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Obnoxious Football Trash Talk Thread

Discussion in 'Drunken Ramblings and Mindless Mumbling' started by Cape Brewing, Aug 14, 2009.

 

  1. Airborneguy

    Adjunct of the Law  

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    How about showing them the Patriots videos of everyone else? Maybe scare the Aliens into thinking the Patriots were taping them too?
     
  2. Randall

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    Just don't show them Tom Brady's ugg commercial, they would slaughter us all if they had to watch that garbage.
     
  3. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    This is obnoxious and false right? Right?!? Only chicks where those up here where its actually cold.
     
  4. bluemoose

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    Yeah, but don't you guys still wear bell bottoms and flannel? Not exactly on the cutting edge of fashion up there.
     
  5. Bernie Brewer

    Grouchy Old Fart

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    Hmmm. The same guy that believes the Pats are awesome also believes we are gonna be attacked by space aliens. You better get that tinfoil off your head- it is leaching toxins into your brain......
     
  6. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 2, 2012
    Bell bottoms are so back in. I'm sporting mine right now. Goes well with my lamb chop sideburns and rapist mustache.
     
  7. Randall

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    If you were down here in SoCal during the chargers pats game you would have seen it almost every commercial break. It could have been giselle or Justin bieber though hard to tell since they all look the same.
     
  8. Randall

    Well-Known Member

  9. Cape Brewing

    DOH!!! Stupid brewing...  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    They're the freakin' 1 seed coming out of the AFC. How much better do they have to be for you?? Undefeated??

    And I'M the one with tin foil in my head? I think the frozen tundra has flozen the blood flow to your brain a bit.
     
  10. Bernie Brewer

    Grouchy Old Fart

    Posted Jan 3, 2012

    Hey I was just following the thread rules. I was being obnoxious. :p
    And I didn't say you had tin foil IN your head. You had it ON your head. you know, like warding off the aliens???? Yeesh do I hafta explain EVERYTHING to you???
     
  11. bluemoose

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    Wait, so what does tin foil have to do with football? No wonder you guys haven't won a championship in like...

    11 months.
     
  12. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    Back to the Ugg commercials. Brady has to do one of those Modern Warfare commercials like Jonah Hill & Sam Worthington. Here's the setup: Tom's throwing the long ball at Iranian missiles as they are launched over the Strait of Hormuz making them go off course saving the oil tankers. Welker's riding them so he's got a familiar target. He'll need some dirt on his face though.

    This should offset the fuzzy booties endorsement and get him his man card back from Giselle. Plus, just stop hanging around with the uppity NY fashion crowd. Makes you go down water slides all silly.
     
  13. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    tell me, how'd that work out for you last year?
     
  14. Cape Brewing

    DOH!!! Stupid brewing...  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    Blah blah blah
     
  15. AZ_IPA

    PKU  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    About as good as a 40% barley whiskey? :p
     
  16. Bulls Beers

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012

    This coming from a bunch of people who wear stupid cheese on their head...:drunk:
     
  17. Cape Brewing

    DOH!!! Stupid brewing...  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    "brandy" jagoff. At least get it right.

    And that's still gonna work once I stop being lazy and fed up with it
     
  18. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    you're stupid.
     
  19. Scruffy1207

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    I think bulls has a point there.
     
  20. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    i think moto has a point there.
     
  21. bluemoose

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    I think Moto's cheese hat is too tight.
     
  22. Cape Brewing

    DOH!!! Stupid brewing...  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    I think Moto bangs squirrels
     
  23. D_Ranged_Eskimo

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    Don't hate on Title Town. They're the real 'America's Team!'
     
  24. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    He likes letting 'em lick the cheese out of his dick.
     
  25. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    always one step over the funny/creepy line.

    you're like the half-tard from road trip. or like the_bird from hbt.
     
  26. wildwest450

    Banned

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    He freezes them first so they don't laugh.


    _
     
  27. Bulls Beers

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012

    Ahh, Sorry Mr Moto, I didn't mean to tease the cheese....Bwhahahaha!
     
  28. olllllo

    []-O-[]  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    NMockTheBelt Suh,
    Since the taunt, Oh and Two,
    What's a crybaby to do?
     
  29. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 3, 2012
    Yep. When indigenous Eskimos from TX speak it, you know it's true. :)
     
  30. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
  31. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    Gregg Easterbrook is a pompous douchenozzle.

    I don't watch much (any, really) college football, and tonight reminded me why. Had the Sugar Bowl on, more-or-less in the background while I surfed. Virginia Tech's got the ball in the first quarter, first-and-goal at the 4 yard line.

