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Lambert's Cafe Sucks

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I don't know if you've ever eaten at Lambert's Cafe in Sikeston, MO (home of the "throwed" rolls, but if you ever get the chance, DON'T.

The food is seriously the worst I have ever had in my life (except the rolls, those are admittedly pretty good). But if that isn't enough, they DON'T SERVE BEER. I asked the waiter what beer they had on tap and his response was "I'm sorry, we don't serve alcohol." To which I had to look askance and point out that I wasn't asking for alcohol, I was asking for beer. It's not like I was asking for a shot of tequila. He then informed me that Lambert's is a family restaurant and left it at that.

If they're going to have the audacity to serve me the worst food I've ever had, at least have the good grace to serve it with beer.
 

friarjohn

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Dude, your smoking crack! their food is awesome. If you cant go one meal without a beer you may need to seek out some help.
 

Joker

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Dude, your smoking crack! their food is awesome. If you cant go one meal without a beer you may need to seek out some help.
I have to agree. I have family back in Misery and have been to Lambert and it was very good.
 

Bedlam

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Honestly, I grew up making the 3 hour trek to Lambert's on the occasional Sunday afternoon (in the back seat of a Buick Riviera and with a cheapskate dad who would never dreeeeaaamm of putting on the A/C). As a kid, I loved the novelty of throwed rolls.

But I get the OP's point: if I'm paying >$10 per plate at a restaurant, then that's an event for me and I want the freedom to choose a quality beer to chase it down.

I am also very resentful of the notion that a "family" restaurant can't serve alcohol in any form.
 
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I am also very resentful of the notion that a "family" restaurant can't serve alcohol in any form.
I resented it too and that's what set the tone for the rest of my time there.

Pros:
1. The rolls were good
2. I didn't leave hungry

Cons:
1. They don't serve beer
2. The "pass around" sides are disgusting (macaroni and tomatoes? who the hell would want to eat that?)
3. My steak was mediocre at best. I make better steak on my grill at home
3a. The homemade mashed potatoes tasted like cardboard. The gravy tasted like dog sh!t.
4. It's way too loud to have a conversation
5. Everything but the steak is either deep fried or pan fried. It's impossible to get something healthy that tastes good too
6. They suggested that beer was not conducive to a family-oriented atmosphere
7. The wait staff is overworked
8. Kids everywhere (i know it's to be expected in a gimmicky place like this but hey, it still sucks)
9. A thin, slimy coat of butter is on everything, including the floor which i slipped on
10. Overpriced. Big time.
 

cheezydemon3

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At first I was with you Nintendo dude, but your intolerance of kids and those taking the time to raise them just lost me.
 
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Kids were only one part of the list and came with a disclaimer. If kids were the only annoying thing I encountered there I wouldn't have minded one bit. It's a gimmick restaurant. I expected kids. No big deal even if it is annoying.

But for the record eating at out at a normal restaurant with loud, obnoxious kids all over the place is really annoying and I stand by my displeasure in that regard. And by the way, it's not the kids that annoy me. It's the jerk parents who have no respect for anyone else and don't even try to keep their kids from screaming and crying the whole time.
 

cheezydemon3

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Sorry! Shouldn't have jacked the thread over it, but........I have come to believe that:

A. All kids, even YOU yelled, screamed, cried, and went berserk at some time or twenty.

B. The people raising those kids have SOOOOO much more responsibility and stress than you do, they deserve your patience and understanding at the least.

C. Yelling, screaaming, spanking, or otherwise disciplining those kids in public only makes a bigger scene.

The sound of kids is the sound of a reasonably healthy society. If all the toxins in our environment render us all sterile someday, we will miss the sound of kids.
 
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I can't disagree with any of those points. I know I was a terror as a kid, no doubt. And a place like Lambert's is perfect for kids. It's annoying when they're screaming or running around the restaurant and the parents are just letting it happen, though, which is why I included it. Did I expect it? Yes. Is that why I don't like Lamberts? Only a very small part. The food and beer are my true complaints. The loud kids were just some icing on that foul cake.
 

