(At a bar/pay phone)...call the operator...when she answers ask her: "Hello, operator? Can you trace this call and tell me where I am?"
With a "smart" drunk/friend at a bar obviously too drunk say to them: "If you're so smart then what's the difference between an orange?" They may come back and say "between an orange and what?" You say "I'm not repeating myself, just tell me the answer!"