Stone Cold Lead Pipe Lock'd N00b Advice

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If your airlock bung keeps slipping out of the Carboy, it's wet. Wipe or dip it with vodka or a clean paper towel and put it back in.
 
When you ask a question, you will get several (some seemingly contradictory) answers.

You know what? Chances are most (if not all) are right! There are many many ways to brew. Experiment.

A corollary:
When you ask for advice and someone gives it, don't argue with them.
 
Jesus H Roosevelt Christ what is that thing in your avatar GreenwoodRover??

Oh yea, advice. This is one hobby where procrastination pays off many times. I meant to do that at the beginning of this thread but I put it off.
 
This is relaible advice for a standard beer.

1week primary
2 weeks secondary
3 weeks in bottles (70 degrees for 21 days)

If your beer has a high OG, it's not. Three weeks in primary is not going to kill your big beer. Several months in secondary is not going to kill your big beer.
Several years in bottles is not going to kill your big beer (but that doesn't mean you have to wait that long).
 
In some places, tap water tastes great and is perfectly suitable for topping off with.

In others you need to boil first.

The water here is good, so I can actually sanitize bottles in my dishwasher with just a tiny amount of dishsoap.
 
why would you use dishsoap to sanitize??

:drunk:

I clean them first and then use the dishwasher on it's heat cycle (with no soap.)

+1 on the tap water MIGHT be ok...check your local water information and taste
 
Do not squeeze the bag you steeped your specialty grains in; it'll produce mouth-puckering tannin taste.

Do put your extract in warm water to soften it up before trying to add it to the brew kettle.
 
That foamy stuff at the top of your fermemnter is krausen...not an infection. If you think it is infected taste it...thats how you can really tell.

and then let it sit for two weeks and taste it again. and then let it sit for 6 months and taste it again. if it doesn't make you cough up green or blue chunks, your beer is fine.
 
In beer "trouble shooting," always think "evaluation" before "action" in other words, evaluate the beer using proper tools (hydrometer, tastebuds, nose) before doing something to "fix" it (i.e. Re-Piching yeast, bottling, or dumping.)

You can't fix something unless you know it's broken...And you can't know something is wrong if you don't "listen" to your beer.

Our beer talks to us in many ways...The most obvious is through our senses. Sight, taste, smell. But that can easily be deceiving; We can misread lack of bubbles in the airlock, or not seing a krauzen as a problem, when in reality the airlock is pretty faulty piece of cheap plastic jambed into a cheap gasket and could easily leak or be askew, or the krauzen hasn't yet started or came and when between our checking on it.

We can taste a beer when it is green, and think it is infected or flawed, because things "funky", but which more than likely will be gone in decreased as the beer matures.

And can anyone say "Rhino Farts?" :D (Use the search is you don't understand that reference.)

See, our senses, especially if we are new to this obsession, can be deceiving. But with experience we can use them to help listen to the beer, but that takes time to learn..

There is one other language that the beer speaks to us in, and it is pretty infallable. It is the language of "Specific Gravities," that is a beer or wine's native tongue. You'll be less "Paranoid" when you can speak the language of your beer...and the babel fish translator of specific gravity into human speak is the hydrometer...

Most new brewers think something's wrong and do something in a "panic," before evaluating truly if something is indeed wrong.

A lot of time it seems, based on the number of threads, that the main issue or fear is lack of fermentation, or "stuck fermentation."

More than likely your beer is fine and one or two things has happened, it finished early (fast fermentations do occur) or it hasn't even begun yet (remember fermentation can take up to 72 hours to begin) and nothing is wrong in either case.

Fermentations in normal beers don't get stuck unless there are a lot of fermentables present (then it wouldn't be a "normal" grav beer) or there is a major downward temp shift. But otherwise, the above scenarios have more than likely occured.

Don't ever repitch or even consider repitching before you take a hydrometer reading.

Don't ever rack if you suspect something is wrong before you take a hydrometer reading.

Don't ever bottle if you suspect something is wrong before you take a hydrometer reading.

In other words; Don't try to fix a problem unless know that there is indeed a problem, and don't assume there is a problem just because the beer isn't acting in the way you think it should be.

