The scourges of summer: heavy girls in bikinis and flip flops

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i absolutely cannot stand flip flops on a girl, and actually one of my persistent, and admittingly stupid "demands" with swmbo is that she does NOT under any circumstances wear flip flops anywhere, with the exception of being on a beach. not even in our own pool will i allow it. the only slight exception to this rule is if the flip flop is one of those fat, chunky sort of heeled flip flops, almost like a platform/wedge flip flop, but the run of the mill walmart flip flops, hell no. womens legs look longer, sexier, sleeker, and just overall better in a heel, wedge, of some sort. it stretches the calf muscles, and is just hot as hell, were flip flops look lazy, unkempt, and kind of makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit. i on the other hand, wear my flip flops practically all weekend long, out at the pool, messing around in the bar or the garage. they really only leave my feet if i'm going out somewhere to eat/drink, or golfing. :drunk:

sexist? probably.
stupid? yes
does it make any sense? no
can't help it though. she knew this little nuance of mine way before we got married, i practically had a clause to enforce it written into the marriage license.
 
Just in response to the flip-flops at work debate...

My wife's cousin, who works in financial services (on a trading desk) was asked to cease wearing his spurs to work after he visted Texas. He lives in Boston.

True story.
This is awesome. I should try wearing spurs to work and see what they say. **** like that is funny!

i absolutely cannot stand flip flops on a girl, and actually one of my persistent, and admittingly stupid "demands" with swmbo is that she does NOT under any circumstances wear flip flops anywhere, with the exception of being on a beach. not even in our own pool will i allow it. the only slight exception to this rule is if the flip flop is one of those fat, chunky sort of heeled flip flops, almost like a platform/wedge flip flop, but the run of the mill walmart flip flops, hell no. womens legs look longer, sexier, sleeker, and just overall better in a heel, wedge, of some sort. it stretches the calf muscles, and is just hot as hell, were flip flops look lazy, unkempt, and kind of makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit. i on the other hand, wear my flip flops practically all weekend long, out at the pool, messing around in the bar or the garage. they really only leave my feet if i'm going out somewhere to eat/drink, or golfing. :drunk:

sexist? probably.
stupid? yes
does it make any sense? no
can't help it though. she knew this little nuance of mine way before we got married, i practically had a clause to enforce it written into the marriage license.
Wow, sorry, but...well.....I think that makes you quite the *******!! :D My wife would laugh hysterically if I "forbid" her from doing anything shy of sleeping around. A would I if it were the other way around.
 
Wow, sorry, but...well.....I think that makes you quite the *******!! :D My wife would laugh hysterically if I "forbid" her from doing anything shy of sleeping around. A would I if it were the other way around.


meh, to each his/her own. I, for example, really don't care if she sleeps around, just as long as she isn't doing it in flip flops. it also helps to point out that she really hates flip flops on girls too, and she shares in my obsession against them, and is actually the treasurer of our little coalation, the S.B.A.F.F.U., (sexy b*tches against flip flops united) wich last year alone, destroyed over 12 pairs of flip flops just in the central indiana region, and converted three F.F.F.W.'s (former flip flop wearers) into bonafied chapter leaders themselves.
 
meh, to each his/her own. I, for example, really don't care if she sleeps around, just as long as she isn't doing it in flip flops. it also helps to point out that she really hates flip flops on girls too, and she shares in my obsession against them, and is actually the treasurer of our little coalation, the S.B.A.F.F.U., (sexy b*tches against flip flops united) wich last year alone, destroyed over 12 pairs of flip flops just in the central indiana region, and converted three F.F.F.W.'s (former flip flop wearers) into bonafied chapter leaders themselves.
I love you. No, seriously, I think I have a man-crush on you. Smooches. :p
 
So ya don't like to see the big girls in the teenie-weenie-polka-dot-bikini's huh?

Meh.