Synovia

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Sorry! Shouldn't have jacked the thread over it, but........I have come to believe that:

A. All kids, even YOU yelled, screamed, cried, and went berserk at some time or twenty.
Not in restaurants. Some parents have the good manners to leave when they're bothering everyone else in the restaurant. Some parents find a babysitter because their kids can't behave.

B. The people raising those kids have SOOOOO much more responsibility and stress than you do, they deserve your patience and understanding at the least.
Yes, and they have a responsibility not to act like animals. No, they don't deserve our patience and understanding. Having children is a decision, and with that decision are sacrifices and responsibilities.

C. Yelling, screaaming, spanking, or otherwise disciplining those kids in public only makes a bigger scene.

The sound of kids is the sound of a reasonably healthy society. If all the toxins in our environment render us all sterile someday, we will miss the sound of kids.
The sound of kids, yes. Kids running around restaurants and screaming while other people are trying to eat? Not so much. That's not a sign of healthy society.


I know I'm being harsh here, but parents have a responsibility to make sure their children are at least somewhat reigned in. For some reasons, it seems like parents of young children have decided that their own needs are more important than those around them.
 

bad67z

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^^^ +1 to everything that Synovia stated, We are blessed to have a 9 year old son, and he knew buy the age of 2 if he acted up it would be the last time he would see a restaurant for a very very long time. That is called "parenting". You and only your are responsible for instilling in you child(ren) what is acceptable in public places.

My wife and I both started out in the restaurant business and have seen it all, it is never the children in our experiences it is the parenting practices or lack there of.
 

cheezydemon3

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I know I'm being harsh here, but parents have a responsibility to make sure their children are at least somewhat reigned in. For some reasons, it seems like parents of young children have decided that their own needs are more important than those around them.

The reason I said EVEN YOU, is that even great, well behaved kids have a blow up at some point in a public place. There is no controlling it or reigning it in. Also, it is not always practical or even possible to just leave, food uneaten, maybe you can flag the waiter, maybe not.

I am just saying that sometimes, even good parents and good kids find themselves annoying everyone in the restaraunt, on the plane, etc.

It should be the exception, not the rule, but unfortunately insensetive people will see it the same regardless.

So while I think you should cut them slack, and you think they should starve and not bother you, you won't listen to me any more than I care if my kids bother you on the rare occasion that they act out.

Someday, should you procreate, you will see it my way.
 
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That's my point too. There's a time and place for letting your kids act like uncontrollable monsters (read: chuck e cheese) and a time and place for being courteous to everyone else around you. Lambert's is a gray area because the place is already a madhouse, but I stand by my displeasure at normal restaurants where people are trying to enjoy good food and good beer. It's pretty hard to contemplate the complexities of a dark Belgian Dubbel when a three year old child is screaming at the top of his lungs while running around the restaurant with the GI Joe his parents brought with him to play with during dinner. Of course every once in a while he comes over to your table to stare at you while picking his nose.
 
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The reason I said EVEN YOU, is that even great, well behaved kids have a blow up at some point in a public place. There is no controlling it or reigning it in.
No, I'm sorry but if your kids are still young enough that they might blow up then they ARE NOT OLD ENOUGH to be out at restaurants where people are there to eat and enjoy themselves. I don't see it your way because I do not respect your support of irresponsible parenting. If I had kids I would not take them to restaurants when they're young enough to need to move around and play and yell and scream. These are all things kids should be doing. If they can't control themselves for a couple hours while eating dinner with their parents then they should not be taken out. Get a sitter. And if you can't afford a sitter then respect your responsibilities and stay home. Stop being a rude parent and start respecting other people.
 

cheezydemon3

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No, I'm sorry but if your kids are still young enough that they might blow up then they ARE NOT OLD ENOUGH to be out at restaurants where people are there to eat and enjoy themselves. I don't see it your way because I do not respect your support of irresponsible parenting. If I had kids I would not take them to restaurants when they're young enough to need to move around and play and yell and scream. These are all things kids should be doing. If they can't control themselves for a couple hours while eating dinner with their parents then they should not be taken out. Get a sitter. And if you can't afford a sitter then respect your responsibilities and stay home. Stop being a rude parent and start respecting other people.
Well, I am just glad you haven't procreated.

