A brewer with an alcohol problem

[nvs-brew]

Well I guess this has been a while coming but in a couple of hours I will be taking my 1st real step in admitting and doing something about my addiction to alcohol.. I am an alcoholic!
I will be going to the dr's soon to have a chat and hopefully get a referral to see a councillor.
I've emersed myself pretty deeply into the home brewing scene and am unsure what to do.
Have any of you guys had a similar case and kept brewing? If it comes to it I will sell all my gear and stuff and move on.. I don't want to.. But I can't keep going the way I am.
Anyone else??

 

[Yooper]

Well I guess this has been a while coming but in a couple of hours I will be taking my 1st real step in admitting and doing something about my addiction to alcohol.. I am an alcoholic!
I will be going to the dr's soon to have a chat and hopefully get a referral to see a councillor.
I've emersed myself pretty deeply into the home brewing scene and am unsure what to do.
Have any of you guys had a similar case and kept brewing? If it comes to it I will sell all my gear and stuff and move on.. I don't want to.. But I can't keep going the way I am.
Anyone else??

I had a friend years ago who was an alcoholic and he continued to make wine for many years, until his death. He never touched a drop, and he was sober for 20 years.

I could not do that. I could stop drinking, but not if I was still brewing and surrounded by beer and wine.

The only advice I can give is to put away the brewing gear and get yourself healthy. Your life and health is more important that being immersed in the homebrewing scene. In the future if you can be around homebrewing friends without wanting a sip, that would be great but I would never chance it!

 

[nvs-brew]

Yeah I will starting some sport next week and I guess you right.. Maybe I should pack it all away for a while.
Bad time for us with competitions and events.. But now has to be the time..
How do you guys drink without going over board? How do you know when to stop? I need to find that switch!

 

[Yooper]

Yeah I will starting some sport next week and I guess you right.. Maybe I should pack it all away for a while.
Bad time for us with competitions and events.. But now has to be the time..
How do you guys drink without going over board? How do you know when to stop? I need to find that switch!

I think it's different for people like me who drink strictly for the taste (seriously). I actually hate the feeling of being "buzzed" and so don't usually over-imbibe at all.

I can drink 0, or 1, or 2, (or more), and it's all good for me. But I don't have any things I need, like cigarettes or medications or foods. I don't even overeat. I really think it's a personality/body type of thing. Some of my friends do EVERYTHING over the top- eat too much, drink too much, work too much, etc. It's just not part of my make up to do that.

Through your counselor and doctor, you can find out more about yourself and why you do what you do. Admitting that you have a problem is definitely the first step, so that's a great feat right there!

 

[soccerdad]

Best wishes in beating the addiction nvs. You are brave to make the statement here and obviously strong. Stay strong.

 

[nvs-brew]

I'm reaching out a bit to you guys atm as I don't feel I can to all my brew crew and mates who know me more.
It feels good to let it out to like minded people.

 

[brettg20]

I have definitely gone overboard with drinking my fair share, and I find taking a break for a few weeks very helpful, but that's just me. My family is full of alcoholics, so I'm very observant of my antics. Good luck to you, admitting a problem is key to finding a solution.

 

[EcuPirate07]

I think it's just one of those things where it's in your DNA wether you can or can't control your urges. My wife's dad is a huge alcoholic and once drug addict. She and her sisters tell me stories where they would pull them outta bed at 3am to take them around town to find their next hit. Her dad has tried multiple times to kill himself with no success. And honestly everyone feels like their life would be better if he did take his life. He is so far gone the point of no return he is just a drain on society and his daughters lives (think of 2am phone calls telling your daughters that you just slit your wrist just for attention). Once his father died he spiraled outta control. He can't live on his own bc no one can trust him to not spend all his money on alcohol instead of groceries. He is a 58 year old living in a nursing home.

I guess my point is I don't know you or how bad your addiction is but there are so much more important things in life then drinking. At least you have recognized that you have a problem and are asking for help. That's the hardest step. If no one else tells you, I just wanna say I'm proud of you and don't give up! There will always be someone here to listen, we are our own crazy family in a way. Good luck with your endeavors.

