Funny things you've overheard about beer

CornyKegs 728
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opiate82 said:
So my wife and I were watching the Football playoffs this weekend and every break they had that AB commercial that says something along the lines of "Do you know where your beer was brewed?"

My wife responded to no-one in particular "Yeah, right out there in the garage."
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I was actually in the process of oxygenating my carboy of Newcastle clone this past Saturday (49ers/panthers game) when that commercial came on. My assistant and I looked at each other and laughed.
 
opiate82 said:
So my wife and I were watching the Football playoffs this weekend and every break they had that AB commercial that says something along the lines of "Do you know where your beer was brewed?"

My wife responded to no-one in particular "Yeah, right out there in the garage."
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What is the point of those adverts anyway? Is it to highlight that some "premium imported" beers are actually contract brewed in the US? Is there a "craft" beer association in the US like the likes of CAMRA (UK) or SOBA (NZ)... if so everyone should push for them to run a "Do you know who owns your favourite brewery?" ad campaign :D
Might just open the eyes to a lot of those "buy America" BMC drinking types!
 
mattd2 said:
What is the point of those adverts anyway? Is it to highlight that some "premium imported" beers are actually contract brewed in the US? Is there a "craft" beer association in the US like the likes of CAMRA (UK) or SOBA (NZ)... if so everyone should push for them to run a "Do you know who owns your favourite brewery?" ad campaign :D
Might just open the eyes to a lot of those "buy America" BMC drinking types!
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I think they are trying to make BMC a bit more Craft-y. Basically make you think that the beer is handcrafted and anything but fully automated and produced in quantities that are on par with your average Olympic sized swimming pool.
 
I read this crapola all the time:

"Pours a _____ finger head."

I didn't realize this was a constant variable...
 
downtown3641 said:
Off topic, but I have to question how much you like something if you use it as an insult.
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Fortunately, Billy doesn't have to make daily posts to prove to his wife that he is a dedicated feminist. Billy wouldn't marry a femi-nazi unless she was smoking hot and into threesomes.
 
WesleyS said:
Not every beer pours with the same amount of head.
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I've always found that a bit goofy as well. Obviously some beers pour with more head than others, and that is worth reporting, but a ton of factors go into how much head you get. Glass shape and condition, temperature, how you pour, etc etc etc. I think it would be more honest to say that a beer has "lots of head" or "not much head" rather than a numerical measurement.


On the topic of overhearing strange things... not something specific, but a bunch of my friends are in the "just getting interested in craft beer" stage and you wouldn't believe the number of times I've explained that beers with fruity flavors do not necessarily contain fruit (grapefruit in IPAs, raisins/plums in dark beers, etc) and that wheat/rye/oatmeal beer is not typically made with 100% wheat/rye/oats. Seems like the importance of barley and hops is a bit hard for folks to grasp. :)
 
bleme said:
Fortunately, Billy doesn't have to make daily posts to prove to his wife that he is a dedicated feminist. Billy wouldn't marry a femi-nazi unless she was smoking hot and into threesomes.
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The viability of any given love triangle is all about who is chosen to complete the hypotenuse. Basically boils down to: my friend or hers?
 
wingedcoyote said:
I've always found that a bit goofy as well. Obviously some beers pour with more head than others, and that is worth reporting, but a ton of factors go into how much head you get. Glass shape and condition, temperature, how you pour, etc etc etc. I think it would be more honest to say that a beer has "lots of head" or "not much head" rather than a numerical measurement.
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Oh, I do agree that using the "fingers" unit of measure for the amount of head on a beer is strange. My comment was mainly in response to the last sentence in his post.
 
Its funny how in the UK most people think Carling Black Label is tasteless p!ss but something exotic like Coors or Budweiser is good beer. Grass is always greener :)
 
WesleyS said:
Oh, I do agree that using the "fingers" unit of measure for the amount of head on a beer is strange. My comment was mainly in response to the last sentence in his post.
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Sarcasm, my friend.

I just want to smack people when I hear (read) them review beers on BA and such talking about the finger measures of the head, as if they weren't arbitrary descriptors resulting from their particular pours.
 
splattsmier said:
Sarcasm, my friend.

I just want to smack people when I hear (read) them review beers on BA and such talking about the finger measures of the head, as if they weren't arbitrary descriptors resulting from their particular pours.
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That's why I try not to read reviews of beer on BA or ratebeer. Almost all of them could be mentioned in this thread. Like the reviews that list almost every flavor and aroma descriptor known to man as having been detected in the beer they're reviewing. A bunch hipster beer aficionado wannabes that have no clue what they're describing.
You can't deny though, that when poured the same and in the same glassware, different beers will produce different amounts of head. There are certain beers, like BCBS, that I pretty much dump in the glass trying to get some sort of head and barely get anything. But other beers at the same temp and glassware produce a lot of head even when poured gently. So it's not a completely useless description to include when describing a beer.
 
WesleyS said:
Oh, I do agree that using the "fingers" unit of measure for the amount of head on a beer is strange. My comment was mainly in response to the last sentence in his post.
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Whose fingers are they using to measure this head? I sure hope they wash their hands first.
 
DrunkleJon said:
Whose fingers are they using to measure this head? I sure hope they wash their hands first.
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I have my hands in all your beers.


With the notable exceptions of people who are exceptionally large or small, does finger width really differ that much between the rest of us?
 