Forget I said anything....actually it looks like you didn't get anything I said anyways.

Cheers!
 

conpewter

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I agree about controlling your kids etc.

As for the food, they have some really good stuff and some so-so stuff. The Chicken fried steak is good, the Ribeye was very good. The ribs... not so much
 

Cape Brewing

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I'll do ya one better....

the Black Dog TAVERN on Martha's Vineyard.... they got all super trendy a few years ago and sold about a billion stupid t-shirts with a black dog on the front of them...

yeah, it's a effin TAVERN... that doesn't serve alcohol. They're located in Vineyard Haven which is a effin DRY section of the Vineyard.

You wanna talk about a royal screw job!?! I almost starting punching throats when I went in there. "Oh, it's the Black Dog Tavern... yeah, this place is legendary... we should do the touristy thing and go in and have a beer" ANNNNTTTT... wrong... no alchohol at all.

it's like going to the "Super Death Defying Roller Coaster Park" only to find out they only have a merry-go-round and kiddy bumper cars.

sonsabitches
 
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As for the food, they have some really good stuff and some so-so stuff. The Chicken fried steak is good, the Ribeye was very good. The ribs... not so much
I got the ribeye. Not impressed at all. If I get a steak it has to pass my "can I grill it like this?" test. If I can grill it better than the restaurant, then they fail. And I'm not a very good grill cook in all fairness. The guy I was with got the fried chicken and he said it was really good so maybe I should have gotten that. Still their menu is barbaric. It's 2010. Put something healthy and delicious on it. But I guess healthy and delicious isn't what their clientèle desire.

I've come the the conclusion that most people living in rural america actually WANT to die of diabetes. And yeah, there were even a couple people there in wheel chairs, legs chopped off from obvious diabetes, gorging their gullets with the same crap that made them like that in the first place.
 

Austin_

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I resented it too and that's what set the tone for the rest of my time there.

Pros:
1. The rolls were good
2. I didn't leave hungry

Cons:
1. They don't serve beer
2. The "pass around" sides are disgusting (macaroni and tomatoes? who the hell would want to eat that?)
3. My steak was mediocre at best. I make better steak on my grill at home
3a. The homemade mashed potatoes tasted like cardboard. The gravy tasted like dog sh!t.
4. It's way too loud to have a conversation
5. Everything but the steak is either deep fried or pan fried. It's impossible to get something healthy that tastes good too
6. They suggested that beer was not conducive to a family-oriented atmosphere
7. The wait staff is overworked
8. Kids everywhere (i know it's to be expected in a gimmicky place like this but hey, it still sucks)
9. A thin, slimy coat of butter is on everything, including the floor which i slipped on
10. Overpriced. Big time.
1) Yeah, they don't serve beer, though the only time I've eaten there (Gulf Shores) I was pretty hung over and didn't care too much.
2) The Mac and Tomatoes threw me off, too. I don't want fruits in my mac n cheese. I want more cheese.
3-4) I had the meatloaf. It was decent enough. Mashed potatoes were average.
5) I don't see a problem with everything being fried.
6) Looking around at the Gulf Shores location, I can imagine a few people not being very family-friendly after a few beers. Nothing like a drunk redneck to ruin dinner.
7) The staff did look pretty over-worked, but they probably make a killing in tips.
8) Like I said, I was in Gulf Shores. Very few restaurants don't have kids.
9) Mmmm, butter.
10) You should have known that walking in.

Health wise it's not the best place. Hell, they don't even know proper grammar, so I can't expect them to know how to eat well.
 

