todd_k
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2006
- Messages
- 2,640
- Reaction score
- 39
I'm sick and tired of the flagrant violations occuring these days in public (or work) restrooms. There are a few simple rules that if everyone followed them, the bathroom would be much better place to visit.
1. Give a guy some space - I don't like to be crowded, especially in public bathrooms. If there are a few stalls or urinals, and one is occupied, don't go into the one right next to someone else! If there isn't an open urinal, use a stall. There are too many things to concentrate on, I don't need your noises distracting me from my business. Obey the code!
2. Noises - Speaking of noises, keep 'em to yourself! No one wants to hear you grunting and groaning while you lay down machine gun fire in the stall next door. Give us some time to clear out before you start dropping bombs on your unsuspecting co-workers. I like to refer to myself as the stealth bomber. I'm in, I'm out, and no one knows I was even there. I realize that age does unkindly things to the digestive tract so please consider another less occupied bathroom before poisoning the air for the rest of us.
3. Conversation - There is no need for ANY bathroom conversations. You may exchange pleasantries; hello, how are you, etc. That is it! Anything you have to say to someone in a bathroom can wait until you are both outside. There is nothing more annoying than listening to 2 guys drone on and on about that damn meeting they just came out of. Any questions or comments you have are not as important as the task at hand!
4. Zippers - Do NOT lower your zipper until you have reached your destination! There is nothing more unsettling than some guy walking toward you while unzipping his pants.
5. Wash your damn hands - Unfortunately, most public bathroom doors have to be pulled to leave. This means that your nasty, bacteria-laden hands are touching the same handle or knob that my freshly washed hands touch. I don't care what you do at home but please, wash your damn hands when in public. You don't even need to use soap if it's that much trouble, just get 'em wet! Put on a show for the rest of us! Make us believe even a little bit that you care about washing that urine or possibly fecal matter off and not spreading it around the office via the door handle.
I think that's it. Did I miss any?
1. Give a guy some space - I don't like to be crowded, especially in public bathrooms. If there are a few stalls or urinals, and one is occupied, don't go into the one right next to someone else! If there isn't an open urinal, use a stall. There are too many things to concentrate on, I don't need your noises distracting me from my business. Obey the code!
2. Noises - Speaking of noises, keep 'em to yourself! No one wants to hear you grunting and groaning while you lay down machine gun fire in the stall next door. Give us some time to clear out before you start dropping bombs on your unsuspecting co-workers. I like to refer to myself as the stealth bomber. I'm in, I'm out, and no one knows I was even there. I realize that age does unkindly things to the digestive tract so please consider another less occupied bathroom before poisoning the air for the rest of us.
3. Conversation - There is no need for ANY bathroom conversations. You may exchange pleasantries; hello, how are you, etc. That is it! Anything you have to say to someone in a bathroom can wait until you are both outside. There is nothing more annoying than listening to 2 guys drone on and on about that damn meeting they just came out of. Any questions or comments you have are not as important as the task at hand!
4. Zippers - Do NOT lower your zipper until you have reached your destination! There is nothing more unsettling than some guy walking toward you while unzipping his pants.
5. Wash your damn hands - Unfortunately, most public bathroom doors have to be pulled to leave. This means that your nasty, bacteria-laden hands are touching the same handle or knob that my freshly washed hands touch. I don't care what you do at home but please, wash your damn hands when in public. You don't even need to use soap if it's that much trouble, just get 'em wet! Put on a show for the rest of us! Make us believe even a little bit that you care about washing that urine or possibly fecal matter off and not spreading it around the office via the door handle.
I think that's it. Did I miss any?
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