The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

I'm going to beat the crowd to this one.

Da Fuq? I fit into a f/ing Tundra.

It does have a hook. I've used the hook and 15 feet of chain to pull more than one Ford or Chevy to safety.

I do have to say, other than a half dozen or so VW bugs I owned in the 70-80's, this is my first non-American vehicle. I'm pleased and will buy another when this one dies in another ten years or so.

Edit to add, I don't like the latest upgrade. Are you listening Keith? We KNOW you lurk here.

Hopefully the frame doesn't rot out from under that Tundra like its predecessors....

Never cared for the GM trucks. I would have considered a Raptor if they hadn't dumbed down the engine to a V6.

paulthenurse said:

I'm going to beat the crowd to this one.

Da Fuq? I fit into a f/ing Tundra.

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How tall are you?

I have the problem of when I put the seat ALL the way down, in my wife's 4Runner, (same size inside as a Tundra) my head hits the damn ceiling when I drive down a bumpy road. Or over Steelers fans.

They don't make good roads.

Master said:

How tall are you?

I have the problem of when I put the seat ALL the way down, in my wife's 4Runner, (same size inside as a Tundra) my head hits the damn ceiling when I drive down a bumpy road. Or over Steelers fans.

They don't make good roads.

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How tall are you? BigJohn drives a Ford Edge and he fits just fine.

6'5"

Master said:

6'5"

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That's not big.

I think you said tall dearest ...

Fine. That's not that tall.

paulthenurse said:

I'm going to beat the crowd to this one.

Da Fuq? I fit into a f/ing Tundra.

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They meant height... not girth dummy. And they meant in the cab... not the bed.

Melana said:

Fine. That's not that tall.

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...

Why do they include the drain hose but not the fill hoses with a new washing machine?

Somebody at the factory sat back and said “We can include both and save them a trip to the hardware store or we can include neither and increase our profits by $2.00 per unit. I’ve got an idea, let’s just include the drain hose. Without a hose clamp! That way we look like we’re taking care of the customer but in reality we’re screwing with them.”

That's so when the inline leaks or breaks and water is everywhere they aren't responsible. And yeah it's lame, we pay $400 or more for a new appliance then get hosed for the parts needed to install it.

Why couldn’t you reuse the one from the old washer?

Melana said:

Fine. That's not that tall.

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6'5" is plenty tall...what are you trying to humble brag about?

Bad idea. The washing machine hose is probably the weak link in any plumbing system. Probably should be routinely replaced every few years anyways. H2BM is probably right, plausible deniability is somehow involved.

I guess if you have the money to build a nice big pizza oven and have a backyard yacht you can replace your water hose more frequently, moneybags.

Having had to deal with my mom's rather large center entry colonial after a washer hose burst I highly recommend an easily reachable single lever dual valve shutoff for the washer and steel braided hoses.

What a fricken' nightmare that was...

They actual sell a timer shutoff. Start your wash, hit the timer and it will shutoff after a set time. Then again it's another point of failure that you probably have to replace after a year.

Then again you can buy a sensor for your connected home that could shutoff your water main once it senses water.

bluemoose said:

I guess if you have the money to build a nice big pizza oven and have a backyard yacht you can replace your water hose more frequently, moneybags.

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I‘d be willing to loan ya the ten bucks. Aww. Wtf, I’ll give ya the ten bucks.

Edited...

Nah.... forget what I just said. But call me and we can discuss interest rates.

TheDudeLebowski said:

They actual sell a timer shutoff. Start your wash, hit the timer and it will shutoff after a set time. Then again it's another point of failure that you probably have to replace after a year.

Then again you can buy a sensor for your connected home that could shutoff your water main once it senses water.

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Is that kind of like the waterproof doors on the Titanic?
‘Sure, the water might flood a few compartments but it’s bombproof! You’re gonna love it!’

Nope. Just a little bit of water on the floor and the main valve will shut off immediately. If you have a sump pump you could put it there.

aaaand my aunt just got back from vacationing in New Zealand to a basement full of water.

That sux

It certainly does.

I meant about Auntie vacationing in New Zealand while DL was stuck here in the subzero weather. I say it serves the old girl right.

That's why you are king Masshole, Paul. Dilly dilly!

In the future, please remember to capitalize the K or you’ll be off to The Pit of Misery, otherwise known as Cleveland.

Funny you should say that Sire, I have already stayed in the pit known as Cleveland twice, and it truly was miserable. Imagine traveling to Ft Lauterdale for a cruise having to change planes in said city, to find snow and cancelations. Brrr, the crappy hotel the airline paid for had no restaurant and limited TV for Mr Merry. We walked in our spring attire through the snow for sustenance and libations of which there was mostly dilly dilly pisswasser.

You willing went to Cleveland. You deserve no pity for the sh!thole you found yourself in. To the Pit of Misery.

C is a different world. Good people, beer and food can be had. It does have it's own smell so to say.

The Mistake on the Lake. Remember when Oil Can Boyd said "That's what happens when you build a ballpark next to the ocean." after getting fogged out at the Jake. When Oil Can Boyd can dis you and not even know he's doing it, it's time to make radical changes.

I must confess, that both times I did not get out to see the city. The first time I was also on the outskirts stopping for the night and dodging a creepy truck driver my first time driving to Nebraska. He had a smell all his own too.

TheDudeLebowski said:

C is a different world. Good people, beer and food can be had. It does have it's own smell so to say.

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Even I have sense enough to not go there.

Well there is the not being able to see the sun until spring, due to lake effect clouds.

I would think that would be a plus.

Yeager “just can’t understand” why Jim Koch got a restraining order.
I say the reason is self evident.

Jesus

Cape Brewing said:

Jesus

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God help us all ...

He’s waiting for you guys to launch Bog Iron wear. That will launch a whole new level of creepy.