Best News Headlines

[bruce_the_loon]

Really Jack Daniels, you actually think a dog squeak toy will cause your brand damage?

Jack Daniels and dog toy in Supreme Court showdown

The liquor company is arguing that a dog toy infringes on its iconic trademark.

www.bbc.com

 

[balrog]

<wrong thread>

 

[Kent88]

All my nopes

Super-size trapdoor spider discovered in Australia

 

[balrog]

Another nope from Germany:

German monks create world's first powdered beer

A monastic brewery near Munich says it's created the first powdered beer. Just add water, and it'll froth up, complete with a foamy head and full flavor. The result promises massive savings on transport, because it can be shipped at 10% of the weight.

newatlas.com

 

[Northern_Brewer]

This is more like it, glad they worked that one out

Potatoes are better than human blood for making space concrete bricks, scientists say

Charlton Heston was right — blood makes poor mortar (compared to potatoes, anyway).

www.space.com

 

[Kent88]

 

[balrog]

So Windows updates have, in the past, with few exceptions, to be succinct, unmitigated onerous whack a mole exercises in surreal insanity.

I'm *SURE* this can only.....help? "...modernize the OS with AI, faster updates..."

Microsoft plans major platform upgrades for “Windows 12” that will modernize the OS with AI, faster updates, and better security

Windows "CorePC" is the spiritual successor to Windows "Core OS."

www.windowscentral.com

(Maybe the addition of AI will simply have never ending popups to tell users to switch to Linux)

 

[Kent88]

(Maybe the addition of AI will simply have never ending popups to tell users to switch to Linux)

 

[Sailingeric]

Man arrested for ‘chasing pedestrians’ with a stolen forklift, police say​

Man arrested for ‘chasing pedestrians’ with a stolen forklift, police say

Portland police arrested a man after a 911 call reported seeing him drive a stolen forklift while “driving erratically and chasing pedestrians,” according to Central Precinct officers.

www.koin.com

 

[bleme]

Man arrested for ‘chasing pedestrians’ with a stolen forklift, police say​

Man arrested for ‘chasing pedestrians’ with a stolen forklift, police say

Portland police arrested a man after a 911 call reported seeing him drive a stolen forklift while “driving erratically and chasing pedestrians,” according to Central Precinct officers.

www.koin.com

Is Portland OR the new 'Florida Man'?

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Good for Kiwi firefighters for acknowledging the world as it is, not how it might be in theory... I once had a housemate who tried to make onion bhajis - deep fried and everything - after a night out, without having ever made a bhaji before. It didn't go very well, but it's a miracle he didn't burn the house down.

New Zealand: Firefighters release cookbook for drunks

Firefighters have served up a cookbook for heavily intoxicated New Zealanders, hoping to stop befuddled chefs from burning down the kitchen.

www.thesouthafrican.com

The recipes are here - they're nicely written, eg "Release the beans from their tin prison", "Open up the dates down the middle. Ask about their dreams and aspirations."

You're Cooked

Recipes to cook if you're drunk or high

fireandemergency.nz

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Trust the US legal system to make this story even weirder :

Pablo Escobar’s Cocaine Hippos Are Legally People, Says US Judge

A row over whether a group of hippos introduced to Colombia by the cocaine baron should be sterilised and culled has led to the animals being granted “interested persons” status.

www.vice.com

And the latest news from Pablo Escobar's cocaine hippos, is that Colombia is paying $3.5m to move them to Mexico and India :

Drug lord Escobar's hippos in $3.5m move plan

 

[El Whedo]

Winnie The Pooh Escapes Copyright Hell, Grabs Some Weapons, And Immediately Gets Kicked Out Of Hong Kong​

Winnie The Pooh Escapes Copyright Hell, Grabs Some Weapons, And Immediately Gets Kicked Out Of Hong Kong

The life-plus-seventy-years sentence imposed on Winnie the Pooh by Cher’s ex-husband is finally over. Petitions for an early release went unheeded, forcing the butt naked childhood icon to pe…

www.techdirt.com

 

[doug293cz]

Winnie The Pooh Escapes Copyright Hell, Grabs Some Weapons, And Immediately Gets Kicked Out Of Hong Kong​

Winnie The Pooh Escapes Copyright Hell, Grabs Some Weapons, And Immediately Gets Kicked Out Of Hong Kong

The life-plus-seventy-years sentence imposed on Winnie the Pooh by Cher’s ex-husband is finally over. Petitions for an early release went unheeded, forcing the butt naked childhood icon to pe…

www.techdirt.com

Moderator note: This post can stay, as it is a valid news item. However, any discussion of copyright law would need to take place in the "Debate" forum, and any posts in this thread commenting on copyright law will be deleted.

doug293cz
HBT Moderator

 

[sweetcell]

Ukrainian hackers hacked into Russian blogger's AliExpress account and ordered $25,000 worth of dildos instead of drones for the Russian army​

 

[sweetcell]

this one isn't so much about the headline as it is about that second image...

