Harmless ways to keep folks on their toes

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CreamyGoodness

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Another data dump of mindless Monday drivel. I'm trying to keep my mind off the heinous head-cold I have.

Here are a few ways to mess with people that dont involve startling them or causing them physical or emotional pain.

- Get on the highway in New Jersey and get to a point where the toll booths get pretty closely placed. At the first toll booth you go through, pay for the car that comes after you. Don't worry, it'll be cheap. You now have a companion who will follow you for miles trying to figure out how you know him.

- Introduce your young son to people as "Mohandas"

- Order a pizza and ask if you can get two of the little plastic tables in the box instead of one.

- Shave your eyebrows off. This one takes some dedication but it could be worth it if your office is otherwise droll. Coworkers will squint, knowing that something is amiss but quite sure what it is.

- Excitedly ask your kids if you can borrow their Justin Bieber "cassette." The idea here is to make them think YOU think it is "cool." If you do this right, going forward, they will hate Justin Bieber.

- Ask a buddy if you can borrow a dollar. If they agree, take the dollar and say "thanks, Ill give it right back to you". Come back 10 minutes later, and give them back the same dollar. Extra effective if the dollar had a noticable rip or identifying mark upon it. (This one actually happened to me, still no clue what happened...)

- Convince your wife you fantasize about her in carhart overalls and hip waders. If she comes to bed dressed in them, Congrats! Your wife is a sweetheart and you are an *******.

- Wash out a mayo jar extremely well. Fill with vanilla pudding. Eat with a spoon at the office (SWMBO is another valid target/victim).

- This one is more effective in semi-urban to urban areas, but will work in the country as well. In the kitchen, leave out a crust of bread with a few peppercorns next to it. Less is more. If SWMBO takes the bait she will chastise you for bringing mice into the kitchen, and point out the "droppings". At this time, take one of the peppercorns and pop it into your mouth.
*Warning* this is the one and only time my fiance has ever hit me.

- Order delivery online and in the special requests box add something moronic like "can I get 10 budweiser bottle caps?" or "can the delivery guy sing happy birthday". "Please draw a picture on the box" works too but its been done to death. If your request is fulfilled (and sometimes, believe it or not, it will be trust me) tip well. You are trying to be an idiot, not an *******.

I think thats enough to get you started. Enjoy.

:ban::drunk:
 
- Wash out a mayo jar extremely well. Fill with vanilla pudding. Eat with a spoon at the office (SWMBO is another valid target/victim).

I like this one A LOT!
 
I really doubt you can even buy a Bieber cassette. Do your kids even know what one is?
 
I dont have kids, but the word "cassette" would be used to remind them of how old you are... really ups your lack of coolness factor...
 
I shave my eyebrows then draw them back on with a sharpie.

I alternate between surprised and disappointed as my mood fits.
 
Run frantically into a shop on a Sunday, stop in front of the counter, yell, "ARE YOU OPEN ON THURSDAY?" When they say, "Uh...yes," run out of the shop without another word.
 
I personally like to order a pizza but ask for it to be cut only into 4 slices because we aren't that hungry.

You can go with 16 slices too because you are really hungry.
 
I just threw out a mayo jar last night (runs to garbage). Tonight is gonna be fun.

-Sit in a parking lot facing traffic, wearing sunglasses and holding a hair dryer like a radar gun. (Do it at your own risk).

-When the drive through cashier asks if that is everything, make sure they know your order is to go
 
Take some electrical tape or transparent tape and tape down the trigger on the sprayer on your kitchen sink. Aim the sprayer toward where the next person who uses the sink will be standing when they turn on the water.

When I was younger, I had my old man standing at the sink for a good 5 seconds getting drenched when he finally shut the faucet off!:ban:
 
I don't exactly work with people who use a computer as a primary tool for their employment, but when I see someone who types solely with their index fingers, I like to swap the M and N keys. I actually had a guy who was ready to destroy his keyboard because he kept typing whatever website ending in .con. Typically doesn't work with anyone who can type properly.
 
This happened to my Dad in the 60s. While sitting in a classroom waiting for a final exam to start, a man in a suit and tie came in, sat in an empty seat, took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves, and neatly laid out a couple of sharpened pencils.

When the exams were handed out, the mystery guy opened the envelope, looked at the exam for a couple seconds and shouted "He did it AGAIN!" and grabbed his stuff and stormed out.
 
