I think you've uncovered a plot that we've been following for some time. We here at the FBI( Fine Beer Institute) have been tracking the movements of the feindish BMC over the past few months. There have been developments in the areas of malt tampering and yeast depletion as well as an attempt by this organization to keep kegs out of the hands of homebrewers. They keep marking their kegs and claiming theft when one is commandeered for brewing. If brewing is outlawed, then only outlaws will brew beer ( or something like that. The PR Department is still working on that one.)
Brewers, join the Resistance! Quit drinking BMC, steal their kegs and make your own beer!
Not drunk, but I have had two cups of coffee.
More like a sock monkey, really...