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In my hometown, we always lock our car doors because of the giant pigeons.

Dick Cheney in retirement?

If you have a drinking problem. It's nice to have someone to turn to.

My dog matches the carpet.

This is my affordable beach house.

Summer's just around the corner.

My girlfriend always tries to color coordinate.

All I need is a cold beer, a good movie and my hoodie popcorn bowel.

After a long hard day, this make me happy.

Does a human sit in the woods?

I hate broccoli. Come to find out, broccoli hates me too.

Or you could buy one of these.

It is nice, but I did not make this one. You can buy one on Etsy.com. They are a little pricey, so you would be better off making your own. Check to see if you can buy a reducer fitting with the right threads.

One of my taps.

The backside of Mt Rushmore?

I warned my pet Pelican not to drink and drive, but he didn't listen.

I named my dog, Spot.

I'm ready for hunting season.