The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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The weather is here, wish you were beautiful?

I listened to dark side of the moon on repeat for hours one night when I was 14. I think side one, turntable could play it over & over again, but could not flip the record. My MY, how far we have come...
 
So we got just a scoche over 3 inches of perfect snowball snow here. I'm inclined to not bother with it as it's going to be in the 40s the next few days with a chance of some rain...
 
If you suburbanites want to grouse about the easiest winter we've had in a bit, that's cool I guess. It is not taboo, but then you're not a barnacle. ;]
 
You either need another beer, or you've had too many.
We're just talking 'bout the weather here. That's something people do for small talk in social settings...
 
You either need another beer, or you've had too many.
We're just talking 'bout the weather here. That's something people do for small talk in social settings...

Ah, and that is what I thought I was doing too, albeit in a somewhat curmudgeonly manner. I apologize if my discourse was too coarse...;}
 
lol! "bit and tads" I have no idea :D
that is what I thought I was doing
Well, yeah, it was that curmudgeon thing. Wasn't ready for it, you're usually quite chill ya know :)

Anyway...this is in the forecast, still 40 miles west of me and moving super slow.
Looks like you islanders will get wet, while I bet us flatlanders get mostly slush...

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Cheers!
 
Fair enough, the problem with these interwebs is one can't tell if someone is smiling when they type. Usually I'm joking around, for the record.

Rain or snow will mean work delays for me, not that I think always of that as a bad thing, ..

This winter wise;

On the plus side, have used 3 less cords of wood then this time last year.

Minus side is almost all of my 20 plus varieties of bamboo plants where whacked in that early Feb freeze out. Lots of leaf dessication= eventual defoliation and some species probably killed to ground. We only got to -4F, according to my monitors, but the 60+ knot wind fried a most of the groves. Not worried about the "workhorse" screening groves of P aureosulcatas and P bissettii, but some of the more exotic ones were set back hard. P vivax was just getting back up toward 60ft h & 3.5 inch d culms after being killed to ground on valletines weekend in 2016. Lots of the pretty smaller boos likely killed to ground too. I may even loose a couple of species, again,
 
Effin' nuts. What do people plant those for? Can't be screening if they grow so tall only the culms are at eye height and all the leafy bits are 50' in the air.
I typed my zip code in that "Can I grow it?" thing. Not surprised it was a big "Nope!" :D
 
The vivax is not for screening, is a "specimen" planting. You should be able to grow P bissetti or one of the varieties of P aureosulcata. P a 'Spectabilis' is a nice one. P bissettii is the most hardy, very good screen.

https://lewisbamboo.com/products/spectabilis
https://tripplebrookfarm.com/product/david-bisset-bamboo-phyllostachys-bissetii/
Not that this is best screen for everyone. But keep in mind that many trees will grow up, loose lower limbs and not be a good screen either, over time, especially in lower light.

Leyland cypress, Cryptomeria, Thuja plictata, Pseudosuga.. used to plant a lot of Canadian Hemlock before the woolly adelgid arrived a couple decades back.... Privet, rose of sharon, and a few other shrubs work if in good light,and only for one story screening.

But now I ramble, time to crash...aloha.
 
Most folks in my neighborhood aren't concerned much with screening as our lots are over an acre and heavily treed so we're visually not on top of each other. Good thing as it is difficult to grow most classic screening plants because the deer will enjoy them to death. Years ago one of my neighbors did plant a line of over 20 thigh-high arborvitae of some strain and they were totally gone within two weeks.

All that said I could totally see growing a small grove of those huge plants for bragging rights - they must be impressive looking! There is one home nearby that has a lot of different tall grass-type plantings which is pretty unusual for the area and it really stands out...
 
The vivax is not for screening, is a "specimen" planting. You should be able to grow P bissetti or one of the varieties of P aureosulcata. P a 'Spectabilis' is a nice one. P bissettii is the most hardy, very good screen.

https://lewisbamboo.com/products/spectabilis
https://tripplebrookfarm.com/product/david-bisset-bamboo-phyllostachys-bissetii/
Not that this is best screen for everyone. But keep in mind that many trees will grow up, loose lower limbs and not be a good screen either, over time, especially in lower light.