Often if your beer isn't ruined, your trying to fix it may actually cause it more harm than good. For example if you bottle too soon because you see white fizzy stuff on your beer (which usually are post krauzen yet still active yeast colonies) you may be setting yourself up for bottle bombs.

Remember, unlike coolaid, or inorganic chemistry, we are dealing with living microrganisms (yeasts) and like any living things (think teenagers or swmbo's) they have their own agenda, and their own timeframe...They will do the job you ask...but at their own pace.

I subscribe to the philosophy that the yeast has been doing this making beer thing since long before I was born, so they're the experts, and they rarely fail. Our job is just to provide them with a clean and sanitary temporary office to work in, and to let them have plenty of food to eat...The rest of the job should be left to them.

Yes sometimes problems occur...But it is rare. And the only way to know for sure is to listen to them in their native tongue, not yours.

Just rememer this simple motto, "evaluation" before "action" and all will be well.:mug:
 
Do not make your first post ever in the Stone Cold Lead Pipe Lock'd N00b Advice thread. :drunk:
 
FirstPost.jpg
LOL. Welcome!
 
It has been mentioned that fermentation does not occur in the 'secondary'. If you believe your primary has finished (no bubbles/activity) and you've let it sit for days with no activity, and rack to the 'secondary' -sometimes fermentation will not truly have finished, but became 'stuck', and you will see activity in the secondary. Don't sweat it. Give it a week. I had this happen on my second or third batch, and it really made me upset (I figured I'd managed to get an infection colonizing and undoing the excellent work my 'authorized' yeast had started.
But I figured I had nothing to lose, and once things had stopped and settled, I tasted the finished product (not bad) and bottled it. I had some pretty fine beer a few weeks later.
 
Purchasing a copy of Beersmith will be the best $21.95 you ever spent on home brewing equipment. You can even try it free for 21 days!

Ways that Beersmith makes home brewing easier and more fun:
  • Hydrometer Adjustment Tool
  • Easy to Formulate Your Own Recipes
  • Keeps a Record of Your Brewing History
  • Automatically Generates Brew Sheet Instructions
  • Comprehensive Lists of Beer Styles and Ingredients

*Edit*
You can also check out QBrew. It's free but doesn't have as many features as Beersmith.

*Edit 2*
Regarding some of the comments about Beersmith being too advanced for a beginner. I agree that most of Beersmith's features are beyond the level of a beginner but since it's free to try, you may as well download it and play with it for a bit. If you're serious about brewing as a hobby, it won't hurt to start familiarizing yourself with it early.
 
I agree that Beersmith is an excellent program -but I'd say its a little beyond the scope of the new brewer. I've never tried QBrew (though I will check that one out just out of curiosity. I love Beersmith, and am looking forward to trying my first full-grain recipe from it -once I finish rebuilding my brewery).
Beersmith DOES have the ability to convert grain recipes into extract recipes and would be a nice move once the new brewer gets tired of packaged kit recipes.
 
I agree that Beersmith is an excellent program -but I'd say its a little beyond the scope of the new brewer. I've never tried QBrew (though I will check that one out just out of curiosity. I love Beersmith, and am looking forward to trying my first full-grain recipe from it -once I finish rebuilding my brewery).


Beersmith DOES have the ability to convert grain recipes into extract recipes and would be a nice move once the new brewer gets tired of packaged kit recipes.

A good free introductory online brewing calculator is Beer Calculus . homebrew recipe calculator I learned so much about homebrewing and recipe creation simply from playing with it....I've switched to beersmith subsequently, but for the new brewer, beercalculus is a piece of cake to use....
 
Take notes.

At every stage of the process, especially if you are just starting out, take notes on everything you can, gravity, volume, temperature, time, etc, because if you make an excellent beer, you'll need this info to make it again. If you make a horrible beer, or something goes wrong, the experts you're looking to for help will be able to answer your questions better if you can provide more data.

Look around for a good brewing sheet template and fill it in as you go.
 
Not sure if this is the right thread for this, but it seems to be.

TURN OFF THE HEAT when adding LME.
As I mentioned in this thread, if you dump LME into your pot it will sink to the bottom and burn. I am drinking this batch right now and I AM able to taste the burnt LME.
 
