Ever have a neighbor...

that knows EVERYTHING. You know, the one that has no qualms about coming over to tell you that you are doing, well, everything wrong?

I have one of those. Ya know, I like the guy and I can tolerate his "knowlege", but he cracks me up.

There was a rumor a couple weeks back that the reason my back yard looked so BAD was because I was still watering my grass into October, and it froze the grass!! OH NO, FROZEN GRASS! This came from, you guessed it, the neighborhood genius. I still cannot figure out how my grass froze and his didnt when it was 10F half the winter!

Here is my back yard:


Here is the genius's yard:

Good thing "genius" is not a pilot.

Don't laugh if genius is watering his yard this October as well.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahah that is funny

Soperbrew said:

Good thing "genius" is not a pilot.

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When we are all hanging out, someone always asks some aviation related question... and he generally has some "wisdom" to share on the subject. He used to be a "pro" golfer, race car driver and a "pro" landscaper.

Like I said, I like the guy, but I bite my tongue so much it hurts.

I seem to run into a lot of self proclaimed know it alls here at HBT. There is this one guy who is an airline pilot.......

Pro landscaper! What?

Yeah. We (the rest of the neighborhood) call him "The Sexual Intellectual"... ya know, "F**kin Know It All".

Ask him questions about the clouds

McKBrew said:

I seem to run into a lot of self proclaimed know it alls here at HBT. There is this one guy who is an airline pilot.......

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hahahah the sexual intellect, im stealing that one

McKBrew said:

I seem to run into a lot of self proclaimed know it alls here at HBT. There is this one guy who is an airline pilot.......

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Too funny, just too funny! :cross:

The Pol said:

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This picture alone explains why he's always at your place for two reasons.

1.) Good fences make good neighbors.

2.) Even a genius can tell that your beer ain't gonna stay on THAT table long. WTF? Screened patio and the furniture is outside on a slope.

So, what is the deal with the single tree in each backyard? Covenant requirement?

I think every neighborhood has one . Doesn't it rain in October where you live? We get rain in into February here.

But seriously though, I work with one. If you saw a wild Kangaroo on your trip to Australia he tells you he used to work on a Kangaroo farm in Canada where they had these giant heaters to keep the fields warm during the winter.

GilaMinumBeer said:

This picture alone explains why he's always at your place for two reasons.

1.) Good fences make good neighbors.

2.) Even a genius can tell that your beer ain't gonna stay on THAT table long. WTF? Screened patio and the furniture is outside on a slope.

So, what is the deal with the single tree in each backyard? Covenant requirement?

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HA HA that is funny!

The builder plants ONE tree in the back... we are getting another (4) 20' trees planted. You can have as many as you wish, but they plant ONE.

When it comes to knowlege about anything, I dont know CRAP... but I look it up or research it... OR look to people like we have on HBT with some experience. When is comes to most things, the neighbor is a professional, when I tell him that I researched it on the NET... he tells me you cannot trust anything on the NET. Obvioulsy he doenst trust the "gravity" thing, looking at his table and chairs in the back yard either.

springer said:

I think every neighborhood has one . Doesn't it rain in October where you live? We get rain in into February here.

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Yes, but it is different, he is a professional! I still cant see where my lawn is damaged.

He went to one neighbors house last year and started yanking up sod claiming that he swore they had grubs. Never found any, but did some of his own damage!

The Pol said:

Yes, but it is different, he is a professional! I still cant see where my lawn is damaged.

He went to one neighbors house last year and started yanking up sod claiming that he swore they had grubs. Never found any, but did some of his own damage!

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yanking up other people sod.?! He would have been picking rock salt out of his butt if he did that to my yard.

He's prolly bid with the builder or solicited him, and keeps getting passed up. So, now it's his "duty" to point out the flaws in teh workmanship of his competitor(s).

Even though his lawn is covered in weeds.

springer said:

yanking up other people sod.?! He would have been picking rock salt out of his butt if he did that to my yard.

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Well... yah. He has given EVERYONE advice on thier yards...

It is like taking budget advice from someone who is bankrupt.

GilaMinumBeer said:

Even though his lawn is covered in weeds.

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hey now He say's they are not weeds . They are the makings of a dandelion salad . He should know he was the salad maker at the Waldorf Astoria in NYC.....

springer said:

hey now He say's there not weeds . There the makings of a dandelion salad . He should know he was the salad maker at the Waldorf Astoria in NYC.....

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Exactly... par for the course.

I've got a neigbor who expects me to mow my lawn on the same day as he does. I dont have a problem with that as long as it coincides with the day that I am going to mow!:rockin:

Henry Hill said:

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(IBL)