Leyland cypress, Cryptomeria, Thuja plictata, Pseudosuga.. used to plant a lot of Canadian Hemlock before the woolly adelgid arrived a couple decades back.... Privet, rose of sharon, and a few other shrubs work if in good light,and only for one story screening.

But now I ramble, time to crash...aloha.
I gotta say you've piqued my interest. I have privacy hemlocks which have been deer-nuded on the occasionally odd year to a bizarre perfectly level line 4-5' off the ground. A bamboo grove might be nice...
 
^^^Crab grass is an annual, it is dead now so you can't kill it. ;] But when the time comes, there are products to suppress crab grass without killing other grass, chemicals that selectively stop crab grass and not turfgrass, you can even put down when seeding new lawns..Tupersan is the one I have used, but I see it is off market, but there are a couple of others that are supposed to work OK.

On heavy equipment pathway myself. Just bought and downloaded a 3000+ page service manual for the telehandler. When it gets to the info I'm looking for, it refers me to another manual that seems unavailable, or of course, "go to you're Catterpillar Dealer" Cat is really a pig of a company that way, but they make good equipment, at least they used to. Spooky thing about this machine is its capacity to kill someone if not properly maintained, and last user was negligent, so I've got some work to do before I use it much.
Most folks in my neighborhood aren't concerned much with screening as our lots are over an acre and heavily treed so we're visually not on top of each other. Good thing as it is difficult to grow most classic screening plants because the deer will enjoy them to death. Years ago one of my neighbors did plant a line of over 20 thigh-high arborvitae of some strain and they were totally gone within two weeks.

All that said I could totally see growing a small grove of those huge plants for bragging rights - they must be impressive looking! There is one home nearby that has a lot of different tall grass-type plantings which is pretty unusual for the area and it really stands out...
I'm on three acres, but is a narrow lot & I've got a lot of stuff & activities. House next door just sold to some "normal people" for close to two mil, I somehow doubt they would be pleased if they could see though the bamboo curtain.

The deer are a factor here too, in a big way. There are a couple of things they don't eat, but they also eat a lot of things they are not supposed to. Firs, Spruces and American Holly (and not any of the others) are about all they have never touched, but Thuja Plicata, (green giant western arborvitae) is pretty safe too. Regular arborvitae is like candy to them.
 
I can see why they call this a "heart attack storm" what with the 6" of sopping wet snow.

Did my driveway, then observed one neighbor struggling with his wimpy 8hp Toro blower so I did most of his driveway. Was about to put the blower away when I saw the neighbor on the other side of us - with the 300 foot driveway and who moved here over the summer and still hasn't made any arrangements for snow removal other than buying a shovel - get about 50 feet from his front door then bag it to play with his young daughter. So I did his entire driveway and mail box across the street. Definitely scored some points on that deal, I should get an escort through the Pearly Gates when I arrive there :)

Cheers!
 
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"Rain all day" they said.
"Maybe a couple inches Mon night into Tuesday" they said.

Woke up to this maddening Spring wet-cement back breaking un-snow-blowerable crap this morning.

Mother Nature clearly abhors a painless lumbar/sacroiliac.
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We're in between the 6-10" and 10-14" bands. This storm is nowhere near done yet, and there's likely gonna be carnage.

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Our little ragtag dogwood which has been beaten down over the years might be toast this time.
I'm just hoping we don't lose power...

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Woof!
 
Ooof! Man that was some of the heaviest 7~8 inches of snow yet, super duper saturated. I couldn't let the poor dogwood fend totally for itself so I donned winter gear and went around the property shaking snow off the ornamentals, then decided I better do the driveway before it got much deeper. "Blower" was more like "pumper" with a solid tube of slush coming out the chute but got it done. I expect we'll get more but it'll be easier to deal with now.

Had to go pick up my truck after it got new tires, a badly needed alignment and an oil and vinegar change. Local roads were just OK but 495 was totally clear already...

Cheers!
 
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