If you are doing a primary in a plastic bucket and there are no bubbles in your airlock, there is probably some co2 leaking either around the lid or around the airlock gasket. That's okay, leave everything alone. Check your gravity after a week in the primary using your HYDROMETER. Assuming you checked your gravity before you fermented, you should now see that everything was fine because your gravity dropped.
 
When (not if) you break your first hydrometer:

a) Don't worry, the pieces will sink into the trub and the beer won't be ruined. Next time, don't get the hydrometer near the fermenter.

b) Save the paper 'yardstick' from inside. Put it into your notebook. Very useful for converting SG to balling or potential alcohol.
 
Don't be lazy. Read the entirety of "Stone Cold Lead Pipe Lock'd N00b Advice". You will learn something.
 
To understand what makes a good beer, and how to make your own, all the recipes, books and web information out there cannot replace actually seeing, smelling and tasting the different ingredients that go into it.
 
You may here a lot of people recommending kegging...It's up to you what ultimately you choose to do. But don't let zealots convince you that no one bottles...actually there is probably a vast majority of brewers who still bottle for various reason. And even many experienced keggars rack some of their beer to bottles and prime and condition with sugar, or they use a beer gun (either blickman or Biermuncher's) to fill some bottles.

If you enter contests then bottling is a must.

I don't have the space or money to keg right now, nor do I think in the future when I move out of my loft will I keg exclusively. There is still something about cracking open a bottle of your own beer. And not many people want to take a keg on a picnic or to a game, when a six pack will do (and it's hard to stick a keg in your pocket when you are trying to sneak a beer in somewhere, not that I know anything about sneaking homebrew in.)

Bottling doesn't have to be a chore.

The trick to bottling is to make the process work for you...to make yourself as comfortable as possible doing it. It took me a few batches but I got it dialed in enough to get it done in about an hour for a 5 gallon batch....not including clean up. One of my half batches can be done in 20 minutes

You just gotta dial in your process,....try different things until they work for you, until you've pimped it down to the bare minimum of steps...and practice practice practice...and if it doesn't work for you, then scrap it and change it again...

Eventually you will find exactly what works for you.

For example I hated the bottling wand on the end of a hose, with the bottles in beer case method, that most people use..You know, then one shown in Papazian's book where the bucket is on the counter and you sit on the floor and fill the bottles sitting in the cases....well the first time I did that, I lost track of where I was in order, and actually capped about a half dozen empty bottles...as well as spilling a sh*tload of beer because I could really see when the wand was putting the beer to the lip of the bottle....a ton would spill out....

Plus sitting for so long on the floor was bad for my back....

So I kept tweaking my process until I was happy...


I have my bottling wand mounted right on my bucket's spigot...

bottling_wand.jpg



So I can sit at my dining room table and fill bottles confortably...I prop my bucket on a pot, or fermenter bucket to bring it up to my eye level. (Actually that pot is too low, I have now moved it to the top of my boil kettle...a fermenter bucket is about the same height and works great as well.

bottling1.jpg


I have a dip tube in my bucket so I get all but about 4 ounces of stuff from my bottling bucket. What that means in my case is about another 6 pack of beer- 54 bottles instead of 48.

dip1.jpg


dip2.jpg


Here's an overview of my process

The first thing I do is set the fermenter on my dining room table, and open it (briefly) to take a gravity reading, so I can calculate the amount of priming sugar I need. (I carb to style and use beersmith to tell me how much I need.) Most of you in your first few batches will be using the stock 4.5 - 5 ounce packets that came with you ingredient kit.

Putting the fermenter in position first gives some time to let the beer settle since I just moved it. Some folks put it in position hours ahead of time, but I've never seen the need.

After I've set the bucket down, and figured out how much sugar I need, I measure it out and set it to boil. I start my priming sugar water boiling.

Then I start sanitizing my gear. I fill my bottling bucket with about 2 gallons of diluted starsan, and add my auto siphon, my bottling wand, my dip tube setup and anything else I may need into it, after first swirling around the bucket a few times to spread the sanitizer along all the sides of it. I then set the bucket on the table, and autosiphon about half of the sanitizer into another bucket. This sanitzes the inside of the autosiphon and the hose. After abut a gallon to gallon and a half of sanitizer has run through it. I open the spigot to flush that with the remained of the sanitizer as well.