    Rushing play. Running back got tackled back at the 26 (and that was a *generous* spot, it was really the 29).

    How the **** do you take a 22-yard loss on a first-down running play? Worst play I've seen not involving Tim Tebow in YEARS. Like, it looked like he was TRYING to make a Tebow play, instead of just taking the two-yard loss and having... oh, second and goal from the 6?

    Animated GIF here:

    ANIMATED: David Wilson Runs The Wrong Way In Sugar Bowl - SB Nation Detroit

    Worst play I've seen in YEARS, from any level of football. And this was from the best running back on one of the teams deemed to be among the twenty or so best? Holy****.

    [​IMG]

    EDIT: Oh, and apparently this guy's considered a first-round draft pick. Good luck with that.
     
  32. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    You know, those Michigan defenders really should have just let him keep running. There were like five of them converging on him. They should have just kept chasing him, like you "chase" your two-year old around the house. Dumbass running back would have run back through his own end zone if they'd have let him.
     
  33. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    Oh, and I'm calling something else right now.

    Peyton Manning to the Denver Broncos in the offseason.

    Makes absolutely no sense for the Colts to pay Peyton that much money when from all accounts, Andrew Luck is ready to play right away. They have far, far too many holes across the whole team, by the time they get them fixed, Peyton will be retired anyway. New GM, they're going to completely turn over that roster, and they can't do that paying Peyton $28M and Andrew Luck how even many millions he commands.

    And, they can't *not* draft Luck.

    Pretty clear that Tebow's not the answer in Denver, at least at QB. But, what QB's going to want to sign there? Who's going to want to be replacing Football Jesus? Matty Flynn goes there, the first time he throws two picks they'll be taking out billboards to get him benched.

    The only QB that might be available who's got the gravitas to send Tebow to the bench, or to a new position?

    Manning.

    And, Denver's not that far off from being pretty damn good. Running backs are as tough as any I've seen all year. Defense is good. Put a real QB out there, they could be a helluva good squad.

    Either put Tebow at H-back/tight-end (if that self-righteous bastard's ego will allow), or trade him to Jacksonville.
     
  34. Airborneguy

    Adjunct of the Law  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    I don't know about that Peyton call. Word is, Irsay made those moves yesterday because he disgreed with them regarding Peyton. He wants Peyton to stay and will hire a GM who agrees with him on that.
     
  35. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    neither. superbowl will be saints over (unfortunately) steelers.

    watching our d-line is just embarrassing. and did I see that Raji was in the pro bowl? for what?? his league-dominating 3 sacks??
     
  36. motobrewer

    I'm no atheist scientist, but...

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    dumbest commentary i've ever seen. and I only read about 5 words total.
     
  37. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    I'm sorry, I'll try and write more monosymbolically for you in the future.
     
  38. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    Manning will be in san francisco next year if not a Colt and has a say in it. Defense is already SB caliber. All he wants is more titles and want nothing to do with rebuilding program
     
  39. the_bird

    10th-Level Beer Nerd  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    Denver wouldn't be a rebuilding program. If a healthy Manning was on the Broncos this year, they'd have this weekend off as one of the top-2 seeds in the AFC.

    I can see some Elway-Manning parallels. How much do you think it just absolutely pains John Elway to watch Tim Tebow "quarterback" that team? How much would he push for Manning, one of the only QBs that could come in and really take the reins away from the Baby Jesus?

    Denver's a really, really good team outside of... well, the most important position on the field. It's a great D, and those running back... damn. Looks like they're stopped, and they end up with eight-yard gains. Add Manning and a couple pieces here and there (a playmaker or two; Reggie Wayne?), and they're one of the most balanced, elite teams in the league.

    San Fran? Maybe... but I thought they were pretty much committed to Alex Smith at this point? That's be ironic, the guy FINALLY has a decent season and THEN he loses his job.
     
  40. DesertBrew

    Dirty blonde  

    Posted Jan 4, 2012
    One of the ESPN talking heads brought up SF on Mike & Mike this morning so I take no credit :eek:. It did sound brilliant. Denver or SF both would be a nice fit. Houston was also mentioned.

    I still keep thinking about GB racking up 49 on Denver's D though. And with SF schedule it's really hard to figure out if their D is that good or just crappy competition. I still think Smith is given only enough reign to not lose the game. Playoffs will tell the real story.

    Guess it depends if you want ocean and wine country or mountainous retreats for skiing. I'd live in either one of those cities and let Indy move on rebuilding.
     
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