The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

paulthenurse said:

Fill the panty hose with ice melt and lay them down top to bottom so when the ice melts it can run down the roof. Otherwise it builds up and backs up causing all number of problems.

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Make sure your using calcium chloride.

Happy Fat Tuesday!

Melana said:

Happy Fat Tuesday!

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so just a normal PTN tuesday

Melana said:

Happy Fat Tuesday!

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Damn. I had no idea. I need to get one of those N'Orleans calendars. You know, they include Mardee Grah, Fat Toosday, and how much bounty you can get for each opponent you knock out of the game.

Oh wait, that'd be cheating. Only New England does that........

**** you, people of Alabama. For many reasons, but for today, **** you for this.

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_p3eDSX6X2U[/ame]

Ahahahahaha! That video was apparently so outrageous the originating teevee site actually took it down from their own pages, not just Youtube!

Even without it, I can't argue the premise...

Cheers!

Hey give Cooter and Bubba a break. It's going down to 17 degrees there tonight. That's cold no matter where you live.

Wonder if they pulled down their Facebook page, too?

Holy moly.

"It's so cold you can freeze water outside!!!"
GTFO!

paulthenurse said:

"It's so cold you can freeze water outside!!!"
GTFO!

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Thanks Paul... I just read that and heard you saying it. I needed the laugh this morning!

I mean, let's be fair to them. It's Alabama. It's not like they get a lot of science education down there. This is advanced stuff!

I just can't deal with this friggin' cold any more. It's supposed to be 38° on Sunday; I might dance around the backyard naked.

We going fishing this summer, Paulie? We're spending a week down on the Cape this year. Can't ****ing wait, I'll tell you that.

I bet your neighbors are going to love that. You should wear the bunny ears.

And we're absolutely going fishing. We might even catch something. No promises. When is your week?

Late July. The last week, I think. We're renting a place in East Falmouth with some friends.

It's chilly out

July?!??! The ice will probably be gone by then. Plus, you'll never leave the dockside bar with Paulie being uncomfortable with the summer waitstaff.

I was very comfortable with the wait staff.

Hey Paul... nice article!

Heineken!?!?

What's a matter? Stella too "yeasty" for you?

You did a Utopia clone? :fro:

I liked the article. It's been far too long since we've seen MegaTun in the wild!

the_bird said:

I liked the article. It's been far too long since we've seen MegaTun in the wild!

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Now we know what happens at night when you 'spend the night on Paulie's couch'!

by the way, there is such a thing as an imperial mild, at least to northern brewer...

http://www.northernbrewer.com/documentation/allgrain/AG-ImperialMild.pdf

the_bird said:

I liked the article. It's been far too long since we've seen MegaTun in the wild!

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Gold

Jay... Go watch that vid I just dropped in the football thread.

Chills.

I love the paint mixer attachment to the drill... TWO pictures of it... the fcking tun is 15 inches deep but you gotta get the Dewalt drill out. "OH MAN!!! I CAN'T STIR THIS MASH... OHHHH... SOOOO HARD TO STIR!!"

(Shaking my head in more digust than usual)

and i took that picture

Now that I'm even more famous and exalted than before I'll take the high road....

Nah. F that! Hey Slapnuts, you talked crap for WEEKS in advance of that day about how that mash was going to seize up like concrete. You talked so much **** about something that you knew absolutely nothing about you could have been Hoppy. Or did you try to stuff that memory, like so many others, where you talk a bunch of **** and point fingers and ended up totally wrong. Again.

Shhhhhhh... PRO brewer here. shhhhh

Fckin' Heineken... I shouldn't even have to fcking respond after that.

"Ewwwww I made one awesome batch of Utopias and couldn't replicate it again... but look at what a big mash tun I built! It was a huge success!! Wait.... what??"

speaking of that... I paid cash for U2... where's my share you fcku!!?!?

Cape Brewing said:

Shhhhhhh... PRO brewer here. shhhhh

Fckin' Heineken... I shouldn't even have to fcking respond after that.

"Ewwwww I made one awesome batch of Utopias and couldn't replicate it again... but look at what a big mash tun I built! It was a huge success!! Wait.... what??"

speaking of that... I paid cash for U2... where's my share you fcku!!?!?

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like youll ever see any of that

"Oh Bri... you're going out to the NHC!??1 please please please please share the one bottle of U1 with everyone and make sure you tell them I made it... by myself!!! Oh I'll toooootally replace it!!!"

Funny... don't remember seeing that replacement.

And where's my stinkin' Costco card?

The U2 is sitting on wood chips in my closet. Right now it's around 190 proof and needs to be diluted. You'll get it. Relax, Spanky.

I'll trade you the Costco card for my share

You're holding my f'ing Costco card hostage? What are you, f'ing ISIS?

Cape Brewing said:

Shhhhhhh... PRO brewer here. shhhhh

Fckin' Heineken... I shouldn't even have to fcking respond after that.

"Ewwwww I made one awesome batch of Utopias and couldn't replicate it again... but look at what a big mash tun I built! It was a huge success!! Wait.... what??"

speaking of that... I paid cash for U2... where's my share you fcku!!?!?

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Mutton chops still owes me a new bottle of Utopias, since we drank mine. I didn't pay for it though. I won it in some homebrew competition....

Hey ISIS, I just figured out why you've got such a hair across your arse...

I'll send Austin a PM and ask him to go back and edit the interview and change Heineken to Bog Iron and Amsterdam to Norton,

Edit request submitted.

paulthenurse said:

The U2 is sitting on wood chips in my closet. Right now it's around 190 proof and needs to be diluted. You'll get it. Relax, Spanky.

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Speaking of, where's my barley brandy, Cape?