Three guys walk into a bar acting a bit tipsily, the three belly up to the bar and order a round or two. The middle guy comments about not feeling so well.... then he fall on to the bar arms around his head and making motions and sounds that resemble vomiting.

His arms are concealing the baggy of Dinty Moore Beef Stew concealed in a shirt pocket or on a string around his neck that he has now deposited on the bar. Now the other two argue over the meat and eat it.
 
Look up "Trigger Happy TV" on YouTube. It's full of great gags like this. One of my favorites is the host dressed in an old time dog catcher uniform with the pant legs shredded, running and shouting "Shih Tzus!!! Shih Tzus!!!!"
 
Clean out a windex bottle and fill with blue gatorade, drink in front of coworkers
 
Years ago I emptied my roommates deodorant from its container, refilled with Crisco. Hilarity ensued...
 
- Wash out a mayo jar extremely well. Fill with vanilla pudding. Eat with a spoon at the office (SWMBO is another valid target/victim).

I like this one A LOT!

I've done this with chocolate pudding, and a clean baby diaper.

Also, when we have parties, I take a paper sized piece of cardboard and use it to fill up our medicine cabinets with ping pong balls. Open the cabinet, place the cardboard against the inside of the cabinet to hold the balls in place, pour in the ping pong balls, close the cabinet and slowly remove the cardboard paper. If anybody gets "snoopy" about the drugs you take....... chaos ensues.

Covering the inside of the toilet with saran wrap is also fun. Lift seat, cover with saran wrap, put seat back down.
 
Years ago, there was an email prank going around. It was an audio file that was supposedly a voice mail message from Lindsey Lohan or whoever the floozy of the day was. Your message to the patsy was something like "This is hilarious, but the audio quality is crap."

The patsy plays the audio file and it sounds like a girl's voice mail message about something that's happening at a party. But the audio is crap, so the patsy turns the volume up. It keeps getting quieter and quieter so the patsy turns the volume up and up some more.

After about a minute, the volume has been turned up all the way.

Then a big booming male voice comes on at full blast and shouts "I LOVE G@Y P*RN! I'M WATCHING G@Y P*RN RIGHT NOW!!!!"
 
Also, you would be surprised just how upset people get if you join them in their quadrant of a revolving door. I wouldnt suggest it.
 
Take some electrical tape or transparent tape and tape down the trigger on the sprayer on your kitchen sink. Aim the sprayer toward where the next person who uses the sink will be standing when they turn on the water.

When I was younger, I had my old man standing at the sink for a good 5 seconds getting drenched when he finally shut the faucet off!:ban:

I did this to my wife on April fools day a few years back. I thought it was hilarious. This was right after I stopped on a busy road got out, so she could hear the traffic, then called her saying i got pulled over. Then said I forgot to pay my insurance so the cops took my brand new car.

I thought that was hilarious as well.
 
I did this to my wife on April fools day a few years back. I thought it was hilarious. This was right after I stopped on a busy road got out, so she could hear the traffic, then called her saying i got pulled over. Then said I forgot to pay my insurance so the cops took my brand new car.

I thought that was hilarious as well.

Are you still married to the same girl?;)
 
Read "The Joy of Work- at the Expense of Your Co-workers" by Scott Adams. I have pulled many of his stunts that still have bosses pissed at me 10 years after....
 
If you work at a place that people tend to keep their cars unlocked, turn on all their blinkers, headlights (if it won't kill the batter), wipers, back wiper, etc. Not overly funny, but still entertaining. Also, for a car-savy type coworker, a zip-tie around the driveshaft will drive them nuts. Kyle
 
Take some electrical tape or transparent tape and tape down the trigger on the sprayer on your kitchen sink. Aim the sprayer toward where the next person who uses the sink will be standing when they turn on the water.

When I was younger, I had my old man standing at the sink for a good 5 seconds getting drenched when he finally shut the faucet off!:ban:

Ha, as an electrical apprentice, wiring houses, we did this all the time. Seemed is was always the Realtor that got it!
 
Super glue a quarter to the floor at the mall, or in a school hallway; then stand back & watch the frustration of those who try to pick it up.

When going through the supermarket checkstand, the cashier will usually say "how are you?' or "how's it going?" Tell them. They don't know what to do when you say something like "$hitty, how're you?" or you can just lie & say something like "I'm dying of cancer" or "I just found out I have herpes."

Ask the waitress if the polish sausage (or ham) is kosher.

When shopping, put things into other people's cart when they're not looking, then watch their confusion at the checkstand...
slipping a box of condoms into a nun's cart, you get the idea.

