Finally!! I can excercise!!

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

I've never been one for excercise machines, or plain old excercise for that matter.

I'm finally getting a workout though! We just bought a new treadmill. It hass all that uppy hill inclining stuff, and pre-programmed workouts........But even better, it has a feature where you can perch an ipad or laptop on the front, and set in a course anywhere in the world covered by Google earth and watch your progress in real time as you walk. It even inclines at the right times to simulate the actual walk. I get to see all those familiar places from the only walks that ever held any real meaning for me.

Long story short....I am busy programming all my favourite walks from any house I ever lived to all my favourite pubs! It's amazing how much incentive it gives you. A big juicy carrot at the end of your excercise. When I get to the pub, I go to the kitchen, ask the imaginary barmaid for a pint, pour myself a beer, compliment the imaginary barmaid on her wonderfully firm imaginary breasts and I am done!! Of course, I don't burn as many calories as I consume, but hell. It's still excercise, right?

Strangely though, it would appear at the moment that I have only programmed walks TO pubs. No staggered trips home yet.

Edit: yeah, I could also walk thru Central park or something.........Let's just get the hang of the whole excercise thing first though, right?

This is the most excercise on a machine that I've ever done!!

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

So, I spect' each programmed walk is equal to the distance from the sofa to the fridge. Huh?

 

[AnonyBrew]

Does it have a cup holder for your beer?

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

Does it have a cup holder for your beer?

It does indeed have a beer holder......But I'm not cheating......Yet.

 

[arturo7]

Strangely though, it would appear at the moment that I have only programmed walks TO pubs. No staggered trips home yet.

Who remembers the trips home anyway?

 

[Marko73]

For the trips home, I recommend 1mph at +5 incline.

My wife recently bought a similar treadmill. Turned out to be a very expensive clothes drying rack and storage shelf.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

My wife recently bought a similar treadmill. Turned out to be a very expensive clothes drying rack and storage shelf.

Yep! There is always that possibility, it has happened before now. :cross:

 

[onthekeg]

I hope you don't get mugged on your stroll through central park.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

I hope you don't get mugged on your stroll through central park.

I did Central Park yesterday. The graphics inside the park didn't work very well. If I met a mugger on google earth I reckon I can take him out, what with half an arm and no head and all that.

 

[Ace_Club]

I had one of those and would always walk throughout the Playboy Mansion. Oddly enough, my arms were always more tired than my legs.

 

[AnOldUR]

What model did you get, the Life Fitness Pup Crawl 2000?

 

[funkapottomous]

You should account for your drunkenness on the return trips.

Get lost a few times, take a few wrong turns, five minute cool down to simulate standing and yelling at a street light, etc.

 

[Ace_Club]

You should account for your drunkenness on the return trips.

Get lost a few times, take a few wrong turns, five minute cool down to simulate standing and yelling at a street light, etc.

He should probably have a potted plant next to the treadmill to simulate peeing in the bushes.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

Well, I once uprooted and carried home a bus stop when I was drunk. I wonder if I can buy a bus stop on Ebay? hmmmmmm

EDIT: Since that night, I found out it was easier, and more rewarding to pick up drunken women.

 

[malkore]

Not quite the same, but there was a company (now bankrupt) that made Expresso stationary bikes for gyms. the bikes were tied to a central server, for tournaments and leaderboards. you signed in and had all these nice tracks available and you got to watch the course (much like a racing simulator console game).

I've wondered many times why Nintendo or Xbox didn't create a similar home device...but your treadmill gives me hope that something might be coming soon!

 

[AnonyBrew]

Maybe they could have a brewing simulation playing while you're on it. That'd be cool. OR why simulate, just figure out a way to hook it up in your brewing process for stirring, pumping, etc.

 

[cfonnes]

If you feel like exercising at night you can move the laptop to the rear of the machine. Your central park jog may be more intense as you are looking over your shoulder at three or four muggers chasing you with pipes and chains.

 

[Laughing_Gnome_Invisible]

if you feel like exercising at night you can move the laptop to the rear of the machine. Your central park jog may be more intense as you are looking over your shoulder at three or four muggers chasing you with pipes and chains.

lMAO!!

 

[BrewForMe]

I hear ya can use the motor in that thing to power your grain mill when you are "done" using it. That gets you two thumbs up!