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Old 07-13-2009, 04:50 PM   #11
conpewter
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You can just rekey them yourself, it really isn't hard for most locks. I used to do it at my old job, bought a little set to rekey on ebay and re-did the locks when I moved into my new house.
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Old 07-13-2009, 05:07 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by GilaMinumBeer View Post
Anyone tried to just get the cylinders replaced (re-keyed) in their house locks?

How does one go about getting the cylinder (core) key? Does Lowes have those (that is where I bought the locks)?
If you bought the locks at Lowes, I'm guessing they are relatively easy to rekey.

If you go the the lock manufacturer website you can download instructions on how to remove the lock cylinders from your doorknobs/deadbolts. I believe you will need the key that fits the lock to remove the cylinder...that was the case for my locksets (Schlage). No "master key" necessary.

Once you have the cylinders in hand, you can take them to a hardware store and have them rekeyed. I don't know if they can rekey them randomly and make you a new set of keys, of if you will have to buy a new lock and have your cylinders rekeyed to for that key.

 
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Old 07-13-2009, 05:13 PM   #13
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Not sure if they are Schlage or Kwikset branded. Turn out, Lowes carries the kits (at least on their website) for 6 locks at only $10.00.

Too bad it isn;t this easy for the car. I may just skip that one, it's insured.

 
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Old 07-13-2009, 05:42 PM   #14
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Sorry to hear about your problems. Sometimes keys turn up much later, after you have replaced them. When Jon was very young he hid them to play with us, but forgot where they were. A year later I found them under the steps of the deck.

The other issue you are basically powerless to affect any change for the better. They do that sometimes, and there is no easy 'cure'. In my case, it took losing everything I had, divorce at her request, and she is still crazy 10 years later. About 98% of the time, they remain in denial, since it is easier to blame you. Their friends will be only too happy to jump on the pile, and no one will take your side, or if they do, they won't have guts to help you in any way. Friends of yours will take her side, because of horrible things she says you've done, and her friends will convince her to take you for everything.

You will dismiss this, but if things do continue in this way, it's your only option to prepare yourself for the eventuality of divorce, and property division. To help yourself before that fact, start selling your stuff, stashing the cash, and maybe convert titles to a trusted relative's name for $1 sale amount. You will need that cash to start over in a new apartment and with starting utilities. OR, you can keep trying to get her help, go thru excruciating and humiliating turmoil and argument, perhaps her getting physical and then blaming it on you, and the first one to make a complaint is innocent of the charge. You get arrested and she later drops the charge so it won't cost you guys anything. In which case, when she files, you are immediately legally forced out of the house, and she has custody of your property to liquidate, even though there is a restraining order to NOT sell stuff-because she will get away with this. You can be in a psych's office with her showing these symptoms, and the Dr. urges her to not make any decisions while there is this 'issue' with her going on, and she stays with her decision to divorce you, against the Dr's advice .

Guess how I know all this.

The key problem you can do something about.
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Old 07-13-2009, 06:05 PM   #15
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Well, I have no solution to the key issue ... but as the mother of a 2-year-old and a 6-month-old, I can empathize a bit with your wife.

Does she stay at home with them? It can get very lonely, and it's also very stressful to have small people constantly demanding things from you ALL. DAY. LONG. I joked the other day that my idea of a good day was vacuuming the house without a baby strapped to my back and going grocery shopping without doing so much planning that I might as well be invading Normandy.

I'm willing to bet that her real concern is not so much "you're not spending time with the kids" as it is "I desperately need some time away from the kids." But a lot of women don't necessarily feel comfortable saying that. (Someone told me after I had my first, "There isn't a mother alive who wouldn't chew off her own arm sometimes to get away from her kids" ... and that was the first time I felt OK admitting, "Yeah, sometimes this mom thing SUCKS.")

I know most guys aren't big on the talking, but I would sit down with her and address two issues: 1) Does she need a break from the kids sometimes? (Maybe you guys can get a sitter and go out to dinner and a movie, or you could take care of the kids while she goes out with friends.) 2) Why isn't she more concerned about the keys? It may be she just hasn't thought it through and doesn't realize that there's a security risk here ... or she may realize (rather practically) that it's highly unlikely whoever finds them knows which house they go to
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Old 07-13-2009, 07:14 PM   #16
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No. she works too but, she was BS crazy before the kids. Now, it's just more frequent. I am a VERY family oriented dad and a card acrrying housekeeper too.