When going thru the line at a cafeteria, ask the server for 1 lima bean.

Regards, GF.
 
If you work at a place that people tend to keep their cars unlocked, turn on all their blinkers, headlights (if it won't kill the batter), wipers, back wiper, etc. Not overly funny, but still entertaining. Also, for a car-savy type coworker, a zip-tie around the driveshaft will drive them nuts. Kyle

Zip Tie is a great idea! I'm going to tie one onto the drive shaft of my wife's car. Then I'll pull it into the garage and drink beer for a while as I "Work" on the problem. Maybe play some tunes and fiddle with some brewing equipment.

Of course I'll throw a few tools on the ground near the car, and have a handy website ready with expensive parts showing in case she comes out to see how things are going.

1) Spend quality time with Beer, Music, and Brewing stuff.
2) Look like a hero who saved us a LOT of money.
3) ?
4) Profit

:cross:
 
Clean out a windex bottle and fill with blue gatorade, drink in front of coworkers


Yeah but when you don't clean the windows with it then what?

Mine would insist I at least give it a try or at very least wonder why I am cleaning the windows.
 
This is a little out of bounds, but take off someone's gas cap and place it on the ground. Take a 3/4 empty 5 lb sugar bag. Put some sugar around the filler neck, and pour a little pile on the ground below the filler. Leave the 3/4 empty bag nearby.
 
Simple but effective: Place a sticky note under the laser or ball of a mouse.

I did this as an April Fool's joke once to a co-worker. She ended up not figuring it out and call the IT dept. After, a mass company email went out to stop "tampering with company equipment," because it's against policy. Never got caught but killed gags for me. Not worth it on these morons ...
 
If you work at a place that people tend to keep their cars unlocked, turn on all their blinkers, headlights (if it won't kill the batter), wipers, back wiper, etc. Not overly funny, but still entertaining. Also, for a car-savy type coworker, a zip-tie around the driveshaft will drive them nuts. Kyle

We used to do this to each other with the ambulances. There was a battery kill switch to keep the electronics from draining the battery - hit that, turn on EVERY. SINGLE. electronic device in the cabin, lights, and siren set to hyper-yelp.

One of my going away gifts was setting up every ambulance that was parked outside during our annual Christmas dinner. It went over much better than the time I filled 1,000 styrofoam cups with water on every horizontal surface in the station.

Don't try to out-prank a paramedic.. Some of these back and forths went on for months at a time :D
 
At my old job the very distinguished British VP on his 30th birthday came in to find his office decorated with a pink princess theme. He was a good sport about it, even wore the sash whenever he wasnt client facing for the day, but opted against wearing the tiara or carrying the septer.
 
One day at work, (construction) one of the guys was giving me sh*t about something, so I told him, "one of these days I'm gonna piss in your water cooler". Couple days later I put a few drops of yellow food color and a small handful of salt in his cooler. Lunchtime came and he took a drink, said "What the...." Took the lid off his cooler and looked inside. The look on his face was priceless! I had to show him the food color bottle to convince him I didn't actually pee in his water.
 
Other times at work, guys would carry their tools around in 5 gallon buckets. I'd empty the bucket and cut the bottom out, then replace the tools. Either that or if it was a wood floor, I'd just screw the bucket down. Never a dull moment!
 
One day at work, (construction) one of the guys was giving me sh*t about something, so I told him, "one of these days I'm gonna piss in your water cooler". Couple days later I put a few drops of yellow food color and a small handful of salt in his cooler. Lunchtime came and he took a drink, said "What the...." Took the lid off his cooler and looked inside. The look on his face was priceless! I had to show him the food color bottle to convince him I didn't actually pee in his water.


:lol: that's great!
 
Here's something both useful to the user of this stunt and annoying to everyone else. Work at a big company housed inside of a large multi-floor office building? Ever go on a company trip in a resort town and be stuck in a big hotel with over a thousand rooms and what seems like two elevators?

Wish you could just go straight to your floor and bypass all of the other floors whether or not they have guests waiting on the elevators or not?

Simple trick that ALL elevators have programmed into them:

When you first get on the elevator, hold the door closed button down until the doors close. Then, press your floor while continuing to hold down the door closed button. Then release the door closed button once the elevator starts to move.

This is an "express floor" function built into elevators which allows staff, police and fire/rescue to immediately go to a specific floor without having to stop at every floor with someone waiting to use an elevator.

Yes, it is programmed into ALL elevators. You'll thank me later. :)
 
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