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Well, I think it's sad that you did. I totally got what you said. I just don't agree with you because it's rude.
Let me get this straight:

Besides the bad food - You have your panties in a bunch because *gasp* children were bonkers in a "FAMILY RESTAURANT" that was made famous by throwing food?

Come up for air.
 

jgln

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2. The "pass around" sides are disgusting (macaroni and tomatoes? who the hell would want to eat that?)

I love that combination, even though it is usually stewed tomatoes and ground beef added. I would still very much enjoy the macaroni and tomatoes.
 

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I got the ribeye. Not impressed at all. If I get a steak it has to pass my "can I grill it like this?" test. If I can grill it better than the restaurant, then they fail. And I'm not a very good grill cook in all fairness. The guy I was with got the fried chicken and he said it was really good so maybe I should have gotten that. Still their menu is barbaric. It's 2010. Put something healthy and delicious on it. But I guess healthy and delicious isn't what their clientèle desire.

I've come the the conclusion that most people living in rural america actually WANT to die of diabetes. And yeah, there were even a couple people there in wheel chairs, legs chopped off from obvious diabetes, gorging their gullets with the same crap that made them like that in the first place.

I must retract my Ribeye comment, apparently (according to my wife) I had the pork steak... which was great!

As far as diabetes... i don't know if fried food really affects that, more like heart attacks etc...
 

Darwin18

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I have to agree with the rowdy kids comment. If I'm paying to eat an establishment I don't think its unreasonable to expect a certain level of behavior from everyone, including children.

If you can't control your kids to keep to a reasonable sound level and treat the other customers with respect than you shouldn't have them at the restauarant. Yes having children is hard work and they're hard to control but too bad. You chose to have them, no one forced you to.

Try to look at it from my point of view. I'm paying for a meal and I didn't bring kids to the restauarant so why should I be forced to deal with yours?

My parents and grandparents didn't put up with that crap so why should the rest of us?
 
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I must retract my Ribeye comment, apparently (according to my wife) I had the pork steak... which was great!

As far as diabetes... i don't know if fried food really affects that, more like heart attacks etc...
Being fat affects diabetes. Eating fried food affects being fat.
 

RC0032

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Sorry! Shouldn't have jacked the thread over it, but........I have come to believe that:

A. All kids, even YOU yelled, screamed, cried, and went berserk at some time or twenty.

B. The people raising those kids have SOOOOO much more responsibility and stress than you do, they deserve your patience and understanding at the least.

C. Yelling, screaaming, spanking, or otherwise disciplining those kids in public only makes a bigger scene.

The sound of kids is the sound of a reasonably healthy society. If all the toxins in our environment render us all sterile someday, we will miss the sound of kids.
+1 on 90% of society shouldnt have kids and the 10% that should dont keep them in order :mad:
 

BBKing

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I got the ribeye. Not impressed at all. If I get a steak it has to pass my "can I grill it like this?" test. If I can grill it better than the restaurant, then they fail. And I'm not a very good grill cook in all fairness. The guy I was with got the fried chicken and he said it was really good so maybe I should have gotten that. Still their menu is barbaric. It's 2010. Put something healthy and delicious on it. But I guess healthy and delicious isn't what their clientèle desire.

I've come the the conclusion that most people living in rural america actually WANT to die of diabetes. And yeah, there were even a couple people there in wheel chairs, legs chopped off from obvious diabetes, gorging their gullets with the same crap that made them like that in the first place.
I wish I had your powers of observation.

How is it that you can tell a guy with no legs due to diabetes against a guy with no legs due to, say, a car crash?

Just wondering.
 

jiggs_casey

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No way!! We stopped in there for lunch last year on a motorcycle trip. I thought it was great! The only thing I didn't like was the wait.

Gonna have to back through the photos now... :)
 
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I wish I had your powers of observation.

How is it that you can tell a guy with no legs due to diabetes against a guy with no legs due to, say, a car crash?