The only things she does exclusively is the laundry (cause she's got too many "delicate" type stuff) and the cooking (cause she won't eat my food whereas I'll eat almost anything so long as it's cooked). She also tends the youngest (6mo)cause I, aparently, can;t perform those that task to her governement specifications. I however, tend the toddler (3yr) almost exclusively and include him into EVERYTHING I do. I, literally, have not showered, or sh!t alone for 3 years because he is ALWAYS there. She, on the other hand, has the luxury of cat napping while the baby nods. And when he's awake I am usually the one vacuuming with him on my hip.

We have talked about finding a sitter (of which I am not to comfortable with) and she is abhorent.

Honestly, I am completely clueless as to what the real issue is.

As to the keys, yes I realize that there is a possibility that whomever may find them may not know what house they belong to but, that isn't enough. We have too many valuable "toys" in the house and what's more we have the kids too. Not knowing where those keys are bothers me to no end. and the cost to replace the car key is rediculous.

 
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Old 07-13-2009, 07:49 PM   #17
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Heh -- I can definitely sympathize with the inability to shower or go to the bathroom alone! Sucks, doesn't it?

Have you tried sitting down with her and saying, "Honey, I don't know what's going on, but I can tell something is wrong -- please talk to me"? Or maybe suggesting counseling?

She sounds pretty stressed and overwhelmed, at any rate. Sounds like she feels like she HAS to be there for the baby, and whatever her reasoning is, that can be tough. I'd work on getting her to feel more comfortable with YOU taking care of the baby, then working on getting her comfortable with a sitter or family member caring for the kids now and then. (Maybe someone from their daycare or something?)
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Old 07-13-2009, 07:57 PM   #18
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Quote:
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Heh -- I can definitely sympathize with the inability to shower or go to the bathroom alone! Sucks, doesn't it?

Have you tried sitting down with her and saying, "Honey, I don't know what's going on, but I can tell something is wrong -- please talk to me"? Or maybe suggesting counseling?

She sounds pretty stressed and overwhelmed, at any rate. Sounds like she feels like she HAS to be there for the baby, and whatever her reasoning is, that can be tough. I'd work on getting her to feel more comfortable with YOU taking care of the baby, then working on getting her comfortable with a sitter or family member caring for the kids now and then. (Maybe someone from their daycare or something?)
She MAY be stressed about her current project, immigrating her Mother. of which, I have issues with. This would be the second time her Mother has come to live with us. the first time, my wife essentially booted her out onto a plane. She wouldn't even speak to her in the airport. This wasn;t part of the argument but, she knows I am vehemently opposed to any long term stays by her Mother. However, I do concede to a short term visit as it's less expensive for one to fly internationally than it is for 3.

Because it has been so long since her Mother left here my wife is forced to re-immigrate her Mother as they won't approve a visitation visa in consideration that they assume her mother won't go back. It has been going on for too long and yet, it is coming to an end too soon.

 
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Old 07-13-2009, 08:25 PM   #19
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From the time my son was born until he turned four, our house was a battlefield. We fought and yelled, she cried, he screamed (all just verbal, thank god). He's almost six and I couldn't imagine a happier family.

Whatever you do, realize that two kids under age 4 will make you both insane. I can't imagine a bigger stress on a marriage. I can't tell you what to do, but I just gritted my teeth, realized what a pain in the ass it would be to split everything up and get divorced, and eventually things got better.

I also quit drinking beer for that period- and started with Scotch. It works faster.

 
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Old 07-13-2009, 08:33 PM   #20
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I also quit drinking beer for that period- and started with Scotch. It works faster.
Nah. It'd interfere with my Coke addiction. Joking of course.

I honestly don't mind a little crazy. It's all the bat-sh!t that's getting harder to deal with. Divorce for me, at least, is not an option. 1.) I do love her. 2.) It's not worth the trouble to break up the family 3.) The first thing she'd do is pack up and go home. Prolly with my boys so a custody battle would have to take place and, what a pain.


 
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