Worst Songs for a Lap Dance

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NothingRhymesWithCurtiss

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What are the 3 worst songs that you could imagine for a lap dance? I'm not asking for songs that you think are terrible, but rather, songs that the content/lyrics would just kill the mood.

I'll start:

  • Tears in Heaven
  • Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
  • Dear Mr. Jesus
 
The Ballad of Poncho and Lefty
The Ballad of Hollis Brown
The Ballad of Gilligan's Isle
 
Candle in the Wind - Elton John
Walkin' on the sun - Smashmouth
Higher - Creed
 
I don't need three songs, because there is only one answer:

Daughter (Loudon Wainwright III)
 
A Spoonful of Sugar - Julie Andrews (Mary Poppins)
You Think I'm Psycho Don't You Mama - Leon Payne
Dropkick Me Jesus (Through the Goal Posts of Life) - Bobby Bare
 
I hope you dance - Lee Ann Womack
In the Arms of an Angel - Sarah Maclacghlophaline
Shannon - Henry Gross

(this premise is hilarious)
 
I've Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts - Danny Kaye (Come on, you would bust out laughing if one lap danced you to this)
A Boy Named Sue - Johnny Cash
"Your Song" - The one from when you first met SWMBO/first dance at your wedding.
 
Back for another round:

Itsy Bitsy Spider
The Battle Hymn of the Republic
99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall (can't believe I'm first to this one!)
 
- Aqualung (Jethro Tull)
- I'll Be Missing You (Puff Daddy)
- Were You There When They Crucified My Lord (Johnny Cash)
 
Let it go - Frozen Soundtrack
Do you want to build a snowman - Frozen Soundtrack
For the first time in forever - Frozen Soundtrack

If you have kids, you know this...
 
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