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Oh god...

_wsb_550x381_caliwinefest4.jpg

We had a overwhelming response to our CandyBeers at the Cailfornia Wine Festival In Santa Barbara, Ca, lots of fun people, wines and of course BEERS!

Looks like they were lined up there, eh?

So what is this stuff? Alcoholic faygo?
 
Oh god...


So what is this stuff? Alcoholic faygo?

"NEW TNA "Red Hawaiian Pineapple Candy Ale" is a Wet, Smooth, Red Hawaiian CandyBeer with a Pineapple Sting Of flavor and aroma of assorted fruits coming from natural & artifical hard candy flavors. At about 4.5 ABV, this delicious beer, taste great by itself, or with almost any food pairings. We Do's It Big At TNA....!"


So there you go. If it wasn't 45 bucks to make a growler of the stuff I'd suggest somebody buy one and write up a report.
 
Did they really just describe the beer as wet?

Yes he did....

I dunno, but suddenly I have a hankering to put some Barry White on my 8-track, pull out a 40 and get my Billy Dee on....

billydee.jpg


But of course with a "Pineapple Sting Of flavor and aroma of assorted fruits coming from natural & artifical hard candy flavors." :fro:
 
I've been trying to find some mention of this horror outside of the actualy website...I've found one, though I think this is a paid pr piece more than anything else.

Umbrellas and Beer - TNA CandyBeers Coming To A Citi/Town Near You!
TNA Hard Candy Ale is a Smooth, Sweet/Sour Champange CandyBeer with the champagne flavor and aroma of assorted fruits coming from natural & artifical hard candy flavors. At about 6.5 ABV, this delicious beer, taste great by itself or with any food...




FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
PRLog (Press Release) – Jul 24, 2010 – Umbrellas and Beer

by Hank Truxillo

Woodland Hills, Ca: Whenever I settle into that oversized rattan chair underneath the spinning bamboo fan at my favorite Polynesian restaurant, before I order my crispy prawns or teriyaki chicken, I make my first order of business to select a perfect, fruit-flavored, refreshing tropical drink in a hurricane glass, topped with the little fold-out umbrella, with two cherries and an orange slice.

If I am sitting outside, I have my straw Panama hat with my dark sunglasses, feeling very much like Sydney Greenstreet in an old tropical island treasure hunt movie. The only unfortunate element to the story is that I occasionally prefer beer, and the flavor of beer just doesn’t allow for little umbrellas.

Until now.

Coming to the TikiFest at the Warner Center in Woodland Hills is TNA Hard Candy Ale. This is the perfect ale for that tropical Polynesian atmosphere; a special treat since it is the only candy ale brewed by Ty Armstrong Sr in the Western United States, and until recently has been only available to private parties. It’s a dry, sweet champagne-flavored beer with hints of tropical fruits coming from hard candies.

You’ve had your standard run of tropical drinks. How often do you get to taste something unique in the perfect setting? Come on down to Woodland Hills Saturday, August 14 and taste for yourself.

We’ll even put a little umbrella in it.

www.tikifest.net
www.tnacandybeer.com
[email protected]
(805) 461-(TNAC) 8622
 
You guys joke around with this all you want, but let me tell you something: I tried making my own beer one time and wound up with herpes!

I wonder if I can use this in the future. "It's not my fault, honey, it's that beer you drank."
 
You guys joke around with this all you want, but let me tell you something: I tried making my own beer one time and wound up with herpes!

Laughing gnome invisibile, are you posting under another alias again...oh wait, he was the one that gave his beer herpes, by using is wang as a hydrometer.:p
 
A classic hbt thread!!! I kept trying to bump it back on occasion, but the mood I guess had to be right.


Off I go to read it and laugh.

I thought about bumping it but figured I would give you the honor. I just read through the last few pages of it.
 
My Dad told me that if I played with my beer that I would go blind. Someone in HBT said that Palmer was quoted saying the same thing. Always listen to your parents...
 
**** you HomeBrewTalk. All I get is spam for Viagara, and free iPhone 4's I can't use on Verizon's network, and offers for a work at home job when I have a job that lets me work at home making more money than they are offering. **** you. I want YOUR quality of spam.
:drunk: :drunk:
 
I think I want to try my hand at this beer making stuff now. I just found this on the internets so it must be good.

instaBeer.jpg


Introducing Insta-Beer
The world's first instant beer, available exclusively at KegWorks!
Insta-Beer is revolutionizing the alcohol industry. After years of research,
thousands of trial runs and plenty of hangovers, a dedicated team of German
scientists has perfected a groundbreaking formula for powdered beer.
In less than 60 seconds, each packet makes one 12-ounce serving of
damn good beer. Simply combine the patented brew powder with ice-cold water
for an outstanding glass of the good stuff. It's every bit as enjoyable as your
favorite bottle or can, for a fraction of the price.
Grab 12 Insta-Beer packets for just $7.95

What People Are Saying
"For years I've fantasized about an
instant beer! This product is nothing
short of incredible. Slip a packet
into your pocket and you can have
a great beer anywhere!"

-Marc, Beer Connoisseur, NYC
"The results are more impressive
than some of the pricey craft beers
I've had recently - and all you need
is water. It's almost too good to
be true!"
-Otto, Dumpfbacke Brewery, Germany

It doesn't seem like it's too much work....I don't like doing too much work.
It looks like instant breakfast, I like instant breakfast. All you have to do is stir the instant breakfast powder into a glass of milk, and you get all your bacon and eggs and toast in one glass, without having to crack eggs and stuff.

If you want to make beer at home maybe you want to try this. http://www.kegworks.com/company/insta-beer

Here's the real deal [COLOR="LemonChiffon"]http://www.kegworks.com/company/got-ya?source=instaBeer[/COLOR]:)
 
As sad as Insta-Beer sounds, it's too f-ed up not to try. I'm gonna buy some and let y'all know. Who knows, maybe if I like it, I can sell al my equipment and cut mybrew day down from hours to minutes.

This gives new meaning to BIAB!
 
Insta-Beer and an easy wife... now we're gettin' somewhere!

http://www.theonion.com/articles/easy-wife-gives-it-up-on-first-date-night,18110/

Easy Wife Gives It Up On First Date Night
SEPTEMBER 20, 2010 | ISSUE 46•38

OMAHA, NE—Local man James Carlson totally got some Friday night when his wife, Shelly, "went all the way" after just one date night, the lucky husband reported. "I figured it'd be at least three date nights before she gave it up, but all it took was a modest dinner and a few glasses of wine, and she went straight home with me, no questions asked," Carlson said of his wife of eight years, with whom he has three children, James Jr., 7, Wendy, 5, and Sandy, 3. "After we paid the babysitter and brushed our teeth, she couldn't keep her hands off me." Carlson hopes to continue date-nighting his wife for the foreseeable future, seeing as she is such an easy lay.
 

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