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Men who sit to pee

Discussion in 'General Chit Chat' started by Hophunter, Aug 13, 2015.

 

  1. paulthenurse

    Fecal Transplant Super Donor

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    You're like a friggin' bat. Count Pissah.
     
  2. soccerdad

    Mama Tried  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I'm not sure who moderates the next debate but I sure as hell hope somebody asks this Q of the Donald
     
  3. drainbamage

    Keep HBT weird.

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Now, the real trick is peeing down the inside of the bowl--in the dark--so it makes less noise.
     
  4. smurfjuice

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I just put my foot in the bowl and pee down my leg ... :rockin:
     
    drainbamage, Jcruse, JayDog and 2 others like this.
  5. moreb33rplz

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I intentionally piss a little on the seat and floor to mark my territory.
     
  6. GHBWNY

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Hope the neighbors don't mind.
     
    drainbamage likes this.
  7. wardens355

    Supporting Member  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Haha. This reminds me of a fond memory... a bunch of us were toilet papering houses early in high school and I had to drop a wicked deuce. At first I was like, ah crap, I gotta go super bad, what am I going to do? Then I looked at the toilet paper, looked at a downed tree in someones backyard, looked at TP, looked at tree... Feel bad for whichever family member had to encounter that in the next few days.
     
  8. Tin4

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    How else would you gain super powers? People with full hearing (i.e, Me) don't have super powers and if they did it would be laser vision. It would only be good provided DVD stays the format for some time to come but man that would be sweet.

    I would be happy to do that provided they only debated elementary school cafeteria food.
     
  9. paulthenurse

    Fecal Transplant Super Donor

    Posted Aug 14, 2015

    Your foot is only 8 inches from the tip of your three inch kahk you little blue badtid.
     
  10. cannman

    Beer Theorist

    Posted Aug 14, 2015

    I prefer to deuce on the clock. +1
     
    BigJack likes this.
  11. Silentdrinker

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Homie, you either have a fire hose dong or you should consider not having carpet in the bathroom.
     
    cannman, Johnnyhitch1 and The_Bishop like this.
  12. BigJack

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    When I was younger and worked an hourly job, a dump on the clock was one of life's great pleasures.

    Not that I am salary, not so much. I've gotten to the point in life that I need to bond with my depository. It's all about home waters or at least friendly confines.

    There is only one restroom on campus that I'm comfortable taking the Browns to the Superbowl in and, sadly, it is down stairs from my classroom. Bad teachers' lounge snacks can really make for uncomfortable dashes down the stare case.
     
  13. cannman

    Beer Theorist

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I'm actually more concerned with people knowing the amount of tp i'm using when in a public restroom... hate it when the roll is just *SqEEEEeeek*
     
    Gonefishing likes this.
  14. JayDog

    Supporting Member  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I'm at the age where I will drop a deuce anywhere. Now in my younger days I would never crap anywhere but home. But I would take really long naps in the can at work. Then walk out shaking my head and rubbing my stomach.
    As for sitting, I have never even heard of another man sitting to pee. Sorry momma didn't raise that type of boy. And I was the only one in the house.
     
    cannman likes this.
  15. Mer-man

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    And if he had to, he would do it in half the time normally used!;)
     
  16. Psylocide

    Ippons for Days

    Posted Aug 14, 2015

    This. It's like the worst method to run out the clock.

    I usually shut my office door and do Internet stuff with metal blasting.



    Sent from my iPhone... while pooping.
     
    cannman and Johnnyhitch1 like this.
  17. Funkychef

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Im a standing guy. No need to sit. Unless ive got to snap a tosca. Nothing better then going outside and cutting loose at anything that crosses my path after a couple of brews. As a young fellow I hated public bathrooms and would hold it till i got home. Now I will go anywhere without hesitation.
     
  18. GHBWNY

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Re: the original post, I can't remember the last time I sat to pee, but I suspect it had to be when I was being potty-trained. Performing that feat while standing at 2 years old simply wasn't an option. Since then, it has been an option and, God willing, always will be.

    Now I'm at that age where I pee at around 4:00 every morning. Problem is, I don't get up til 5:00.
     
    Fedora and kombat like this.
  19. Cheesy_Goodness

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    This.

    For me it's more time friendly to stand and give the seat a quick wipe every few trips, but this reason alone makes a good case for sitting.
     
  20. vincentAlpha

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Yea gotta agree with @HopHunter here. I stand and use urinals outside the home (but I'll still sit at the 'work bathroom' if I've no choice cause when you go to the same spot multiple times a day and the janitorial staff cleans about once a year... MUN is disgusting) but otherwise sit cause that splashback goes EVERYWHERE. Its hard to tell until you've got something nearby enough to see it but I've had shower curtains about 4-6" away from the toilet get a good coating when someone stands and that is just nasty.
     
  21. cannman

    Beer Theorist

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    However.........

    I did throw out my back once sitting to poop. True story (although I have a trick back, usually while doing dishes, serious). I had to go, rushed in there, made the bowl by like a spit second... couldn't get back up! So because of this, you should limit the number of times you sit and piss... save the injury for that turd that will keep you laid out for two weeks. Wisdom speaking here...
     
  22. Tin4

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I went opposite. I now look forward to using the restroom in new and exotic places.

