Funny things you've overheard about beer

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CreamyGoodness said:
Yeah I agree. Guinness gets everything from "its so heavy!" to "its made with burnt wheat!" to "its made with molasses" to "They boil the beer for hours until it is a syrup, and then add water."
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Or that it is made with the sludge, left over from making light beers.
 
bleme said:
Or that it is made with the sludge, left over from making light beers.
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I've mostly heard that attributed to bock, where they clean the vats in the springtime and get all the sludge from the bottom.
 
emjay said:
I've mostly heard that attributed to bock, where they clean the vats in the springtime and get all the sludge from the bottom.
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Also the one where dark beer is drawn from the bottom of the fermenter and it gets lighter as you go towards the top!
 
Keith66 said:
It's okay to drink coffee stout before church on Sunday morning, right?
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How else are you going to get through it? ;)

I gave a shot of whiskey to each of my groomsmen before my wedding. The best were my BIL (who I think was 21 and could stand about half a beer - but not BMC) and my own brother, who I think was 16-17. They almost died choking it down. It was pretty good stuff, too (Jameson Gold).

All this dissing of Guinness' flavor is pretty disgusting on a site like this. It's a dry Irish stout. It's the classic style - all other dry stout aims for that flavor (if in style). Those wine forum people must have infiltrated HBT...
 
Guinness Original is pretty good but all we get here is the extra cold stuff on tap, which is pretty bland.

You do hear people spouting some right old rubbish about it, like how there's 600 calories in a pint or that 4 pints is your entire calorie allowance for the day.
 
malweth said:
All this dissing of Guinness' flavor is pretty disgusting on a site like this. It's a dry Irish stout. It's the classic style - all other dry stout aims for that flavor (if in style). Those wine forum people must have infiltrated HBT...
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Agreed. I had a Guinness recently for the first time in a long time, and no, it wasn't as good as I had remembered. I particularly thought that the mouthfeel was way more watery than I was wanting.

And?

This beer is the classic definition of a style. Nobody is making you drink it.

I think that Budweiser - and all American light lagers, really - are disgusting. For quite a few years, I thought that I didn't like beer - and then, that I didn't like lagers - because of the style. Millions upon millions of people disagree with me. It's a classic example of a style. If you don't like it, don't drink it. I don't.

The whole "looking down your nose at a beer" is just silly. If it's a bad beer, say it's a bad beer, sure. If it's a beer that you just don't like, drink something else.
 
I can't remember the last time I had a Guinness or BMC. I don't like them, so I don't drink them. Same with very hoppy beers like IPAs. That's why I started brewing my own beer. I simply thought my Guinness post would make an interesting discussion on a site whose purpose is discussing beer, which it has. Seems reasonable to me; we all have preferences. Prost!

Wait a second... your comment wasn't directed at me, was it... woops, never mind.
 
I like to pretend these myths about Guinness are possibly some amazingly subtle marketing strategies.

Its got a lot of alcohamol? Gimmiegimmiegimmie.

Heavily concentrated regular beer? This stuff must be awesome.

You can survive off of Guinness and an orange? Well, I had better acquire a taste for it.


Amusing. I do seem to remember when I first started drinking it did seem much heavier bodied. Now that I am more widely beer cultured than BMC and Guinness I notice how dry it is. I still will drink it and still find myself having the occasional BMC.


Here is my submission that is on topic
Upon being asked by my neighbors (college age) kid yesterday how my beermaking is going. I told him what all was fermenting and he asked what apfelwein is. He then asked me if it would be easier to just add vodka to the apple juice.

Edit - sounded like I was talking with a 10 year old
 
DrunkleJon said:
I like to pretend these myths about Guinness are possibly some amazingly subtle marketing strategies.

Its got a lot of alcohamol? Gimmiegimmiegimmie.

Heavily concentrated regular beer? This stuff must be awesome.

You can survive off of Guinness and an orange? Well, I had better acquire a taste for it.


Amusing. I do seem to remember when I first started drinking it did seem much heavier bodied. Now that I am more widely beer cultured than BMC and Guinness I notice how dry it is. I still will drink it and still find myself having the occasional BMC.