 

[PhinneyWoodBrews]

First off, I want to commend you for the courage it takes to admit alcohol has become a problem for you, though I don't know you personally, I'm glad you're taking steps to address it. I'm a bartender, and I've seen the effects of alcohol abuse up close among co-workers and customers alike. My significant other loves beer and used to brew with me when I was just starting out. She's also been a bartender for almost ten years, and a couple years ago she reached a point with her drinking habits that were no longer sustainable. Drinking had taken over her life. She sought treatment, and has been sober for a year and a half. She's much healthier and happier, and though she misses beer, for right now she is content to not drink. I agree with Yooper: Focus on your health, get the support you need, and don't worry about whether you'll be able to brew again. That doesn't have to be decided today. Put your energy into taking care of yourself. Best wishes, you can do it.
-Alex

 

[CUrchin]

Call your councilor or doctor now- Leave a message if you have to. And call again tomorrow if they don't call you back. Don't put it off. It's too important.

 

[madscientist451]

I drink one, two or three beers a night, sometimes none. Its usually spaced out over 4-6 hours, I don't even feel buzzed, I never get really drunk, can't stand hangovers. Do I have a drinking problem? I don't think so, others would say I do have one, but that is usually someone that doesn't drink at all. You have to decide for yourself if your drinking is causing problems in your life. No one else can decide that, no one is going to solve your problems, you have to decide on your own. It sounds like you already have decided to make a change. So congratulations, you have crossed a bridge, now you have to go further.
If you can't drink a beer without drinking more until you are intoxicated, you need to quit, now and forever. If you don't, your health will decline along with many other problems.
Sorry for the rambling answer, trying to help, not judging, wish you the best.

 

[Rhumbline]

I'll also add my well wishes.

Some folks can control their drinking and stop at just one or two. Some need to abstain totally.

Take 90 days and see if you can go without booze. If not, then you've certainly got an issue that needs addressing.

There are a lot of good programs out there, I pray that you'll find one that works for you.

 

[brew703]

Good luck to you.

My brother in law is an alcoholic but has yet to admit he has a problem. He doesn't brew but drinks every chance he gets. He drinks hot or cold beer, sucks them down one after the other.

Family gatherings are no longer enjoyable because he drinks until he passes out.
I've told my wife she needs to get involved but he doesn't want help.

It's sad and I hope he doesn't kill someone when he is under the influence.

The first step is admitting you have a problem then getting help. You are on the right track. Good luck.

 

[Gonefishing]

Deciding you have a problem and taking the steps to do something about it are huge.It takes strength to do that, even more to admit it publically as you have done. You'll need that strength to reach your goal, and it looks to me like you have that. Work on getting healthy, then, like everyone else said, make your decision abour brewing, don't worry about it now.

 

[Qhrumphf]

I will say, I think alcoholism is a real elephant in the world amongst the beer world, craft drinkers, craft brewers, and homebrewers. And I think there are many who use "I drink for the taste" as a rationalization for their heavy drinking. Now, at the same time I reject the "if you have more than 2 drinks a day you're an alcoholic" as I believe the level is different for everyone. But the point is, I think it's more widespread than people want to admit, and I commend you for admitting that you think you have a problem.

I will also say, while I'm very much comfortable with the amount I drink and I don't see a problem there, speaking to my other past addictions, I don't think trying to find a switch for moderation was going to work. That may be my own personality and others may see it differently or have a different experience, but I had to completely remove myself from that world. More than 10 years later, being around any of it still makes me incredibly uncomfortable, and had I not cut ties and removed those elements completely from my life, I may never have stopped and who knows where I'd be at this point. I guess what I'm trying to say is in your shoes, I personally would not be able to try and drink in moderation, especially not at first, and I wouldn't have been able to brew either. Again, others may experience it differently. But your health is number one, and if you think you need to make some wholesale changes to your life, you need to do what you need to do.

 

[Cyclman]

I don't think it is what you want to hear, but if you are an addict, zero tolerance is important. Some people simply can't stop, and drink well beyond any reasonable standard. Even after treatment, they may go a long time sober, then dive back in to the darkest depths in their first "slip." Ultimately, it will destroy your life if you are an addict that can't overcome. Not to mention the end of your life will be sooner and rather miserable. I have had dear friends in this situation, it is tough. Some eventually overcame, others still fighting.

If you have found this in yourself, congrats, few addicts have the ability to recognize their problem and do the work to address it.

