Say you are using cold fermentation techniques for a lager and holding the entire fermentation between 45-48 F the entire duration. 3 M/ml/P wouldn't be that much of an over pitch, to be honest. As a general rule, we are recommending people use 2.5 M/ml/P when fermenting cold. So the answer to your question may be temperature dependent as well. If you use an accelerated lager fermentation schedule, you may want to be in a lower range, i.e. the oft quoted 1.5 M/ml/P.
I'd say over/underpitching yeast would be more of "concern" with more ester driven styles. Trappist yeast, etc. where fermentation byproducts are a part of the finished flavor profile and also can be manipulated by combinations of fermentation parameters like temperature, pitch rate, etc.
Very true. There is no real way of knowing exactly what you are pitching unless you count the cells. This is fortunately not all that hard and the equipment isn't terribly expensive. You could probably set up a small counting "lab" for under $100. This may actually be worth doing if you repitch slurry with any regularity, but also helpful for knowing viability of newly purchased yeast as well.