mandatory according to my spouse . . .



One of our boys lives at home and we've always been fine with them having a beer or glass of wine in the home. But I've lately been getting annoyed at him for all sorts of reasons but the pertinent one here is that he drinks my handmade beer without appreciating it or even understanding it. If I brewed more often, this probably wouldn't annoy me, I suppose. But I'm constantly on the verge of being out of beer.

Gameface said:

My wife scoffs at what I spend on ingredients, or when I need to fill a CO2 or propane tank. I want to tell her that if she'd prefer I'll just buy craft beer and let all the equipment go to waste.

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My wife gives me crap sometimes for what I spend on homebrew ingredients and equipment but then I remind her how much I'd be spending if I were buying this volume of commercial craft beer at $15-$20 for a 12-pack when I'm now brewing for $5 for a 12-pack of IPA and she lightens up...plus she actually enjoys my homebrews so she lets my "Craft-Room-Man-Cave" be!

My wife and I brew together and drink together so it all works out. I am glad I don't have to worry about being questioned about my brewing and drinking hobby... :cross:

Bachelor. Do what I want, when I want.

I guess I'm lucky, as long as I keep a constant supply of ipa's available for my girlfriend she even helps to pay for ingredients.

I would involve him in the brewing process. Or you could "charge" him for the beers he drinks and put the money in an ingredient fund.

RainyDay said:

Bachelor. Do what I want, when I want.

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And then cry in a lonely corner?

Really though, definitely introduce your spouse to the process of brewing. Guess I'm lucky that my SWMBO brews with me sometimes, but when she doesn't she still likes to hear about the process. Plus she's a fan of good beer and after paying $10 for a sixer, she's ok with my brewing expenses.

We are lucky. Our kids are grown and gone so the downstairs spare room has become my Wife's Craft/Fairy Room and the upstairs spare has become my Hobby/Man Cave. We have no problem going into each other's room and checking things out and even provide suggestions back forth for improving the setup.
Long story short, we fully support each other's interests!

My wife would threaten constantly that I was obsessed, spending too much time, money, energy brewing. Then I got her to start brewing with me. We now brew at least every other weekend, she hasn't complained once about the money spent, and she has a more defined palate toward beer. Inclusion is the easiest way to permission in my experience.

Inclusion is the easiest way to permission in my experience.

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A lot of comments like this... He tries that trick with me and drags me to tractor shows, invites me out to his shop to show me his latest restoration, but I'm just not interested!! My chances of getting him involved in my hobby are probably a lot better than his chances of getting me to understand his tractor obsession. At least I've got him drinking good beer now, and sometimes he'll even bring home commercial craft beers. I could try harder to get him involved, like look for recipes that are clones of his favorite commercial varieties. Or drag him to an event at our local homebrew shop!

Pappers_ said:

Yes, showers are mandatory according to my spouse . . .



One of our boys lives at home and we've always been fine with them having a beer or glass of wine in the home. But I've lately been getting annoyed at him for all sorts of reasons but the pertinent one here is that he drinks my handmade beer without appreciating it or even understanding it. If I brewed more often, this probably wouldn't annoy me, I suppose. But I'm constantly on the verge of being out of beer.

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Bob only showers once a day usually, so the soap will last us a LONG LONG time.

Maybe I can send some more soap to you, so he can not appreciate the handmade soap as much as he unappreciates the handmade beer!