Here is my submission that is on topic
Upon being asked by my neighbors (college age) kid yesterday how my beermaking is going. I told him what all was fermenting and he asked what apfelwein is. He then asked me if it would be easier to just add vodka to the apple juice.

Edit - sounded like I was talking with a 10 year old
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"Why, yes, adding vodka to applejuice is easier than fermenting sugar and applejuice together. It will not, however, make apfelwein."
 
100% real conversation I had tonight with two guys buying a classic car I had for sale. The deal is done, and we are just shooting the bull and the guy buying it(who lives 1/2 a mile away) says I should stop by sometime for a beer and see his 32 ford 5 window.

Now these aren't kids, they are grown men in their late 40's early 50's

Me "Speaking of beer, you guys want a beer? All I have right now is IPA's"

them " What's IPA?"

Ok...not going to be a snob or a dick, not everyone knows what IPA's are.

Me " They tend to have a lot of hops, and if your not used to them you might not like it, but I'll get you one"

Them " hops?....what are hops?"

Me " umm...yea...nevermind, you won't like it, we'll go out and grab one sometime."
 
Thats why when introducing someone to a new beer or homebrew you always start with a good 'swaller' worth and give them the rest if they like it. But, yeah, if someone is uncertain what hops are, usually they will not enjoy an IPA
 
Told to me over the weekend after letting a friend of a friend taste my lhbs hopslam clone that didnt carb properly " him: it tastes like a pale ale but um stronger. Me: it is in fact it's called an India pale ale. Him: I usually like to drink those at ______ ( the local Indian restaurant) it makes the whole experience more authentic" lol just had to let it simmer a while.
 
mack25 said:
I overheard the manager of a liquor store - a rather large location, with a great selection and a number of locations in the area - telling a customer that cider is beer that they add apple juice to. And this was during a tasting of a new cider they started carrying.
Facepalm.
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Oh my. I'd be hard pressed not to correct him immediately in front of everyone like a total *******.
 
Ordered a thunderhead IPA, selection was terrible, at this place. Took a couple sips. Called the bartender over and said

Me: "this is bad"
Bartender Lady: "oh you don't like it I can get you something else?"
Me: "well yes I'll take something else, but this is an IPA and it tastes sour and borderline moldy"
Bartender Lady: "oh yeah we get that"
Me: "wait, what?"
Bartender Lady: "yeah most people don't say anything but yeah some do and I think it tastes wierd so I just get them something else"
Me: "How often do you clean your lines?"
Bartender Lady: "what do you mean?"
Me: "Nevermind I'll go ahead and have that Red Stripe in the bottle"
 
DrunkleJon said:
Thats why when introducing someone to a new beer or homebrew you always start with a good 'swaller' worth and give them the rest if they like it. But, yeah, if someone is uncertain what hops are, usually they will not enjoy an IPA
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I'm going to fire up BM's Cream of three crops for just such an instance.

Funny thing is when I told my wife (who hates beer) I was going to do a "BMCish" beer she said "why...If they're wussies that can't handle what you have on tap they can bring their own"

I'm so proud...snif snif....I could almost cry.
 
McBrewskie said:
Oh my. I'd be hard pressed not to correct him immediately in front of everyone like a total *******.
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oh snap! and I have been the a-hole that made the other guy/gal look like a total a-hole in front of groups before. nothing wrong with correcting misinformation to the masses.



and beer may not make me smart, but it does make me a smart ass. more than normal.
 
Well,they think we're being smarta$$es. I don't see it that way,being an English major. Comm 1 & 2 in college were more interesting. Rather amusingly similar to the bar explanation bit. All through school,they taught us formal English,right? Well,by the time I got to college,in communications 2 they taught us to right the way we speak. Just learn to speak correctly.
Oh boy,did I have some fun with that one...:D:mug:
 
Alright, funny to me at the time...
I'm standing in the bottle shop and I overhear a lady asking her husband what kind of beer he liked, light or dark?
And it occurred to me that there are more than two kinds of beer. It was just kind of an ah ha / funny moment for me. We often refer to light or dark to describe beer but there is so much more to it. I was thinking a better place to start is ale or lager. Just cracked me up in the bottle shop, maybe you had to be there.
 

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