I hear ya. I really can't wait to do my very own recipes, but in the meantime, I've got my first three AG batches in various stages of completion. I used recipes I found on the internet for all three. However, I now feel like I'm going to be able to create a recipe of my own that won't be horrible.
One thing I've done is tasted every ingredient that's gone into every one of my three very different recipes. I chewed up four different hop varieties as well as several different grains from the base malts to the dark roasted malts. I now have a pretty good idea what the different ingredients are likely to do to a brew (and why it doesn't take much black patent..).
Like I said, I haven't done one of my own yet, and in fact I haven't tasted a finished AG product yet, but I feel like I'm learning a ton just by tasting all the ingredients.
By the way, Special B makes an excellent snack food