    Yeah, there's a point in most people's lives where you stop caring about what everyone thinks and just live your life. I'm getting there.

    Well when you're job ends when your work is done you actually do yourself a disservice.

    Can I ask how old you are? I was staying in a hotel room with my dad. Got up to pee at 4. He heard me get up and chuckled "Welcome to getting old.".

    I was all "Go back to sleep old man or I'll smother you. I'll do it!".

    I hurt my back now doing mundane and everyday task. I dropped the mail, bent over to get it, back pain for a week.
     
    cannman likes this.
  23. Psylocide

    Ippons for Days

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Yeah, well... I basically need to be here in case anything "urgent" would come up.

    So, there's that.
     
    Austin likes this.
  24. GilaMinumBeer

    Half-fast Prattlarian  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I am more concerned I will plug the toilet with all the paper.
     
  25. cannman

    Beer Theorist

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I have been there.

    I also hate the auto flush feature. Move the wrong way and I could easily make it a three flusher before i'm ready to REALLY flush. makes me look like some kind of as$hole.
     
  26. GilaMinumBeer

    Half-fast Prattlarian  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Ha. I hate the autoflush valves that won't flush lest you get off the pot.

    I use a lot of paper. Wish this country had accommodations for washing instead.
     
  27. Hophunter

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015

    Two things sad here, 1. Lack of overall reading comprehension. 2. Both bathrooms were tile floor and bleach was needed to remove the smell from the underlying concrete. The other subfloor totally removed.
     
    cannman likes this.
  28. GilaMinumBeer

    Half-fast Prattlarian  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Sounds more like those fixtures had a faulty wax ring that allowed leaching, coupled with someone who didn't care if the stream went ion the toilet or on it.

    I have been standing to pee my entire life and have NEVER had this experience despite having two children with horrible aim.

    But, then again, we clean the toilet rooms every weekend with the normal house cleaning routine.
     
  29. firerat

    F-You I'm Drunk  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    For those that sit down to pee and just to pee, when did you first realize that you were a woman and have you told your family yet?
     
    Austin and Stealthcruiser like this.
  30. GHBWNY

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Perfect explanation, especially having soaked into the subfloor. Sometimes when Mr. DIY notices a leak coming out from under the toilet, instead of pulling the toilet and replacing the wax ring, he grabs a caulk gun and "seals" around the base of the toilet. This only exacerbates the problem, forcing all the stink water under the tile/vinyl and into the subfloor.
     
  31. GilaMinumBeer

    Half-fast Prattlarian  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    And, sometimes it's just lazy toddlers. :eek:

    Thought I had a leak after noticing what looked like moisture weep in grout tile around a toilet base. Assumed the ring failed. Pulled the toilet. It looked fine. Cleaned the floor, replaced the ring, reset toilet.

    Still noticed tile grout seepage discoloration.

    Fast forward, 7 y/o son left door open one day and I just happened by and saw him "no handing". Pee all over the toilet.

    Made him hand clean that room with a scrub brush and a bucket. Problem solved.
     
  32. Psylocide

    Ippons for Days

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    How about those that are standers but identify as sitters?

    Talk about some wild shyte.
     
    hunter_la5, Gavin C and firerat like this.
  33. GHBWNY

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Reminds me of my 6-yr old grandson. One time he wanted me to come with him to the bathroom. While he was jabbering on about something he and I were going to play when we got back downstairs, he took perfect aim and then stood there with hands on his hips, his head turned toward me, talking while he went. Never missed a drop!
     
  34. Silentdrinker

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Pretty weird... Since I have a toilet paper roll sitting next to the toilet and it's not sopping wet and dripping of piss. I think all you sitters out there need to stop sword fighting while you pee standing up.
     
  35. MaxStout

    Well-Known Member  

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    [​IMG]
     
  36. Silentdrinker

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    [​IMG]
     
  37. kombat

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    I'm convinced this is a regional thing.

    Up here in the Great White North, we take our shoes off when we enter someone's house. It's honestly never occurred to me NOT to take my shoes off. The only times I've ever been in someone's home with my shoes on was when helping them move, and we were taking frequent trips in/outdoors, and the floors were going to be cleaned after everything was moved out anyway.

    That said, we have this thing up here called "winter." You don't want someone tromping across your white carpet wearing snow/salt-soaked snowmobile boots.

    But even in places without snow, do you *always* leave your shoes on indoors? What if it's raining? Do you walk around someone's house with wet shoes on?

    And as for the "sweaty foot funk," guess what? If you don't keep your feet mummified in leather for 18 hours a day, they don't actually get that sweaty/funky! Try it sometime.
     
  38. adiochiro3

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    Awesome parenting technique! Thanks and kudos!
     
  39. hunter_le five

    Sheriff Underscore

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    We have doormats. We wipe our feet when we come in.
     
    brewcephus and Stealthcruiser like this.
  40. kombat

    Well-Known Member

    Posted Aug 14, 2015
    At 3:30 in the morning, when nature's calling and I'm still half-asleep (and planning to get back to sleep in roughly 90 seconds), I don't want to blast my eyes with light and risk waking myself up any more than is absolutely necessary to complete the task at hand.
     
    The_Bishop and Gonefishing like this.
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