Then I install the dip tube that is pictured above.

By now I usually can hear the boiling of my solution in the kitchen. I check on it, and perhaps lower the heat a bit to a gentle boil.

Then I begin to sanitize my bottles with my vinator....after the first case is sanitzed then take the priming solution off the stove to let it cool a bit, you can set it in a bit of cold water in your sink. Then I go back and sanitize my second case and final sixpack of bottles.

After sanitizing I count out my bottlecaps and drop them in my vinator to sanitize. I set my bottling bucket below the fermenter and pour half of the priming solution into the bottom of the bucket then I start racking the beer on top of it. When I get to 2.5 gallons I I add the remainder of the solution to the bucket.

When ready I put a pot lid on top of the bottling bucke, and gently lift it on top of a pot, or the empty primary bucket and clip on the bottling wand to the spigot. Then I get ready to bottle.

Since I'm a lefty I work right to left on my table....I put my two cases of sanitized bottles on the right hand side of the table (on the chair next to me,) I put the vinator on the table to the right of the bucket filled with my bottles caps sanitizing away. Then when I fill the bottle I place a cap loosely on it, and move it to the left side of the table...with the bottling bucket in the middle of the table there's room for a case worth of filled bottles on the table on the left side.

When I hit 24 bottles, I stand up, move the empty case to a chair on the left side of the table, then I pick up my capper and cap the first case of bottles, putting them in the case on the chair nearby...Then I grab a beer from the fridge, and sit back down and do the next case of beer....

I can get them all done and the bottling bucket and stuff soaking in oxyclean between 45 minutes and an hour....
 
I wanted to add a few more notes and a couple more pictures.

To illustrate how each brewer should tweak a process (anyone one, not just bottling) until it works for them, Grinder1200 took my idea of mounting the wand on his bucket, and added it to using his dishwater as a bottle filling rack. (I don't have a dishwater in my cubbyhole kitchen, but if I did, I would probably do the same thing..though I do enjoy sitting to bottle.

best954.jpg


A lot of people have asked where I got the clamps for the the wand.

I get these from my lhbs, to clamp the wand to my sigot, I use a 1 inch "bridge" piece of bottling hose....If the LHBS doesn't have them, I'm sure you can find them a a hardware store too...it's nice because there is no worry about rusting, of the fact that sometimes the screw is galvanized.

SNP-10.jpg


I don't label unless I'm giving bottles away as gifts, then I don't use traditional labels, I bottle hanging tags. I designed the template and it is freely available online. Thanks to Morotorium

After looking all day for hanging tags templates for bottles, I made up one of my own as a MS word Document.

Bottle%20tags.jpg


Each tag is approx 2 inches wide, and the text area after the fold is about 5 inches.


I don't like to glue labels on, especially since I spend so much time removing them (Although some folks swear by milk as label glue). So I like the idea of a hanging tag that slips over the neck of the bottle and hangs there. I printed it out on thick photopaper. All you need to do is cut them out, cut out the hole for the neck (or just make 2 slits at the cross) and fold it downword.

You just basically need to stick a graphic in each space, and add your own text to the text blocks...Or move stuff around and add your own text boxes wherever you want it.

Here's the links from MoRoToRiUm
Sample

Template

When I bottle I just write on the bottlecap with a sharpie a letter code for the name of the beer I brewed. For Example, Old Bog Road (my brown ale) is simply OBR...If I have multiple batches of the same beer going at the same time, I will add a letter code as well.

Again, there are plenty of ways to do just about every aspect of brewing, and the trick is to make it work for you. This is a hobby, not something to do battle with. Even something that some people consider a pain, such as bottling can become as effortless as you choose to make it. All it takes it experimentation; trying something new until it works for you.

:mug:
 
On using the search feature....

I've learned some things about the search feature here that can make it less frustratiing and more accurate.

You CAN actually tweak it to work for you and can save your preferences for using it again next time....

Don't use the standard drop down search...when you pull it down click on advanced search, which will give you a full page...Or you can right click on it and open it as a new window or tab...

On the top left is a box that says "Search by key word" then there is a text box below that...below that is a drop down menu...you have the option to search by titles or for the word in the thread...unless I know a specific title phrased perfectly, I change it to search IN THREAD for the key word...unless the word is too short OR to common you will find more information by searching inside the threads..

