Ok, so the wife and I are about a month away from going to China to adopt a beautiful 3 year old girl. We've got two bio boys and decided to add another kiddo, but in a different way this time. Here's a few things people have said to us, my response, and what I really wanted to say. Just in case any of you meet any other adoptive parents in the future!
1. How much does it cost to buy a baby?
"We aren't buying a baby, we're adopting a child. Of course there are certain expenses involved."
Wow. My father taught me at a young age not to ask people how much money they make or what they pay for certain things. Too bad yours didn't do the same. Are you asking because you want to write me a check? Checks are accepted.
2. Why didn't you just have another kid yourselves?
"We discussed having more children and are doing what we think is best for our family."
If you must know, my wife had two fairly risky pregnancies. One child was premature, with the other she was on bed rest for two months. Why don't you tell me intimate details about your wife's uterus now, since we're sharing?
3. There are plenty of kids in the US who need a home. You should have just adopted locally.
"Thank you for the advice. Again, we discussed many different ways of growing our family. This is what we decided to do."
Thanks, pal! Are you saying that my daughter is less worthy of having a family because she was born in a different country? Because that's what it sounds like you're saying.
4. Ok, this last one was related to my wife by a friend. The comment was made by an acquaintance.
"So, what do you think about the F's and their chink baby?"
If I ever personally hear you say that, I'll dig out your kidneys with a grapefruit spoon. I'm not kidding. I have a grapefruit spoon.
I hope this is an Ok place to vent. I've had a large bottle of biere de garde, so it seemed appropriate enough. I really do mean this to be somewhat humorous, these are only a few accumulated comments over the last year. I'm sure most people mean well, but some comments grate on me more than others. Cheers!
1. How much does it cost to buy a baby?
"We aren't buying a baby, we're adopting a child. Of course there are certain expenses involved."
Wow. My father taught me at a young age not to ask people how much money they make or what they pay for certain things. Too bad yours didn't do the same. Are you asking because you want to write me a check? Checks are accepted.
2. Why didn't you just have another kid yourselves?
"We discussed having more children and are doing what we think is best for our family."
If you must know, my wife had two fairly risky pregnancies. One child was premature, with the other she was on bed rest for two months. Why don't you tell me intimate details about your wife's uterus now, since we're sharing?
3. There are plenty of kids in the US who need a home. You should have just adopted locally.
"Thank you for the advice. Again, we discussed many different ways of growing our family. This is what we decided to do."
Thanks, pal! Are you saying that my daughter is less worthy of having a family because she was born in a different country? Because that's what it sounds like you're saying.
4. Ok, this last one was related to my wife by a friend. The comment was made by an acquaintance.
"So, what do you think about the F's and their chink baby?"
If I ever personally hear you say that, I'll dig out your kidneys with a grapefruit spoon. I'm not kidding. I have a grapefruit spoon.
I hope this is an Ok place to vent. I've had a large bottle of biere de garde, so it seemed appropriate enough. I really do mean this to be somewhat humorous, these are only a few accumulated comments over the last year. I'm sure most people mean well, but some comments grate on me more than others. Cheers!