Not too fond of the flip-flops? Ooooh You're gonna love these;

FiveFingers-786859.jpg


and I hate to break it to ya' but the only people who think walking barefoot is bad for the feet are the ones selling shoes. Now a days, science and medicin are taking a flip. Now there are whole communities of people who call themselves "Foot Nudists".

I think it all started in LA.

There was(Were) a study(s) released not long ago (I think I read it on digg) that said that running shoes did nothing beyond bare feet to protect runners from any injury.
 
I think the bikini thing is a by-product of the "everyone is special, everyone is perfect" child-raising.

The flip-flops? No clue, I like having my feet in shoes. Don't like heavy shoes? Don't wear skater shoes all the time :) Personally, if I'm not going to be standing around, by Piloti driving shoes are extremely comfortable and light.
 
meh, to each his/her own. I, for example, really don't care if she sleeps around, just as long as she isn't doing it in flip flops. it also helps to point out that she really hates flip flops on girls too, and she shares in my obsession against them, and is actually the treasurer of our little coalation, the S.B.A.F.F.U., (sexy b*tches against flip flops united) wich last year alone, destroyed over 12 pairs of flip flops just in the central indiana region, and converted three F.F.F.W.'s (former flip flop wearers) into bonafied chapter leaders themselves.

I wouldn't exactly call that forbidding her then.:p Just lucky that she has teh same opinion as you, but you keep that club in hand just incase! :mug:
 
My opinion on flip flops has changed as I just learned of the dram sandal :tank:

Squirrel away three ounces of your favorite beverage inside the heel of each of these Reef Dram Sandals, giving you a total of four generous shots of courage afoot wherever you may roam. Looks like a great way to keep your sanity—that is, if you don't mind your single malt tasting a bit like feet.

We like this Reef company, one that keeps besotted wretches such as your heavily sedated Gizmodo team in mind. You may remember its first foray into drinking and walking with its bottle opener sandals, and now there's these $45 Dram Sandals that are available in three earthy colors. Just be sure to empty the contents of their internal flasks before placing them on that airport security conveyor belt. – Charlie White
 
I'll tell you one thing...I HATE FLIP FLOPS. I won't even wear them to the beach. On the beach, its barefoot.

EDIT - I should clarify. I don't have a problem with flip flops, I am just not comfortable in them as I don't like something between my toe.
 
You are all so unhip, I don't know if I can hang with youz anymore. Well, ok, I'll stick around but I'll just hide you all from my bikini and flipflop wearing BBW hotties . . .
 
I don't understand why you people don't like flip flops or fat women. I have a pair of Reef sandals that have a bottle opener on them and another pair that has a stash spot perfect for joints. I mix up the two pairs and they make a trip to the beach a lot more convienent and enjoyable. As for fat girls, in my experience, it's the fat ones that do more. :)
 
What's the saying? Pics or GTFO? Or is it STFU? Can't recall..this thread is quite useless without pics for reference though. :) And I don't mean toe shoes.
 
I don't understand why you people don't like flip flops or fat women. I have a pair of Reef sandals that have a bottle opener on them and another pair that has a stash spot perfect for joints. I mix up the two pairs and they make a trip to the beach a lot more convienent and enjoyable. As for fat girls, in my experience, it's the fat ones that do more. :)

Yah, those Mick Fannings are the sheeez. I've had the same pair for almost three years and they only get more comfortable with time.

Everyone seems to be bashing sandals, but what about docksiders/boat shoes?? C'mon, that's the real enemy here. Even though they're really comfortable, they look stupid. Especially without socks and some weird neon colored polo to boot. I'm just saying is all. The worst possible combo in my opinion? A heavy set woman, who has no business wearing scant clothing, walking around in docksiders, a daisy duke thong made from khaki shorts, and a super tight neon orange polo with the mid-drift cut out. I actually had a nightmare last night that I was stuck in a grocery store and one of these was chasing me.
 
I like em' a little "chunky" myself. :eek: (The women... not the shoes.)