At least 25 cars of a freight train derail in western Montana​

 

[day_trippr]

Great Train Robbery?

 

[pvtpublic]

this one isn't so much about the headline as it is about that second image...

At least 25 cars of a freight train derail in western Montana​

I need to get my a$$ over there! Hey @grampamark wanna join in? Haha

 

[Broken Crow]

Great Train Robbery?

For it to be "Great" the haul should actually have some value.

 

[day_trippr]

Now now, don't be churlish, looking at that crew they probably think it's their Christmas

 

[Northern_Brewer]

"Finally, somewhere we can dump this crap my wife bought without the embarrassment of someone seeing us...wait a minute, who's that guy on the other side of the river with a zoom lens?"

 

[balrog]

Have these eejits never watched a single SciFi movie to know not to do this kind of crap??!!

physicists-simulated-a-black-hole-in-the-lab-and-then-it-started-to-glow

Physicists Simulated a Black Hole in The Lab, And Then It Started to Glow

A synthetic analog of a black hole could tell us a thing or two about an elusive radiation theoretically emitted by the real thing.

www.sciencealert.com

 

[sweetcell]

any engineers out there care to defend this "research"? didn't think so. no more beer for you!

This insect flings pee from a 'butt catapult.' Now engineers are studying practical uses

 

[homebeerbrewer]

“So this moose walks into a medical building...”

 

[bleme]

“So this moose walks into a medical building...”

I saw that video last week and just thought "Someone shoot those idiots that are blocking the exit!"
You could see the moose kept thinking about going that way, then it saw them.
You would think they have never herded an animal in their life or something...

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Blackpool police investigate after man seen pulling seagull with lead

The seagull was rescued by a passer-by but had to be put down after the incident in Blackpool.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[balrog]

The cocaine hippos are back in the news

Offspring of Pablo Escobar's 'cocaine hippos' fatally struck by SUV in Colombia, officials say

No one in the SUV was hurt, Colombian officials said, and the hippo that died was removed to be analyzed.

www.usatoday.com

 

[Northern_Brewer]

As an alternative to cocaine hippos, how about an elephant down the pub?

An Elephant Once Visited Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese Pub

Sat in Dr Johnson's chair.

londonist.com

 

[jschein]

Mets’ SNY broadcasters forced to switch booths in Oakland due to possum poop: ‘Reeked so badly’

There’s apparently a possum living in the visitors’ television booth in Oakland, and it remains on the loose despite stadium staff setting traps along with other efforts to wrangle the …

nypost.com

 

[Kent88]

New Zealand feral cat-killing competition for children axed after backlash

 

[Sailingeric]

When you gotta go! Boston Marathon runner caught pooping in stranger’s yard in doorbell video

 

[Dland]

Seems like a waste, but not that much of one...

'The Champagne of Beers' leaves French producers frothing

The guardians of Champagne will let no one take the name of the bubbly beverage in vain, not even a U.S. beer behemoth. For years, Miller High Life has used the “Champagne of Beers” slogan. At the request of the trade body defending the interests of houses and growers of the northeastern...

news.yahoo.com

 

[Northern_Brewer]

When you gotta go! Boston Marathon runner caught pooping in stranger’s yard in doorbell video

That's nothing, Paula Radcliffe did the same on national TV and still won the 2005 London marathon in the third-fastest time in history.

BBC SPORT | Athletics | Radcliffe shrugs off toilet break

 

[Kent88]

Huh, who knew Daniel Radcliffe's sister was so BA.

 

[shoengine]

Man tries to steal Bremerton ferry with ax for ‘revolution’

 

[Northern_Brewer]

It gets weirder - what this headline misses out is that the cat belonged to the San Marino tourism minister....

Tiberi leaves cycling team after shooting cat dead

Italian Antonio Tiberi and Trek-Segafredo part ways after the 21-year-old shoots dead a minister's cat in San Marino.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Kent88]

 

[Kent88]

 

[jschein]

500 pounds of cooked pasta was dumped along N.J. stream. It’s now a local political issue.

It is unclear if police are investigating the bizarre discovery.

www.nj.com

 

[GrogNerd]

I'd question those in charge of "Spaghetti Night" at the local VFW