The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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Why are you ******** about going *water skiing* with the coach? If you don't happen to be sitting in an office with a window, it's ****ing snowing outside.



Need a bigger hill than those pussies have, though. Paulie, let's drag it up Greylock, I'll let you have the first run down the Thunderbolt.
 
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If it weren't for the fact that within ten seconds of meeting him Al would be irritated at me for inviting Rookie along, I would go with Cape's idea of chaining Rookie to the couch and weighing it down with lead. But then it would probably take her about as long as it has taken all of us to agree that actually carrying through with that idea is a service to humanity and so I'd need to spend another 15 minutes in his company. I know. I know. I'm sorry but she just wouldn't go along with drowning him without having experienced what an annoying *****enozzle he is. And I just don't want to have to spend the 15 minutes it would take to convince her.

So while it was a really good idea, we're going to have to shelve it.
 
you forget, I have met al, 3 times, and by the 2nd time she was probably wanting to add me to the pile of dead hookers under the shed
 
that ok, i will just hold onto the anchor very tight, you said I cant come aboard, but nothing about me holdingonto something hanging from the front
 
ComcastWineRookie said:
that ok, i will just hold onto the anchor very tight, you said I cant come aboard, but nothing about me holdingonto something hanging from the front
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I think that's a MAHVAHLOUS idea. You hang onto the anchor till we get well offshore. Then I'll just reach my hand down and throw a little switch and problem solved.
 
paulthenurse said:
I think that's a MAHVAHLOUS idea. You hang onto the anchor till we get well offshore. Then I'll just reach my hand down and throw a little switch and problem solved.
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maybe I should call the FBI and let them know there is a terrorist hiding in a boat called Lobster Saw Us, they will find the boat and as we saw earlier this year, they shoot first and then ask questions.
 
That's because you're the King of the *****ebags! Lord and Ruler Of Massengillia!



Don't even bother trying to change.
 
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Not that anybody cares, but I'm going to meet my son's future inlaws..Yay!!! I can't wait!! My wife seems to be excited for some reason. I need a drink..

Meet the Focker's here I come..
 
Bulls Beers said:
Not that anybody cares, but I'm going to meet my son's future inlaws..Yay!!! I can't wait!! My wife seems to be excited for some reason. I need a drink.. Meet the Focker's here I come..
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Holy crap! You have a kid old enough to be getting married!? What did you do, have him in Jr High School?
 
Ha, thanks man. He's actually my stepson, but I've raised him since he was 5. He's 25 now. If I had him, I would've been 20. His fiance is great. She's a nurse at the Brigham and cute as a button. Is that weird to say? Probably.

My youngest is 8.
 
ComcastWineRookie said:
why do I always regress back to that level of ultimate *****bagery from time to time, that really was uncalled for. Im sorry
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I'm going back to ignoring you. I don't care about your deeply rooted angst. Please do me the courtesy of not responding to posts of mine. You should assume they are not intended for you.5
 
It's weird when your kids get older. My girls friends, kids I've know since they crawled, are hotties now. I took the girls and a bunch of their friends out on the boat and I couldn't look anywhere except straight ahead.

Good luck with the Fockers. Maybe they'll be cool. Probably not, your kid is getting jiggy with their daughter. I'd expect a cool reception. Although they're engaged, that gives him some legitimacy in their eyes.
 
Bulls Beers said:
Ha, thanks man. He's actually my stepson, but I've raised him since he was 5. He's 25 now. If I had him, I would've been 20. His fiance is great. She's a nurse at the Brigham and cute as a button. Is that weird to say? Probably.

My youngest is 8.
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And your beautiful wife was what, barely out of diapers?

Congrats!
 
paulthenurse said:
It's weird when your kids get older. My girls friends, kids I've know since they crawled, are hotties now. I took the girls and a bunch of their friends out on the boat and I couldn't look anywhere except straight ahead.
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... "And the award for 'The Single Skeeviest Thing Ever Said On Homebrewtalk, And That's Saying A Lot" goes to.... PaulTheNurse!

C'mon down, Paul, and congratulations! Now, let's cut off those testicles of yours before you do something you regret!"
 
the_bird said:
... "And the award for 'The Single Skeeviest Thing Ever Said On Homebrewtalk, And That's Saying A Lot" goes to.... PaulTheNurse!

C'mon down, Paul, and congratulations! Now, let's cut off those testicles of yours before you do something you regret!"
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I thought he lost those years ago....
 
What did I say that was icky?

I took my girls and their friends out on the boat. I didn't expect the kids I used to coach in junior high girls softball to show up wearing the bathing suits they were all wearing. It would be creepy if I was looking. What I said was I didn't need/want to be seeing that so I kept my eyes looking the other way. How is that creepy?
 
paulthenurse said:
What did I say that was icky?

I took my girls and their friends out on the boat. I didn't expect the kids I used to coach in junior high girls softball to show up wearing the bathing suits they were all wearing. It would be creepy if I was looking. What I said was I didn't need/want to be seeing that so I kept my eyes looking the other way. How is that creepy?
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you a bigger man than I am, if it was me I would have stared all day and thought dirty dirty things
 
I'm a little late to the couch surfing party, but why don't you start with an inflatable couch? Must be wicked comfortable - just look how happy they are.

couch.jpg
 
Yakima 300

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