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Old 07-16-2008, 10:57 AM   #1
VatorMan
 
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Google find Chuck Norris and hit the I'm feeling lucky button.
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Old 07-16-2008, 11:09 AM   #2
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For the next item up for bid, try french military victories and clicking I'm Feeling Lucky.
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Old 07-16-2008, 12:58 PM   #3
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Those are both very entertaining.

The Chuck Norris facts phenomenon has always puzzled me. One would think these jokes could have been applied to any '80s or '90s tv action hero, yet Chuck Norris won out. Would these jokes have worked equally well on Jean Claude Van Dam (sp?), Mr. T, Hulk Hogan, Steven Seagul, or that dude who played Highlander? They're all tough guys from the same era as Norris, right? Is Chuck more of a "B" actor so it works better? Anyways, I thought it was damn funny when someone interviewed him about he's newfound celebrity and all he really had to say was that jesus was the only true badass. I'm not dissing his religion, but come on, he should have been hamming it up and playing along with the gag! I think it just left a lot of fans dissappointed.
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:02 PM   #4
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Chuck Norris once ate two 72oz steaks in an hour................


He spent the first 45min having sex with the waitress




 
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:14 PM   #5
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Well if you ask me... it's because Chuck Norris was the REAL DEAL, not just some idiot actror that wanted be badass like Steven Segal and the rest of them.

look it up

Bruce Lee was the only badder ass and he died before he could become a god...
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:22 PM   #6
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Real Deal? wuteva. Chuck Norris was a washed up hack-tor who, despite his ability to perform high roundhouse kicks in his specially-crafted roundhouse-kick-jeans, had been relegated to terrible cable programming (Walker, Texas Ranger) and Total Gym ads.

Then, an internet meme saved him, revived his standing in the world, turned his career around to the point where he was on the campaign trail with presidential candidates.

And then, someone writes a fictional parody book about the whole "super badass" meme that revived his career...and what does the "real deal" do?

He turns around and sues them. Chuck Norris is a douchewaddle.
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:30 PM   #7
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"douchewaddle." Feeling creative this morning, eh?

Can any word be used as a modifier? Maybe I'll start using the term "doucheboat", or "douchemug." Say, that's got a ring to it. "Chuck Norris is a douchemug."
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:32 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Evan! View Post
Real Deal? wuteva. Chuck Norris was a washed up hack-tor who, despite his ability to perform high roundhouse kicks in his specially-crafted roundhouse-kick-jeans, had been relegated to terrible cable programming (Walker, Texas Ranger) and Total Gym ads.

Then, an internet meme saved him, revived his standing in the world, turned his career around to the point where he was on the campaign trail with presidential candidates.

And then, someone writes a fictional parody book about the whole "super badass" meme that revived his career...and what does the "real deal" do?

He turns around and sues them. Chuck Norris is a douchewaddle.

AHAHAHAHAHAAHHA

Oh Evan, Evan, Evan.. he's 68 years old and would still hand you YOUR ARSE!


I'm not saying he wasn't a hack actor, I am saying he was a REAL black belt master that won many competitions, taught many others how to fight and is a walking, talking legend.

It's sad to see his "walker" days when he reduced himself to a joke, but I guess Jimi would have ended up the same way at 60 years old, playing small clubs and pubs, after having once been a master of his art.
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:38 PM   #9
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they say that behind chuck norris' beard is another fist.
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Old 07-16-2008, 01:39 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFebtober View Post
"douchewaddle." Feeling creative this morning, eh?

Can any word be used as a modifier? Maybe I'll start using the term "doucheboat", or "douchemug." Say, that's got a ring to it. "Chuck Norris is a douchemug."
i prefer douchenozzle, but I wouldn't say that to chuck norris.
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