10 Things to Ponder for 2007 - Home Brew Forums
Register Now For Free!

Home Brew Forums > Home Brewing Community > Drunken Ramblings and Mindless Mumbling > 10 Things to Ponder for 2007

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 01-19-2007, 07:06 PM   #1
homebrewer_99
 
homebrewer_99's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Feb 2005
Atkinson (near the Quad Cities), IL
Posts: 17,792
Liked 133 Times on 99 Posts



#10 - Life is sexually transmitted.

#9 - Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die.

#8 - Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

#7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

#6 - Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

#5 - Health nuts are going to feel real stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing.

#4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

#3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents???

#2 - In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE #1 THOUGHT FOR 2007:

We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
__________________
HB Bill

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2007, 02:05 AM   #2
Spyk'd
HBT_SUPPORTER.png
 
Spyk'd's Avatar
Recipes 
 
May 2006
Waveland, MS
Posts: 1,074
Liked 28 Times on 21 Posts


Nice, I love lists...


Perhaps we should have a list joke sticky?

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2007, 07:05 AM   #3
Reverend JC
2500 gallons year to date
HBT_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
 
Reverend JC's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Jun 2006
Your Mom's
Posts: 1,880
Liked 3 Times on 3 Posts


I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. oK here comes the republican in me but now can they not find the illegals, but the demacraps are gonig to shoot down funding for our great 2k mile wall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________
"Just because i don't care dosen't mean I don't understand." -Homer Simpson


http://www.modernmonks.com

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2007, 07:11 AM   #4
RichBrewer
HBT_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
 
RichBrewer's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Feb 2006
Denver, Colorado
Posts: 5,897
Liked 169 Times on 88 Posts


Quote:
Originally Posted by Reverend JC
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. oK here comes the republican in me but now can they not find the illegals, but the demacraps are gonig to shoot down funding for our great 2k mile wall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lets not get political please. This is not the place for political conversations.
__________________
Cheers,
Rich

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2007, 04:40 PM   #5
Catfish
Art by David Shrigley
HBT_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
 
Catfish's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Jul 2005
Nishinomiya, Japan
Posts: 840
Liked 15 Times on 3 Posts


10-6 are great 5-1 are not very funny though.

Pushing your slinky-like coworker down the stair... Funny.
Critisizing the weather... no funny.

Thank you for reminding me not to comment on the previous political comment. Good moderating!
__________________
鯰 a.k.a. なまず a.k.a. Catfish

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2007, 06:59 PM   #6
homebrewer_99
 
homebrewer_99's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Feb 2005
Atkinson (near the Quad Cities), IL
Posts: 17,792
Liked 133 Times on 99 Posts


Hey!!! Catfish is still with us!!
__________________
HB Bill

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2007, 09:17 PM   #7
t-dogg
Recipes 
 
Nov 2006
b'ham alabama
Posts: 128

If i could just convince my wife on #8

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2007, 10:54 PM   #8
Cheesefood
Recipes 
 
Jul 2005
Poo-Poo Land
Posts: 6,748
Liked 42 Times on 29 Posts


Quote:
Originally Posted by beer4breakfast
The only one I think is not funny is #1. Except for that one, which is really out of place compared to the rest of them, I'd be sending this list to all my friends.

Anyone got an apolitical AND funny alternative to #1?
Women will gladly take a pill that has side effects of blood clots, stroke, and some cancers. Unless it makes them gain weight.
__________________
Past Winners: Caramel Cream Ale #1, Hoegaarden Clone, Boom-Boom Vanilla Ale, Lazy Monk Abbey Style, Amarillo Cream Ale. (AG),

Buy a shirt now!!! Please! Did I help you? Buya shirt!
Cool Shirts.



 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2007, 12:47 AM   #9
Yooper
Ale's What Cures You!
HBT_ADMIN.png
 
Yooper's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Jun 2006
UP of Michigan, Winter Texan
Posts: 69,733
Liked 8010 Times on 5599 Posts


Quote:
Originally Posted by beer4breakfast
That's a good one, Cheese! Much nicer and more funny. If you're a guy anyway. I'm not sure how the women feel.
It's funny!

Reminds me of something- I was getting dressed for a big event and put on an outfit that I really wasn't sure about. I asked my husband, "Honey, does this outfit make me look fat". He studied it for a minute and said "No". Then he added, "It's your body that makes you look fat". I have never asked him again for his opinion on anything.

Lorena
__________________
Broken Leg Brewery
Giving beer a leg to stand on since 2006

 
Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2007, 01:01 AM   #10
RichBrewer
HBT_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
 
RichBrewer's Avatar
Recipes 
 
Feb 2006
Denver, Colorado
Posts: 5,897
Liked 169 Times on 88 Posts


Quote:
Originally Posted by Yooper Brewmistress
It's funny!

Reminds me of something- I was getting dressed for a big event and put on an outfit that I really wasn't sure about. I asked my husband, "Honey, does this outfit make me look fat". He studied it for a minute and said "No". Then he added, "It's your body that makes you look fat". I have never asked him again for his opinion on anything.

Lorena
I've learned to stay away from questions from SWMBO about her or any other woman's body.
When we were first married we were standing in the line at the grocery and there was a magazine with Charline Tilton (Spelling?) on the cover. She was in a fairly skimpy bikini. My wife asked me what I thought of her. I told her that I thought she looked heavy in that particular bikini. The next words out of her mouth: "Well what do you think of me then?" She was mad at me for about 2 weeks. The only possible answer to that question would have been to tell her that no other woman is attractive to me. She would have saw through it right away but at least I would have avoided answering the question.
Maybe your husbands approach is the best. Be honest and say it like it is. Although I seriously doubt you look fat in anything.
__________________
Cheers,
Rich

 
Reply With Quote
Reply
Thread Tools


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Something to ponder sullifan General Beer Discussion 5 12-25-2008 10:25 PM
Three things to ponder.... finchlake Drunken Ramblings and Mindless Mumbling 3 12-13-2007 06:04 PM
Rush 2007! mawa General Chit Chat 3 08-07-2007 03:11 AM
Questions to Ponder El Pistolero General Chit Chat 18 03-19-2006 05:21 AM


Forum Jump