I have also had friends who took an extended time off from booze, got treatment for the alcohol and non-alcohol issues in their life, then went back to a pattern of healthy-moderate drinking. In my thinking, they weren't addicts, they had problems drowned in alcohol.

Those who I know were successful relied on lots of outside help. This is difficult to impossible to do without help, lots of it.

Best of luck, I hope this works out wonderfully for you. I have had issues in my life, some tough ones, and I will say, whatever happens, don't give up. If you dry out then slip, get back on. One day at a time is wonderful advice with any challenge you are working to overcome. Sometimes people try to overburden themselves with achieving perfection- perfection doesn't happen, all we can do is strive with all of our ability.

 

[nvs-brew]

Thanks for the kind words.
I think having support and sharing is going to be my best start.
Dr's done and I am now going to alcohol/drug councillor as soon as the refferel is actioned.
I started a fairly big home brew page for my capital city (800+ members so far) and have made a lot of mates from this and brewing and even the craft beer scene in the last 5 or so years..
I very rarely secret drink but you would find me with a beer in my hand pretty much all the time when I'm not at work..
I guess I'm hoping there is a chance I could cut down to weekend evenings and have people around me to tell me to "stop" and letting them know that I take things overboard, that would be an ideal situation.
Getting out and doing some sport and talking about it is my 1st person step.. And I'm making that happen!

I like what you have all said and again
Thanks!!

 

[Hello]

I really wish you well. I think whatever advice you get from the counselor will be good and you should follow it. I am unsure that I personally could or would want to rely on my friends to moderate my intake if I truly felt there was an issue. I'm unsure I would want to touch a drink if I were where you're at now. Admitting there is an issue but making provisions to continue to drink seems counterproductive. It is not to say it doesn't work, but if you've come to the realization that there is a problem, then I would step away from the problem.

You may lose contacts with the people in your groups, but you won't lose friends if they're true friends. Those people who you call friends should be able to remain friends with you even if you're not brewing or drinking. I hope that there are some good ones in that group, you'll want your friends around.

Good luck to you though. That's a huge step and I hope you find the help you need.

 

[Newsman]

Congrats on taking the first step. The MOST important step is to admit you have a problem. Alcoholism runs in my family. Somehow I seem not to have been overly affected by it. I don't drink to excess. Mainly one or two glasses a night. Like Yooper, I don't like feeling "drunk." I like getting feeling relaxed like a glass or two of beer / cider makes me feel, but more than that and I don't like it.
As others have said, if you give up alcohol for 90 days or so and can go back without feeling the need to overdo it, you should be fine to get back into brewing, but if you can't, my advice would be to get rid of all your brewing gear and don't get back into it.

 

[bbohanon]

I'll also add my well wishes.

Some folks can control their drinking and stop at just one or two. Some need to abstain totally.

Take 90 days and see if you can go without booze. If not, then you've certainly got an issue that needs addressing.

There are a lot of good programs out there, I pray that you'll find one that works for you.

Same here in wishing you luck and at least you have acknowledged the problem. Now you just have to tackle it.

I had this happen when I first got into home brewing and my batches started to really get better and I was drinking 4-5 beers a night some nights even more..My wife quickly told me that I had 3 options...Option A was to learn to drink what I am making in a much more controlled fashion, or Option B, quit the hobby altogether.

Option C was no wife and as luck would have it, I really love the woman so that was not an option for me.

I quickly curbed my drinking big time and now I only have 1-3 beers a week max..sometimes none at all but I still brew quite a bit.

I have alot of friends , family and co-workers who happily take it off my hands so I dont have alot that stays around for long. I usually end up keeping 2 gallons max of every 10 I make..

I have grown to appreciate the process of brewing much more than I do consuming it.

I hope you get it figured out as this hobby is not worth ruining your lifelong relationships with loved ones for.

 

[k1ngl1ves]

Yeah I will starting some sport next week and I guess you right.. Maybe I should pack it all away for a while.
Bad time for us with competitions and events.. But now has to be the time..
How do you guys drink without going over board? How do you know when to stop? I need to find that switch!

Everyone is different with alcohol. Hard liquor? I'll drink an entire 1.75L in about 4 hours. That's bad. Real bad, considering I'm 6' and only 170lbs. I haven't drank hard liquor in almost 4 years. Hardest thing I ever did was breaking up with my Vodka. I don't miss being sick though.

