Best TV quote ever!!

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dirtymike1

dirtymike1

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So I got home from work a little while ago, turn on the TV and its on cartoon network. The kids show Camp Lazo is on and the first thing I hear is this

"Well he said if he were an eagle, that he wouldn't even waste his stomach acid on me."!!!!!!

Good God!! TV is so much differnet then from when I was a kid. And I'm only 22!!!!
 
I think Homer will OWN this thread!

"30% of the human body is made up of water.... or in my case beer"

"Drink Up! Not drinking is only going to make it worse!"

"Sure Lisa.. some MAGICAL animal"
 
Gotta Chime in here for my boy ... Ralph Wiggum

-"Go banana!"
-"My cat's breath smells like cat food"
-"The doctor said I wouldn't get so many nose bleeds if I just kept my finger out of there"
-"Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"
-"Me fail English? That's unpossible."
-"And, when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life."
 
srm775 said:
Gotta Chime in here for my boy ... Ralph Wiggum

-"Go banana!"
-"My cat's breath smells like cat food"
-"The doctor said I wouldn't get so many nose bleeds if I just kept my finger out of there"
-"Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"
-"Me fail English? That's unpossible."
-"And, when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life."
Click to expand...

-"Sleep - that's where I'm a viking!"
-"When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University."
-"Tastes like burning."
-"I look like cable TV!"
-"When I grow up, I want to be a principal or a caterpillar."
 
"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."

-Groucho Marx
 
Professor Frink said:
-"Sleep - that's where I'm a viking!"
-"When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University."
-"Tastes like burning."
-"I look like cable TV!"
-"When I grow up, I want to be a principal or a caterpillar."
Click to expand...

The principal or caterpillar one was pretty good to ...
 
I love that Ralph unpossable quote.

Homer:

'First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women...'
 
SAM: What's new, Normie? NORM: Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer. -- Cheers
SAM: What'd you like, Normie? NORM: A reason to live. Give me another beer. -- Cheers
SAM: What'll you have Normie? NORM: Well, I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap. SAM: Looks like beer, Norm. NORM: Call me Mister Lucky. -- Cheers
WOODY: What's the story, Mr. Peterson? NORM: The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending. -- Cheers
WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you. NORM: I know. If she calls, I'm not here. -- Cheers
WOODY: How's it going, Mr. Peterson? NORM: Poor. WOODY: I'm sorry to hear that. NORM: No, I mean pour. -- Cheers
WOODY: Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson? NORM: All right, but stop me at one. Make that one-thirty. -- Cheers
WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson? NORM: The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody. -- Cheers
WOODY: How would a beer feel, Mr. Peterson? NORM: Pretty nervous if I was in the room. -- Cheers
WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, what's up? NORM: The warranty on my liver. -- Cheers
SAM: What do you say, Norm? NORM: Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer. -- Cheers
COACH: What would you say to a beer, Normie? NORM: Daddy wuvs you. -- Cheers
SAM: What do you know there, Norm? NORM: How to sit. How to drink. Want to quiz me? -- Cheers
COACH: Can I draw you a beer, Norm? NORM: No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one. -- Cheers
CLIFF: Hey, Norm, What's up? NORM: My blood-alcohol level. -- Cheers
 
Carl from ATHF

Okay, I'm sorry, Candy. I guess we're not in America. I guess now, I'm not allowed to pay for sex with pennies.
 
niquejim said:
SAM: What's new, Normie? NORM: Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer. -- Cheers
SAM: What'd you like, Normie? NORM: A reason to live. Give me another beer. -- Cheers
SAM: What'll you have Normie? NORM: Well, I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap. SAM: Looks like beer, Norm. NORM: Call me Mister Lucky. -- Cheers
WOODY: What's the story, Mr. Peterson? NORM: The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending. -- Cheers
WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you. NORM: I know. If she calls, I'm not here. -- Cheers
WOODY: How's it going, Mr. Peterson? NORM: Poor. WOODY: I'm sorry to hear that. NORM: No, I mean pour. -- Cheers
WOODY: Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson? NORM: All right, but stop me at one. Make that one-thirty. -- Cheers
WOODY: What's going on, Mr. Peterson? NORM: The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson? A beer please, Woody. -- Cheers
WOODY: How would a beer feel, Mr. Peterson? NORM: Pretty nervous if I was in the room. -- Cheers
WOODY: Hey, Mr. Peterson, what's up? NORM: The warranty on my liver. -- Cheers
SAM: What do you say, Norm? NORM: Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer. -- Cheers
COACH: What would you say to a beer, Normie? NORM: Daddy wuvs you. -- Cheers
SAM: What do you know there, Norm? NORM: How to sit. How to drink. Want to quiz me? -- Cheers
COACH: Can I draw you a beer, Norm? NORM: No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one. -- Cheers
CLIFF: Hey, Norm, What's up? NORM: My blood-alcohol level. -- Cheers
Click to expand...

My all time favourite Normism is this:

Woody: What are you up to Mr Peterson? Norm: My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall"
 
Another Cheers one,
"Whats shaking Mr. Peterson?" Norm "All 4 cheeks and a couple of chins"

Ralph Wiggum "Were gonna be in a pie"



SD
 
South Park

"Too bad drinking scotch isn't a paying job or Kenny's dad would be a millionare!" -- Cartman

-----

"Mom -- kitty is being a dildo." -- Cartman
"I know a special little kitty that's sleeping with mommy tonight." -- Cartman's mom replies

------

Iraqi Interrogator: "What does America want with Iraq? Tell me my main man!"

Santa Claus: "I don't know, I live in the north pole."

(Interrogator pulls out two metal rods)

Santa Claus: "What are you going to do to me?"

Interrogator: "They say it was the Chinese who first experimented with electro-shock to the testicles..."

Santa Claus: "Oh no! Not Santa's balls!"

(Zap)

Santa Claus: "Aargh! I'm gonna f*cking kill you!"
 

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