Stupid Joke Thread!

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You might be a homebrewer IF:

Your wife says; “My meatloaf recipe calls for a cup of uncooked Quaker Oats, and we’re out!”

And you say:

“No worries, I have a 5 gallon gamma bucket half full of flaked barley.”

(True story; just happened! 🤣)
You're in the wrong thread!! That sounds great!... right up there with my LME glazed ham and my DME brownies and coffee-cake. My GF uses occasionally uses lentils in the meatloaf..quite good....I'm gonna give her some flaked barley for the next one, Thanks!!
:thumbsup:
 
You're in the wrong thread!! That sounds great!... right up there with my LME glazed ham and my DME brownies and coffee-cake. My GF uses occasionally uses lentils in the meatloaf..quite good....I'm gonna give her some flaked barley for the next one, Thanks!!
:thumbsup:
Yep, Costco Quaker Oats here too.

And just to add, "where's all the Minute Rice", she asks.
 
Usually the response here is:
"Oh yeah, sorry - I just used those this morning for my brew."
With me the conversation starts with, “Where’s the five pounds of flaked barley that was in the Gamma bucket.”

Followed by, “Remember the four dozen cookies I baked for the bridge club?”
 
Sounds like some of y'all need to work on your spousal communication...

If you or she don't know the other used something you're expecting to be there BEFORE you go looking for it:

LMm9gc.gif
 
Sounds like some of y'all need to work on your spousal communication...

If you or she don't know the other used something you're expecting to be there BEFORE you go looking for it:

LMm9gc.gif
I appreciate the humor, but really nothing like that. As a native Carolinian, grits are my favorite; I buy them directly from the mill in 25# sacks! However, my childhood favorite cookie was the oatmeal cookie recipe right off the oatmeal box. I like eating oats, but my preference after grits is steel cut oats; not the rolled oats. I can eat grits anytime, but prefer the oats in cooler weather. We just have not gotten around to filling our winter stock of rolled oats yet. But hey, I was careful not to be caught short of rolled barley for my Irish dry stout recipe! 🤣
 
Guy sits next to me on the train and says, “there’s a lot of psychopaths around here.”

“Really?” I reply.

“Yeah, loads. I love them.”

47 minutes of awkward silence follows until he gets off the train. As the train pulls out I see the man getting on his bicycle and I realize he meant cycle paths.
 
Politicians

A politician visits a remote northern Native American reservation. With news crews following him around as they tour the place, the politician asks the chief if there was anything they need.

"Well," says the chief, "We have three very important needs. First, we have a medical clinic but no doctor to man it."

The politician whips out his cellphone, dials a number, talks to somebody for two minutes and then hangs up. "I've pulled some strings. Your doctor will arrive in a few weeks. Now what was the second problem?"

"We have no way to get clean water. The local mining operation has poisoned the water our people have been drinking for dozens of years. We've been flying bottled water in, and it's terribly expensive."

Once again,the politician dials a number, yells into his cellphone for a few minutes, and then hangs up. "The mine has been shut down, and the owner is being billed for setting up a purification plant for your people. Now what was that third problem?"

The chief looks at the politician and says, "We have no cellphone reception up here!"

OOPS!
 
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