After about 6 months of sobriety, I continued to brew beer again. I drink about 6-7 beers a week, sometimes less. Never had a problem with beer and limiting myself. I take one shot of hard liquor though... and it's off to the races! I don't know where I'll be in the morning, but I probably won't be able to find my pants! Lol!

I feel as though I'm lucky. I haven't had to change my lifestyle very much, and can still be around the same people I've enjoyed my life with so far without struggles. Just no hard liquor.

My mother-in-law, on the other hand, can't sit at a table with someone who is drinking a beer. She'll stare at the bottle the whole time and not talk. For me, that has a few advantages! Lol!




Good luck, OP! It's a tough road ahead, but just take it one instance at a time. You've got this.

 

[Grannyknot]

First off, best of luck to you, and its fantastic that you are able to recognize a potential problem before it spirals out of control to the point of total denial.

About 2 years ago, I began noticing a slight dependence on alcohol as well. I always had my "after work beer" which usually led to 3-4 more beers. If I didn't pour a beer as soon as I got home, I began to crave it. What was even more shocking was the rate that I could drink a beer. Knowing that signs of a future issue were showing themselves, I decided I needed to take this seriously.

I really enjoyed brewing, but I knew that a doctor or counselor would advise me to stop the hobby and get rid of all my equipment. So I decided I would tackle this myself. My first step was to limit myself to 2 beers a night, which was pretty easy. My wife took over the outdoor cooking duties. After work, rather than go straight home and set myself up for the routine 1st beer pour, I would go swim at the pool, ride my mountain bike, or something else to keep me from going home and plopping down on the couch with a beer.

After a while, I began to drink only 1 beer a night. This was the hardest step for me. I failed many times, but never let it get me down. The key was to avoid that beer as soon as I got home. Stretch the night out as far as I could without having my 1 beer. Exercising after work really helped this. Not sure why, but I never craved a beer after I got home from some sort of work out.

Once I had conquered 1 beer a night, I moved on to having 1 every other night, which really wasn't that hard. I like to think it is because I had taken away my bodies dependency. Now I can go an entire week without so much as thinking about it. When friends come over, I can drink 3 or 4 and the next day not drink any.

Good luck. You can do it.

 

[Mismost]

Good Luck man! Forty years ago, I realized I had a drinking problem. I was young, in the Army, and surrounded by heavy drinkers. I never drank to just enjoy a drink, I drank to get drunk and was very good at that!

Back home after the Army, it continued. At first it was only on the week ends, but then it was happening more often. It did affect my work and home life. I decided that I would try to never have more than two drinks and never drink two days in a row. I have stuck to that motto for the most part of the last 40 years. Turned into a Yooper...I just drink for taste! It has worked for me.

I am me and you are you...get help with your problem. Find what works for you, that will make your life better! Got you on my prayer list.

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

I think it's different for people like me who drink strictly for the taste (seriously). I actually hate the feeling of being "buzzed" and so don't usually over-imbibe at all.

This. I know my limit because I do not like being drunk. Does not feel good to me. I enjoy the beer for what it is. Have never been one to knock them back in a series. I take my time while drinking and stop when i feel a buzz coming on.

 

[DrunkleJon]

Its good that you recognize that you have a problem. As for advice, only you can tell the extent of your alcohol problem. The only thing I can say is at the very least cease drinking entirely so that you can work on any underlying issues. Get yourself mentally healthy as well as remove the temptation entirely before deciding if you are going to attempt to re-start with moderation.

You are not the first from here to make this realization. You will not be the last. I commend you for coming to this realization.

 

[firerat]

I don't have much to add other than to say good for you to identify you have a problem.

It's not an easy thing to do.

 

[Jhoss]

Being a Yooper, (transplanted to SE Mich) I tried to follow the Yooper motto of taking the summer off drinking (the summer lasts two weeks in the UP)...just a joke..we can still joke eh?

But seriously folks, being bombarded with commercials, easy access to cheap alcohol, every social event comes with alcohol... makes that an easy trap to fall into.

@NVS - you are well on your way to treating beer as "just good food" (my motto). I wish you high-hopes in your transition and I think you'll get there!