And apparently, I'm not alone: Figures reveal that given the choice, most men will plump for a curvy girl

Women are supposed to have curves. Sorry if it bothers you. But hey, one man's trash is another man's treasure.

As far as the flops go: I've heard this rant before and I just don't get it. I don't have a shoe fetish/phobia. So I don't spend much time looking at a woman's feet. And I couldn't care less what a man puts on his feet. (As long as they don't stink...)

$.02
 
I DEFINITELY prefernumber #3 but, that isn't to say I'd pass on #1 as an appetizer, or #2 as the main course.
I'm more for a #3 myself.

Just need to clarify my OP. I don't have a thing against heavy girls. Hell, I prefer them with meat on their bones. I just don't want to see the meat stressing the casing in public, capice? :D
 
i'm not sure if i prefer 1, 2, or 3 better. they should all turn around, and then i could maybe narrow it down between two of them, and then i'd have to see what they looked like on all fours looking back at me with that, i'm kind of scared, but please don't stop, look in their eyes to officially make a decision.
 
I'm more for a #3 myself.

Just need to clarify my OP. I don't have a thing against heavy girls. Hell, I prefer them with meat on their bones. I just don't want to see the meat stressing the casing in public, capice? :D

I am always looking to have my thing against heavy girls. It's the restraining orders that cause the problems there.

To be honest, I really don't find anything attractive about #1 and if marriage were a potential I'd go with #2. Because a ring adds like, what, 30 pounds?

Don't want to see the meat stressing the casing in public eh? But you'll roll her in flour in the privacy of your own home? I see what you are doing there!

;):p
 
I am always looking to have my thing against heavy girls. It's the restraining orders that cause the problems there.

To be honest, I really don't find anything attractive about #1 and if marriage were a potential I'd go with #2. Because a ring adds like, what, 30 pounds?

Don't want to see the meat stressing the casing in public eh? But you'll roll her in flour in the privacy of your own home? I see what you are doing there!

;):p
No. 1 is way too skinny. She'd break. Eat a friggin' burger or 12. No. 2 sorta looks like my ex-wife, so, no thank you.

OK, I like 'em with meat on their bones. I draw the line at the need for baking ingredients. :p
 
I'd do all three .

I'd take 2 and 3 over 1 as 1 is way skinny (and yes, looks like she'd break) and her anorexia has caused her to have nothing up top.

I'm sure they all have very nice personalities though.
 
All three at least look to take good care of themselves which (IMO) is as important as anything.

I mean there's a difference between 'Athletic' (good) and 'crack whore' (bad) just like there's a difference between 'shoves twinkies in like they're tic-tacs' (bad) vs 'well rounded like the good lord built her' (good).
 
1 or 2 for me. #3 is just too, too much.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGEsi6y0Ib4&feature=PlayList&p=9BCB42ADF9581284&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=20]YouTube - Drew Carey & Frankie Yankovic - Too Fat Polka[/ame]


(sorry about the Drew Carey, it's the only clean audio I could find)
 
Straying from the original topic but tangentially related, no dude should EVER wear sandals into a bar/pub/restaurant unless it is directly adjacent to a beach. Even then I cringe a bit.
 
Gimme #3.

Back boobs though are a bit much. Unless you're doing her doggy style and have short arms.

I go barefoot all the time at home and in the yard. Walk around to neighbors barefoot. I got feet like a troll mated with a hobbit but, they are tough enough to walk without sissy shoes.

Oh, and if you're chic don't like doggy style, it's probably because of the name. Call it lamb style or something cute. Not horse shoe crab style.
 
Gimme #3.

Back boobs though are a bit much. Unless you're doing her doggy style and have short arms.

I go barefoot all the time at home and in the yard. Walk around to neighbors barefoot. I got feet like a troll mated with a hobbit but, they are tough enough to walk without sissy shoes.

Oh, and if you're chic don't like doggy style, it's probably because of the name. Call it lamb style or something cute. Not horse shoe crab style.

Exactly, you just have to trick them into trying it, once they realize they like it, they'll get over the name
 
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