The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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yeager1977 said:
Had a great night at the Bog Inn with my wife the other night. Except for the bartenders. View attachment 226063
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Was that before or after you promptly spilled a beer all over the bar? Or before or after your SWMBO complained that there was no blueberry beer "like the taps at home"?


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ImageUploadedByHome Brew1411768280.346775.jpg

Bummah.
 
LOL!!!!! I see what you did there! You pretended like I said there was no good beer in the tap room!!! Ahhhhahahahaha!!!! Well played! Well... played.


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Cape Brewing said:
Was that before or after you promptly spilled a beer all over the bar? Or before or after your SWMBO complained that there was no blueberry beer "like the taps at home"?


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It was after both. And it was only a small a amount spilled the glass was almost empty.
 
Stopped at The Sluice Room for a few minutes yesterday. The place was packed with investment bankers trying to show who had the biggest schlong, with Cape smack dab in the middle of the melee.

"Oh, So you sit in the second car of the 7:30 train and manage $25 million in accounts? That's nice. I sit in the first car of the 8:;15 and manage my $450 million account."

I couldn't get out of there fast enough.
 
I think you were confused Paul... then again, that's not surprised given how hammered you were. I don't know where you were before you showed up at our place but those people should be arrested for serving you like that. And thanks for causing a scene when Matt refused to serve you. That was awesome. Place was packed with folks having a good time and all of a sudden it was like the old needle-being-pulled-off-the-record sound effect and the place was almost silent.

I think that was really the reason you "couldn't wait to get out of there"


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Oh... I thought we were just makin shti up now like your post... or at least grossly exaggerating.

Either way you're lucky that guy didn't knock you out after dumping half your beer on him.
 
... and you're telling us this why? Is there more to this story?

"... and then when I looked into the backyard, my pizza oven had collapsed!"
"... and wouldn't you know, there were a half-dozen zombie strippers crawling out from under my shed!"
"... you won't believe this, but that little old lady from next door was at the doorway with a shotgun, demanding the $1,500 to fix her Toyota!"
"... and that new bathroom I build? I sat my ass on the can, and next thing you know I've crashed down all the way to the basement, covered in feces and shattered porcelain with my pants around my ankles!"

I mean, you wouldn't really waste the time to tell us you woke up and took a ****, would you?
 
Ya. I woke up at 2. Thought it was 5:30. Got up. Dropped a deuce. Washed my dingus. Put on my scrubs and was headed out the door before I realized I was 3 hours ahead of myself.

So ya. I wasted your time telling you that I dropped a log in the middle of the night then went back to bed.


But I didn't waste nearly as much of your time as you did writing your response to my little story.

So cram it up your arse, ya f'ing hillbilly! Maybe you'll drop a huge deuce tomorrow and feel a lot better about things.
 
That's f'ing beautiful. He Whom Everyone Hates is the only one who wished Cape a Happy Birthday. I'm feeling all warm and tingly. It's kind of cute seeing two refugees from The Land of Misfit Toys finding friendship.

 
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I think you're just disappointed in yourself more than anything since you have cold, dead, black soul compared to Rookie's


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Don't we usually get 2 weeks of Cape "hinting" ( not so subtlety) that his birthday is coming?

Must have been too busy in the tap room this year.

Surprising too, isn't this one the big 5-0?


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InkBird 300

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