The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

Yakima 728
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paulthenurse said:
He's got a nice little lineup of meads out for sale. Unfortunately, it's all a little hot because of the nature of mead. What startup business can afford to sit on it's product for the five years plus it takes before meads lose that medicinal hotness?
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If it takes 5 years to lose it's hotness, you're doing it wrong. Sacchromyces is getting his drinkable in ~6 weeks. Staggered nutrient additions and filtering goes a long ways...

This one was made in January 10, 2010; hit FG by February 12, and had cleared by May.

paulthenurse said:
Good for you though AZ. You were judged by someone who knows what they are judging. Let's face it, 95% of the time mead gets judged by beer guys who have a light day as skiffs. "Hey Joe, since you are only judging light lagers and milds today, can you and Fred do the meads too?"
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The best part is that I took incredibly detailed notes during the creation of this beast (rare for me, since I'm lazy), so I can actually make it again. It was cool to have a pro-mazer say "don't change a thing, and let's chat more about this recipe."

paulthenurse said:
And just ignore Rick, we all do.
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Noted. :D
 
paulthenurse said:
Does Sac have a thread describing his process!
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Is that a question or an emphatic statement?

I don't think he's written it up on here. But in my discussions with him, Schramm, and some other pro mazers, it boils (and please don't boil the must) down to this:

- quality honey (not that fake Chinese **** from Wal-Mart
- aerate the must a metric **** tonne (to use Cape's terms)
- pitch 1-2g/gallon of yeast, rehydrated in GoFerm
- don't use EC-1118
- use staggered nutrient additions (see hightest's sticky in the mead forum)
- ferment at 62*F
- degas often

I don't filter, so my turn around isn't as quick as Sacc's (I like to let it clear before packaging), but he had some 21 day old mead at NHC last year that was amazing!
 
AZ_IPA said:
Is that a question or an emphatic statement?
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Nah, it sitting in the sun outside of my mechanic's shop typing on an iPhone and not being able to see my typo's.

Way cool thoughts on the advanced schedule. I have a 4/5's full 5 gallon tub of Maine wildflower honey sitting around gathering dust. Score!

And congrats on your way cool entry, I hope to try some at Masstoberfest. You ARE coming to Masstoberfest THIS year aren't you?

P
 
Since I'm not going to NHC this year, I can probably swing a trip across the country to hang out with a bunch of dudes I met on the interwebz :drunk: :fro:

At least I know you all don't look like your avatars. Well, except for Cape.
 
Hey,

can anyone else tell me why losing just 1 hour over the weekend is causing me to have a second Monday morning this week? Of course, it might be because SWMBO and I went to a brand new bar that opened in Nashua, Noo Hamshah (BTW,please note the correct spelling from someone who actually lives here.....). Highlight of the place (at least for my wife) is that they have 100 wines on "tap", that they sell by the 1.5 oz tasting, 3 0z 1/2 glass, or 6 oz. half glass. All the wines are from California, but they don't have a single CA IPA, on tap, or bottle. F'ing winos. Anywhoo, we get the bill, and it's $147....turns out my lovely wife was just looking at the left side of the menu, where the names of the wines were, and not the F'ing right side of the menu, that printed a little thing called PRICE.

I'll pay $21/glass if I have to, but I kinda like it when the person knows they're drinking $21/glass wine, and not $6-8/glass.

Sorry, rant over. Can't wait for Tuesday to get here.

Speaking of Tuesday, what's the topic of tonight's meeting? Bad Beer Tastes, or Tasting Beer in the Right Glass?
 
Paul... Please. If Az is going to visit the area are you really, with a straight face, suggest "Masstoberfest"? Really??

Az... Don't worry. I'll send you some details on a real cookout/beer event.
 
Cape Brewing said:
Paul... Please. If Az is going to visit the area are you really, with a straight face, suggest "Masstoberfest"? Really??

Az... Don't worry. I'll send you some details on a real cookout/beer event.
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Are you planning to deep fry a 400lbs pig again?
 
The pit isnt THAT big.

Speaking of the NIHFC... Can I even enter this year??? You know, since I'm a pro now??

Jesus... I'm gonna have THE preeminent homebrew "festival" in Massachusetts (go ahead... Name another one that has more than 31 tapsflowing) at my house and I can't even enter a beer in the comp?!

That's weak.

I say as long as I brew it at home and not on our professional equipment then it should be fine. Although I admit I will feel bad when I win. Kinda like Albert Pujols winning a whiffleball tourney... Well... duh... What did you expect?
 
Wow, I think this is the earliest "Tit Wednesday" I can recall (and it's a Thursday this year!). Nubile young hottie just walked by the office in a little sundress; it's a LITTLE chilly out for her to be dressed like that, but I'm not complaining.
 
Cape Brewing said:
Sht. C'mon Pauly, you know how to track me down...
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I know but I always feel weird going into those drag bars of yours and walking out with you dressed in your 'special party outfits'. People look at me funny when we walk down the street. I know, I know, I'm the one with the issue, but still...
 
I just started to do one of your moves and googled "image ugly drag queen" but im sitting at a bar realized that the union laborer on my left and the bus mechanic on my right would probably kick my ass before I could post those pics.

Potential for busting Capes ass 4/10

Potential for the twin Archie Bunkers to kick my ass 11/10

I decided to cut you some slack.
 
paulthenurse said:
I just started to do one of your moves and googled "image ugly drag queen" but im sitting at a bar realized that the union laborer on my left and the bus mechanic on my right would probably kick my ass before I could post those pics.

Potential for busting Capes ass 4/10

Potential for the twin Archie Bunkers to kick my ass 11/10

I decided to cut you some slack.
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Yeah, I bet you left the bar to google those pics. You just have to look at 'em, don't you.
 
I'm going with the theory that you can have three pints of Guinness for every wedge of cabbage and two per six ounces of corned beef. Turnips and parsnips don't count, and just take up room, so they'll get left in the pot till tomorrow's breakfast.



Assuming I'm still alive tomorrow morning.
 
ESB, Flanders Red, Stella Artois, Black IPA, Bigfoot blend 2008, 2009, & 2010, American IPA, I think that's it. In bed now.
 
CornyKegs 300

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