On the right hand you can select the name of a poster....(I betcha if you searched for posts by me, you'd find something) or you can leave it blank..

I ignore all the search options below that EXCEPT the one labeled "Show results as"

I usually select threads rather than posts...because if you choose posts, you may end up with EVERY POST in a single thread that has your word...and not necessarily be the thread you are looking for...if you select show as threads, you will get a list of threads instead...

This MIGHT be the singular issue with people using the search and why they don't like it...

And then at the bottom, you can save the preferences so that all the time you use the advanced search it is set that way...

The search isn't great...but a couple quick hacks in advanced search and you will find what you need.

search.jpg


The thing to me about searching is two fold, and I really hate coming off as a search nazi, BUT

1) There is a huuuge amount of state of the art brewing info on here...info that is even more current than palmer (only becasue it takes 2-3 years to get a book out.) Some of us have spent hours writing stuff up, like blogs or long answers to basic questions, including searching for links like audio and video casts to answer those basic questions...And we want you to know it exists, and we want you to utilize it to be the best damn brewer's you can be.

SO when I say it's been covered before, I'm not saying "hey a$$hat, use the search."

I'm saying "Hey, there's some kick ass info on that very topic, put together from some amazing brewers, and it's free, right here, you don't need to buy a book....all you need to do is click "search" and maybe play with the words a couple times...


2) A lot of the "kick ass brewers" who are here, and were here before I got here have stopped answering the same noob questions over and over. Most of those people get tired of it after a couple months, and just ignore these threads...From what people tell me, for doing it constantly for a year, I'm an anomoly....maybe because of my 'calling" (yes I am a minister for the 10,000th time ) I have an almost pathological need to help people...whether it's in a church or in a brewery.

Which means that the people who might be best able to answer your basic question are NOT going to because they did it 6 months ago, and feel that that's enough. Or they are no longer here...but their info is still here and still valuable...

So that really means that if you just start a thread, especially if you are asking about "Stainless vs Aluminum" or Plastic waterbottles or "is my beer ruined," or "what;s your opinion on...?" You may not GET THE BEST INFORMATION YOU COULD BE GETTING You could be getting the same outdated "party line" out of Palmer or Papazian, (which are actually several years of in the case of Charlie over a decade old) when there was some new discovery a few weeks back that we all talked to death and learned from...and we want you to know about it too...

I also have found, as someone that answers a lot of questions everyday, that if a person reads a thread on their "basic question" first and maybe bumps that thread up, that their question has a lot more depth than it might have been...because maybe they zeroed in on an issue from one or more of the posts in a thread...and then rather than,

"What's that fuzzy stuff on top of my beer?" To "Oh I thought my beer was infected, now I know it's a krauzen, it's normal, and it has proteins and other things in it, so what kinda proteins are there, do they come from the yeasts, the wort or both, and should I skim it or not?"

Which is more fun for me to answer because it may lead me to search, or to google or to recall some fuzzy bit of info I heard on a podcast and go search for it for you...and for me...


Hope this helps, and I hope you realize that those of us who suggest that you search for an answer not trying to be mean to you, nor are we lazy...we just want you to have the best brewing info that there is to be found on here...and there is plenty of it.

:mug:
 
Rules.

1) KISS
2) If I disagree or am convinced it can't be summed up in a sentence or 3, I'll delete it.
3) Eventually all discussion posts will be deleted or edited so that only the KISS advice remains.
4) One topic per post. Keep it minimal or it will be MERCILESSLY edited or deleted at my whim.
5) Again. Stuff will be MERCILESSLY deleted at my whim.
Just sayin'.
 
after cleaning bottles and or removing labels, dump (drain) each bottle's remaining liquid one last time before storing. This should help to reduce any possible build up at the bottom of the bottle.
 
How in the hell did you find those 9 words in that 1,000 word post? :D

Just goes to show...some people actually read what I have to say with interest, despite it's length...

Or maybe only ministers do, since we tend to be verbose...

Pizzaman, neither my handle or avatars gave it away? :D
Actually there are quite a few of us on here...Brewpastor comes to mind immediately.
 
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