Just wondering.
Touché. I assumed diabetes because diabetic neuropathy is the most common source of non-traumatic amputations, but I was making an assumption which is unfounded.
 

springer

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I have found if I don't want to deal with kids I don't go to family restaurants. The beer is a non issue many places that are family orientated don't serve any alcohol. And I love how people with no kids tell others how to raise them... thread = fail
 

Rhoobarb

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Lamberts' is great, especially for the cost. Somebody mentioned $10 per plate being expensive? Are you nuts?! You can't even eat at any of the craptacular meals at McDonald's for under $6-8 anymore.

The wife and I are looking forward to stopping there on our way back from Texas week after next. I could eat those rolls all day. If you really can't go without a beer, go to a bar first, drink up, then go to Lambert's to get 'straightened out'.
 
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I have found if I don't want to deal with kids I don't go to family restaurants. The beer is a non issue many places that are family orientated don't serve any alcohol. And I love how people with no kids tell others how to raise them... thread = fail
Do you think you really need kids to determine whether or not you want them screaming in your face while you try to eat dinner at a restaurant?
 
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Lamberts' is great, especially for the cost. Somebody mentioned $10 per plate being expensive? Are you nuts?! You can't even eat at any of the craptacular meals at McDonald's for under $6-8 anymore.

The wife and I are looking forward to stopping there on our way back from Texas week after next. I could eat those rolls all day. If you really can't go without a beer, go to a bar first, drink up, then go to Lambert's to get 'straightened out'.
The rolls are admittedly good. I must say though I'd much rather pack a picnic lunch and eat on the side of the road than stop and eat at Lambert's. Maybe if one could just buy a dozen rolls to go. That would be reasonable.
 

BeerWars

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Do you think you really need kids to determine whether or not you want them screaming in your face while you try to eat dinner at a restaurant?

I could understand your concern for wild kids while dining if you were at an establishment like Tavern on the Green. But "the only home of throwed rolls"? Don't take yourself so seriously.

You sound like Walt Kowalski.
 

JOHN51277

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I just came across this thread. I grew up in St Louis and we would make the haul over there just for dinner. The food, atmosphere, and throwed rolls were the bomb!

Unless they changed management, or something major in the last 5 years, I think you just had a strangely bad experience!
 

srm775

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I wish I had your powers of observation.

How is it that you can tell a guy with no legs due to diabetes against a guy with no legs due to, say, a car crash?

Just wondering.
No kidding. Being able to tell diabetic neuropathy from all the way across a restaurant by observation alone is pretty impressive.
 

cheezydemon3

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Trolls are admittedly good......
Lol, couldn't help it.

I am just back due to the thumbs up I have recieved for my comments here.

For anyone who admires my comments, PLEASE bear in mind:

I saw an add for a restaraunt in Gulf shores that stated "not a bar, but the clientelle we prefer requests no kids please" or some such ****e.

My first instinct was to take my 3 kids into that place and let them do WHATEVER THE F()CK they wanted.

(I didn't though)

;)
 

conpewter

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Just booked a night at an Inn that doesn't allow kids 10 and under... sounds great! (My wife is a teacher and loves kids... but when you are on vacation you kinda wanna be away from work)
 

cheezydemon3

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Just booked a night at an Inn that doesn't allow kids 10 and under... sounds great! (My wife is a teacher and loves kids... but when you are on vacation you kinda wanna be away from work)
No problem with that at all, in fact.....PUMPKIN WINE?????

HOLY PHUCK! YOU DEGRADED SICKO!!!! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

Lol, even maybe on cruises, kids should be relegated to the disney ones. BUT A RESTARAUNT???

Get over yourself. Play with kids instead of stressing over them, you'll live longer.
 

conpewter

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No problem with that at all, in fact.....PUMPKIN WINE?????

HOLY PHUCK! YOU DEGRADED SICKO!!!! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

Lol, even maybe on cruises, kids should be relegated to the disney ones. BUT A RESTARAUNT???

Get over yourself. Play with kids instead of stressing over them, you'll live longer.
Yeah Pumpkin wine... didn't turn out well...
 
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