GuldTuborg said:
I have my hands in all your beers.


With the notable exceptions of people who are exceptionally large or small, does finger width really differ that much between the rest of us?
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I thought I noticed something barnyard-y while drinking. I just thought I needed to be more meticulous in my glassware cleaning.

I have seen people with sausage fingers and skinny ones and all other. And think about ages, 3 fingers width for a 6 year old would be maybe 2 tops of a teenager.

And infant fingers would be measured in whole hands.

I am thinking too much. I need(want) a beer.
 
I was thinking the saying assumed a full grown adult, but perhaps I'm wrong on that.

So anyway, how many hands tall are you fine folks?
 
GuldTuborg said:
I was thinking the saying assumed a full grown adult, but perhaps I'm wrong on that.

So anyway, how many hands tall are you fine folks?
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I have fairly large hands but I would not consider my fingers to be exceptionally large, especially compared to my friend John in whose hands mine seem to disappear when we shake hands. John's hands seem to disappear into Bob's hands when they shake and if I shake hands with Bob, my hands look like I must be a midget. I think Bob's fingers were at least twice as wide as mine.
 
Sounds like my wife's grandpa. Her dad showed me his wedding band once. It was so huge it'd fit over my big toe with room to spare. The guy was easilly 6' 5",at least.
 
WesleyS said:
That's why I try not to read reviews of beer on BA or ratebeer. Almost all of them could be mentioned in this thread. Like the reviews that list almost every flavor and aroma descriptor known to man as having been detected in the beer they're reviewing. A bunch hipster beer aficionado wannabes that have no clue what they're describing.
You can't deny though, that when poured the same and in the same glassware, different beers will produce different amounts of head. There are certain beers, like BCBS, that I pretty much dump in the glass trying to get some sort of head and barely get anything. But other beers at the same temp and glassware produce a lot of head even when poured gently. So it's not a completely useless description to include when describing a beer.
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Oh yes I absolutely agree. I was just poking fun (with a sharp stick) at the Hipster wannabes lol.

Aaaaand another derailment success ... :ban:
 
From my dad, who is actually a fairy well-rounded beer drinker, and DOES drink good beer, just doesn't really know much about it:

"I usually don't like ales. I stick to lagers, stouts, and porters."
me: "you know stouts and porters are types of ale, right?"
him: "well if you really want to get picky and technical, I guess..."

*facepalm*
 
danath34 said:
From my dad, who is actually a fairy well-rounded beer drinker, and DOES drink good beer, just doesn't really know much about it:

"I usually don't like ales. I stick to lagers, stouts, and porters."
me: "you know stouts and porters are types of ale, right?"
him: "well if you really want to get picky and technical, I guess..."

*facepalm*
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Ive seen this come up a lot in this thread. To me when i know im speaking to someone who is somewhat familiar with beer and they use the word "ale" i tend to just assume they are referring to styles of beer that have the word ale within the name. Pale ale, IPA etc.

In a recent visit from my brother who i havent seen since before i started brewing a year or so back and is awesome At sounding like a jackass.

After us talking about the whole me making beer and showing him some of what i have going on in my brewing area.

Me: I've got this pretty good robust porter i made a while back in the fridge if you want to try some.

Him: If it ain't pilsner or lager its "basura".

:smack: i guess he should get points for knowing there is more than one kind of lager.
 
downtown3641 said:
Off topic, but I have to question how much you like something if you use it as an insult.
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I once called somebody a co**sucker in front of my future wife. Later she asked me why I'd insult somebody with a description of an activity I seemed to enjoy so much.
 
Ha, pretty much ALL of this review I mean they get the method of brewing wrong, make some ******* uneducated remarks about.....well pretty much everything.

My favourite comment was "I'm not really getting any hop characteristics at all!" (nods knowingly) ...... yeah you'll find that with a gruit because there's no effin hops in it!
 
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splattsmier said:
Oh yes I absolutely agree. I was just poking fun (with a sharp stick) at the Hipster wannabes lol.

Aaaaand another derailment success ... :ban:
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Sorry for the rambling in my post. I always wanted to be part of a derailment. :D
 
WesleyS said:
That's why I try not to read reviews of beer on BA or ratebeer. Almost all of them could be mentioned in this thread. Like the reviews that list almost every flavor and aroma descriptor known to man as having been detected in the beer they're reviewing. A bunch hipster beer aficionado wannabes that have no clue what they're describing.
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This. 1000x this.
 
Beer Advocate / Ratebeer can be a hilarious read... it is a good thing that it doesn't get derailed with off-topics otherwise this thread may shut down as all of us just head over there for our daily fix of hilarity :D
 
mcspanner said:
Ha, pretty much ALL of this review http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zGqV_6rljr0 I mean they get the method of brewing wrong, make some ******* uneducated remarks about.....well pretty much everything.

My favourite comment was "I'm not really getting any hop characteristics at all!" (nods knowingly) ...... yeah you'll find that with a gruit because there's no effin hops in it!
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I bet you could make a drinking game from those two. every time the guy with the ear gauges says, "Fer sure" you take a drink.
 
Between RateBeer and BA, I almost always choose BA. While both are filled with overly self confident tasters (so many 5's!), RateBeer seems to be REALLY harsh on everything.

elkshadow said:
John Stewart recently refered to beer as "fermented hops."
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Heard this, was in the living room alone and yelled at the TV.
 

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