 

[SanPancho]

alcohol is not the problem. that would be a hardware issue. unless you're having tremors, delusions, vomiting, nausea, bloated, yellowing, etc. then you're not addicted to alcohol.

which means its a problem with your software- i.e. you. do the program, talk to counselor, therapist, psychiatrist. etc. you have a bug in your operating system- you use alcohol to fix an error in your programming. could be anything, maybe its buried deep down inside and you have no idea, or its just simmering beneath the surface and you dont want to address it. low self esteem/loneliness/anger/trauma/abuse/ mental health issues/etc. whatever the problem, drugs/alcohol are just minor workarounds you use for temporary relief. the only way to truly solve the problem is to do a full reinstall. or if your case isnt too severe, maybe some heavy patching/service pack update/etc.

if you can figure out your problem and really do the hard work to solve it, there's no reason you cant learn to drink responsibly when you come back to it. forever abstaining from alcohol diminishes the human experience. imagine life without eating good food, falling in love, having adventures, having sex. all of which can be "addictions" if you want them to be. abstaining is cheating- you're not fixing the real problem, and you're cheating yourself out of a full life.

on a side note- if you're game to really do the work to fix everything, look into new research about psylocibin mushrooms and mdma/ecstasy with addiction treatment. as opposed to addictive upper/downer drugs, these are expansionary drugs. takes your mind to new places and new points of view (shrooms) or brings all the emotions up and lets you freely talk about them and feel them with meaning (mdma). if you've always felt a bit "off" or "different" and think that's a reason you drink, these kinds of mind experiences can be a fast track to getting to the root of the problem. if you go this route, be sure to follow safety procedures (light sedatives, experienced/professional attendant watching over you, etc) if you're not already experienced with these.

good luck.

 

[Cheesy_Goodness]

Good luck to the OP on this one. It can't be an easy thing but it sounds like it's a necessity at this point.

If you're looking for some more insight from homebrewers, this thread might be of some help. If you don't think you need a 0 tolerance policy (or more accurately, your therapist doesn't think so), one thing I think most people there found to help curb the craving was to keep busy at times you would normally drink. Is your routine to start drinking right after work? Go for a jog instead. And you can't tell me there's not a few dozen projects that have been lying around just waiting to be completed

In all honesty, it only took a few days for me to start feeling better, and that made it much easier in the following days.

Again, good luck to you and I hope you find a good solution.

 

[johngaltsmotor]

Hi nvs-brew. You deserve a lot of credit for stating the uncomfortable truth. And hopefully the comradery that this forum shares in enjoying beer will also share in supporting your desire to improve your situation.

I have fought the temptation for my addictive personality to latch onto alcohol by brewing less frequently and rarely exceeding 5% batches. (Granted, I also make sausage and you call tell by looking at my physique that I have no conquered my addictive personality, only compartmentalized it.)
Having seen immediate family go from extensive opioid abuse to nothing stronger than Tylenol I know that drastic changes are possible. And while you may be hesitant to make your condition known locally, you should find at least one close friend to confide in. Just like having a sponsor, knowing that you can call in the reserves when you need to vent or a kick in the pants to motivate you can make a huge difference.
Good luck.

 

[jrgtr42]

Thanks for the kind words.
I think having support and sharing is going to be my best start.
Dr's done and I am now going to alcohol/drug councillor as soon as the refferel is actioned.
I started a fairly big home brew page for my capital city (800+ members so far) and have made a lot of mates from this and brewing and even the craft beer scene in the last 5 or so years..
I very rarely secret drink but you would find me with a beer in my hand pretty much all the time when I'm not at work..
I guess I'm hoping there is a chance I could cut down to weekend evenings and have people around me to tell me to "stop" and letting them know that I take things overboard, that would be an ideal situation.
Getting out and doing some sport and talking about it is my 1st person step.. And I'm making that happen!

I like what you have all said and again
Thanks!!

All the best of luck and health to you.
If I may, for now, table the idea of being able to cut down. If you have a problem, you need to cut it out entirely. In fact, I may recommend finding someone that you could even store all your brewing gear at their house so the temptation, no matter how slight, is removed. (or sell it outright.)
You may eventually get to the point of having one once in a while, but it's not something to be expected at this point.