Son #1 about to turn 21

I'm a little nervous about this.

If I was not a homebrewer, it would be easy. You know, that 1st dad and son beer. He's had beer, but not with me.

So I've got 5 or 6 cold kegs ready to pour all the time. Even though he's gonna be 21, I don't want to come home every day and see him sitting on the couch with a tall one. He goes back to college in the fall, but this summer is my concern.

(woops, there he is now... gotta go)

Just sit down with him and talk about expectations... If my 2 year old understands not to touch the tap handles, then I'm sure you can have a civil conversation with your son and set the ground rules.

Good luck BTW

He's going to be a college student on summer break. Let him pound the **** out of your kegs (OK, that sounds dirty).

is your concern that he's going to drink all your beer or that he's going to be drinking too much in general because it's always on hand?

CidCitrus said:

is your concern that he's going to drink all your beer or that he's going to be drinking too much in general because it's always on hand?

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I'm not worried about my beer... I can make more!

He's a very respectful son and I know he'll follow whatever rules I create. I just haven't exactly formulated those yet. Probably will involve only drinking when I'm home, and ask first. Oh, then there's the friends...

Makes me thankful I got 2 daughters when they get that age all I got to tell them is how many calories per pint and they won't touch it

I Turned 21 reasonably recently and I have a beer with my dad all the time. Not too long ago I god the fact that I drank from my parents and was irresponsible. I drank bad beer in excess. Then I found craft beer and while I still overindulge beer is about much more than getting drunk. I know you can relate. Share this with your son. Not only will it help him to make good decisions by himself but allow bonding with you. That's what I'd want for my son. Just some parenting advice from someone who knows nothing about parenting.

Have him brew his own beer with you. After that he can do with it what he likes, and when it's gone, the gas is cut off.

deuce said:

have him brew his own beer with you. After that he can do with it what he likes, and when it's gone, the gas is cut off.

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+1

Deuce said:

Have him brew his own beer with you. After that he can do with it what he likes, and when it's gone, the gas is cut off.

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That's the ticket right there! OK, that & the rules thing.
Regards, GF.

He's 21. If you tell him he can't drink at home unless you're there, he can go to the bars, pay twice as much, and drive home. Let him know the taps are open, but you expect him to still get his **** done. Does he not get a job over summer break? If not, then what else is there to do at 21 in the summer? Better start brewing

Make him pay for it. He's a big boy now.

My youngest just turned 21. I'd say that if your son wanted to drink to excess, he probably would have been doing it already. Perfect opportunity, ya know, with 5 or 6 kegs, there's not a lot of worry about evidence like a case of empty cans (or one empty keg).
Sounds like he's respectful of the beer and his parents' values. Attaining legal drinking age isn't going to change that.

My oldest turned 21 a little over a week ago. The rule in my house has always been "you drink, you stay home" Period. Since he was 17 and joined the Army Reserve I have not had a problem if he wanted a beer or two, but as soon as he made the decision to drink the first one, he was stuck at home the rest of the night. 99% of the time, he didn't drink and went out. Now I'm not dumb enough to believe he wasn't out drinking with his friends somewhere, but at least he did abide by the rules of my house. As far as his friends were concerned, if they weren't old enough to drink, then they weren't allowed to at my house. My son is one thing, but his friends are not my kids. So basically, Pawn, he's gonna drink if he wants to because he can. Just tell him that if he wants to stay at home and drink homebrew he is house-bound for the night. And if he starts to drink what you would consider too much, have a talk with him.

Electrify the tap handles.


J/K...civility solves most problems. Pawn, you're an intelligent dude, you've brought him to 21 years old. I think if you sit down and talk, things will be cool.

JoeyChopps said:

Makes me thankful I got 2 daughters when they get that age all I got to tell them is how many calories per pint and they won't touch it

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At that age, you'll have other concerns with your daughters.

While I can not speak of you and yours I can speak of my experiences. Before I turned 21 it was a big "to do" to get beer/booze. We drank recklessly and were mostly out of control. I turned 21 and after about a week of binge drinking I decided that drinking "whatever we had" to the point of vomiting daily had become old and I looked at my underage friends as "lesser".

All the thrill of the "doing something your not supposed to be doing" was gone. No need to "sneak" into bars anymore. This was also the start of my craft brew drinking since my dad drank the cheapest #@^& he could get and I was able to CHOOSE what I wanted instead of "this is what we have."

I can tell you that I wish I had spent MORE time having craft beers with my father and that I wish I would have brewed a few more batches with him before he past away. Time is always short but having a good time with family has become a standard here. Honestly my biggest concern is accidentally teaching one of the 4 year olds a "new word".

FWIW Rules are meant to be broken and say "I do not trust you to be smart enough to NOT do what I expect". I suggest no rules until there is a need for them. Why draw "lines in the sand" before you need to? Your son may just surprise you, drinking with dad is not the same as drinking with nim-witted buddies, it is a right of passage so to speak. After the initial "I'M 21!!!!" wears away take a brewery tour or go to a nice brew pub for some good father/son time.

passedpawn said:

I'm a little nervous about this.

If I was not a homebrewer, it would be easy. You know, that 1st dad and son beer. He's had beer, but not with me.

So I've got 5 or 6 cold kegs ready to pour all the time. Even though he's gonna be 21, I don't want to come home every day and see him sitting on the couch with a tall one. He goes back to college in the fall, but this summer is my concern.

(woops, there he is now... gotta go)

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Lay out the expectations in advance. It sounds like drinking isn't the only thing in play here. More like you expect him to tow the line around the home even though he's an adult. From reading your posts, I'm sure you'll have no problem presenting the concerns and expectations while he's home. The rule my father had for me at that age was "last night has nothing to do with today." No matter how late I was out, I was expected ready to work at 7, no excuses.

Congratulations on your son turning 21.

JoeyChopps said:

Makes me thankful I got 2 daughters when they get that age all I got to tell them is how many calories per pint and they won't touch it

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Hah! That's funny, I've got a 17-yr-old daughter that's the same.

The boy though is big and not afraid of calories. 6'2" 200lb+ I'm guessing he could put some beer away!

I'd probably tell him that he was welcome to have a beer or two, but that you didn't want to see him getting drunk - and if the drinking began to interfere with his responsibilities, you were going to cut him off. He can have a beer if he acts as a responsible adult.

I'd also make it clear that the taps weren't open for his friends. Even if they're of legal age, I wouldn't want the potential liability if they had a couple and got into an accident.

I have 20 and 21 year old sons. I used to lock the keezer up when i went to bed or gone for the night. I think once the fascination of brew on tap for them wore of, its not a huge deal anymore. They are adults and i do give them the chance to make a good decision.

D-MOTITAN said:

I have 20 and 21 year old sons. I used to lock the keezer up when i went to bed or gone for the night. I think once the fascination of brew on tap for them wore of, its not a huge deal anymore. They are adults and i do give them the chance to make a good decision.

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Get a scale. Weight the kegs before you go to bed, and when you wake up.

Trust, but verify!

the_bird said:

Get a scale. Weight the kegs before you go to bed, and when you wake up.

Trust, but verify!

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They now get the hint they can have a brew when me or the wife are having some. I am not naive enough to leave it hooked up when me and the SWMBO are heading out of town for the weekend. Unless i need the room to keg