SWMBO is pissed...

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Danny013

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So I'm in the kitchen today, workin' on cleaning the dishes like a good little man-slave, when SWMBO comes storming in the house waving the electric/utility bill around. Arrapently, it is $211 for our little 2/1 townhouse with the air set on 80 (GOOD GOD, is it hot all month! And I don't even save any furkin money!). But hey, wtf.

Anyway, so shes pissed, had a bad day at work, and of course, decides to take it out on me. She starts rampaging around the house, screaming about this and that, electric bill is expensive, blah, blah, blah. I'm more than a little annoyed. She starts saying to me, "You need to stop wasting so much electricity; you need to shut the lights off and open the windows when you do things!" So I says to her, "You need to shut your mouth and open your ******!".

...

She was not at all pleased by this remark. Stormed off to the nether. But hey, I thought it was funny, and now i are druck. And the coolest thing was, I said it without skipping a beat or cracking a smile. Bah.

Note: I am not a woman-hater, nor a chauvinist (sp?). I just felt that maybe, someone here is druck with me and would enjoy a fine story such as this.

Now. To the couch. CheerS!
 

Duckfoot

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I thought I heard a clanking sound earlier tonight... That must have been your GIANT BRASS BALLS slapping together....

On the flipside, you will probably be the only one playing with them in the near future...

:mug:
 

AnonyBrew

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Rookie move. Just agree & don't say anything else. If she's like the rest of the women in the world she won't even remember being mad in about 20 min.
 

bernerbrau

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Just this last Saturday, I caught SWMBO using the apple juice concentrate, which I bought for priming my cider, to make apple juice. I made the mistake of pointing out her error.

Over the next hour, it was made quite clear to me, in no uncertain terms, just how insensitive I am and just how little recognition she gets for all her hard work and just how quick I am to find flaws in everything she does.

Lesson learned. If you buy beer stuff and she uses it for something else, just shut up and go buy more.

If it becomes a pattern, though, then it's time for an intervention.
 

Dr_Deathweed

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Wow. You know we have all thought about saying something like that at one time or another, but most of us don't have the balls to do it. Then again, the rest of us will be getting something more than evil looks for the next few weeks...

You sir have a giant set of brass balls for this one, but unfortunatly I think Rosie Palmer is going to be the only one seeing them for awhile :D
 

Fingers

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Come ON, guys. He wasn't getting any anyway! She was already popping off and just DARING him to challenge her. Personally I'd rather have a week of no sex and the silent treatment than to just stand there and have my balls ripped off. Besides, sometimes the funny factor is just too good to pass up.

You go, Danny, you dumb **** you! :D
 

ChshreCat

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I made the biggest mistake of my marriage about 2 years in. It was "that time" and my wife was in "the mood". Something really small and normally insignificant came up and she went off on me for it. I finally got mad and said "You're only getting this MAD about it because you're on your PERIOD right now!!!"

She admitted to me the next day that I was actually right, but even if it's true to NEVER, NEVER, EVER point it out. LOL The thing is, as the words were coming out of my mouth, my brain was screaming "NOOOOOOOO!!!! STOOOOOOOP!" but it was too late.
 

brewprincess

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Oh yeah, that's going to cost you for a long, long, long.....time. But from my experience, she'll do something, with me it's spend too much at Dillards, and she'll recover. We're a manipulative gender.
 

Nurmey

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Oh yeah, that's going to cost you for a long, long, long.....time. But from my experience, she'll do something, with me it's spend too much at Dillards, and she'll recover. We're a manipulative gender.
I don't think it will be as straight forward as a spend binge. I think she is going to wait a really long time. Then, when he least expects it, she will reach over and rip his balls off (figuratively speaking).
She will also beat him over the head with those words for the next 20 years or so.
 

Matt Up North

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I say good on you, the couch isn't that uncomfortable, Palmela Anderson is always there for you...

...HOWEVER, there better be some back rubs, some quality time and lots of candles and oils in the near future from you to her.
 
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Come ON, guys. He wasn't getting any anyway! She was already popping off and just DARING him to challenge her.
My thoughts exactly.
My Swmbitch spent the night in the same mood. I took it in good stride for a few hours...then she pissed me off. Stupid SWMBO...I kinda told her off, pretty sure I'm not getting any more in the next 3 or 4 weeks than I did in the last 3 or 4 weeks.
Life is so much easier once you realize that you're not getting any one way or the other.
 

cubbies

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Good for you. Of course I am a "rookie" in the marriage arena, and the longer tenured folks are probably right, but I am the same way. SWMBO has been a real pain for the last several days and I am not the type of person who is going to sit back and get harassed and just say "yes dear". Getting walked all over like a doormat is not something I ever plan on doing. If she wants a fight, she can have a fight.
 

JWHooper

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Good for you. Of course I am a "rookie" in the marriage arena, and the longer tenured folks are probably right, but I am the same way. SWMBO has been a real pain for the last several days and I am not the type of person who is going to sit back and get harassed and just say "yes dear". Getting walked all over like a doormat is not something I ever plan on doing. If she wants a fight, she can have a fight.
Yeah, that was me 25 years ago. I still stand up for myself, and she still screams and punches and cries and kicks and throws things and cuts me off for weeks on end.

All I'm saying is don't think that you will ever train your SWMBO. 25 years of fighting and mine hasn't broken a sweat. I think she's still getting warmed up. It never ends. Don't be like me. Be smart. Just obey.
 

Lil' Sparky

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My SWMBO would stormed off into the nether just like yours


... only mine would have promptly returned aiming a gun at my head (or nuts) and dared me to say it again.
 

Jester369

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[RANT]

Why is it ok for women to flip out and we are just supposed to say "Yes, dear," when if we started ranting like that, we are the ones in the wrong? Why? Because we let it happen. It's a BS double standard that has become a socially acceptable, even expected, thing. You have to stand up for yourself. Just saying "Yes, dear," only gives further permission for your partner to treat you poorly in the future.

[/RANT]
 

Lil' Sparky

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I don't always just tuck my tail when SWMBO's on a tear, but also I know better than to respond with "shut your mouth and open your *****". I know I'm liable to end up with some portion of my manhood removed for such a comment.
 

Jester369

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I don't always just tuck my tail when SWMBO's on a tear, but also I know better than to respond with "shut your mouth and open your *****". I know I'm liable to end up with some portion of my manhood removed for such a comment.
:D Yeah, I wasn't saying that hitting a hornet's nest with a stick doesn't mean you shouldn't get stung :D
 

98EXL

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and in other news, I just got the go ahead flag from SWMBO it put her in check when she does this crap *cough*, like saturday night *cough* *cough*

Hey, at least you didn't get left at the bar, and had to walk a few miles home
 
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