The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

Ah, back to the senseless banter, how reassuring in these uncertain times..

Quick back of the envelope says that we can put a 450 pound man into a 55 gallon drum. Now to see a man about a blender.

Ya,Paulie would never fit.

You'd be surprised at what I've seen people fit in an overhead bin.

55 gallon drum is no problem. Gotta remove legs first though.

Paulie has no legs ... to speak of.

my my, this thread seems to have taken a dark turn.

Maybe just the holidays... anyway, hope you all are coping to some degree...

I'm drinkin.Merry Christmas.

Paulie doens't have legs, he has hams.

And he has the beginnings of a blacksmithing forge. Spent yesterday learning how to weld with my pal Arty. Put together this firebox out of 3/8” plate. The ash dump and bellows pipe is 3” and the forge tabletop is a piece of 36” x 36” x 1/4” plate. I’ll make legs out of 1” square tube next time I have a free day off. So probably in May.

I can't see the images but pounding on red hot iron or steel sounds like a burly man's way to manage stress.

Aww god, he's at it again ... ... oh, and whats the brake rotor for?

You know you can go down to the local pipe shop and buy a nice glass one?

Paulie's finally realized it's better to cremate the dead prostitutes rather than bury them under the shed. Smaller chance of matching their dental records.

EDIT: What am I saying? Paulie's hookers don't have any teeth...

Brake rotor was Plan A. Did some more reading and learned about fire temp as related to depth of the fuel and where the oxidation occurs. Turns out you need a deeper fire so you are not oxidizing the object you’re making. Rotors won’t do that.

And those few hooker teeth are a tough burn.

What are you going to make with forge?

Them teeth jokes aren't so funny, remember the guy who chipped his wife in Connecticut a couple of decades ago? they caught him because of the teeth in the chipper he rented, same model as mine, 50HP diesel Brush Bandit 90. Working girls, and even wives, are people too. BTW, they say a body wont chip well if not frozen first. And no links to the Fargo scene, those chippers are ridiculous, only make noise, no chips.

I've got so much metal in my yard, I sure don't need to make more, just filled a big roll off dumpster w scrap metal, and we could barely get the door shut. Probably could do that a couple more times, but might start chucking things I'd regret later by the end of the second dumpster, but how many take out diesels and truck rears does one need?

Let me guess... you need to create a forge sooooo.... you can forge the pieces you need to finish the pizza oven???

Neighbors wanted louder hammering.

Yeah, only so many times one can hit ones head on the door, this will be more sustainable.

Take a chill pill there Debbie Downer. No hookers were harmed in this thread, despite what my ‘friends’ claim. All references re: disposing of departed Hos go back to a years old discussion of the relative merits and/or demerits of high potency yiesties.

Good one dude..

Cape Brewing said:

Let me guess... you need to create a forge sooooo.... you can forge the pieces you need to finish the pizza oven???

Click to expand...

Winnah'

smurfjuice said:

Winnah'

Click to expand...

Losah

Forging sweet battle axes for your comic con and renaissance fairs?

There was a Scottish guy who lives around here made it pretty big making big swords for that sort of thing, had a tv show and stuff for a while, sells the swords made to order for big bucks.

Merry Christmas flatlanders!

Merry Christmas to all and to all a full pint.

Yous as well Sire

Indeed! or two...

Dland said:

What are you going to make with forge?

Click to expand...

There is a pond down in Barnstable (Hathaway’s Pond) where just about everyone in eastern Mass does their initial open water check out dives. There are a couple of platforms in 20 odd feet of water, built up off the bottom so as not to screw up the visibility as students practice their skills. There are a few statues, an old stolen Volvo and a 30’ cabin cruiser all scattered around at various depths throughout the pond, put there over the years by various dive shops, fire departments, etc.

A dear friend of mine, Don Ferris, has been instrumental in that scene for years. I’d like to make a King Neptune statue, maybe 10’ tall, to place down there next to the cabin cruiser in honor of him. Something akin to the King Neptune sculpture in Curaçao.

Merry Christmas, I hope Santa was good to you.

If I was going to build a statue out of steel, I'd probably make it out of existing metal parts from scrap piles, assembled with 6011 drag weld & buzz box, but then again, I'm either too busy and/or unmotivated to make "art" of any kind anymore.

I did my first open water dive off E Chop, nice collection of discarded beverage containers, dead eel grass and spider crabs, for as far as the eye can see, haven't dived since my boat sank in '05.

Today I start to reassemble gutted interior of my off island truck; '97 Dodge w Cummins & NV4500. Mice got in there real bad, had to replace heater core, AC evap, carpet, etc. But that is not art...oh well.

If I had a pile of scrap steel that's just what I'd do. Alas.

Cape Brewing said:

Let me guess... you need to create a forge sooooo.... you can forge the pieces you need to finish the pizza oven???

Click to expand...

Nope. Flag pole.

Just dropped off a script for one single 1mg Ativan tab for my visit to the dentist this afternoon. The pharmacist looked st me like I’m crazy. I don’t do dentists well.

He probably was wondering why you need to get tranqed to visit a dentist

Wuss

I liked it in the old days when they would hook you up to nitrous oxide for fillings.

Ah nitrous, I had a couple root canals with just that for discomfort management.

So this crazy lady took sharp steel rods and jammed them down between my teeth and gums to see if she could get them to come out the soles of my feet. Then she took a bastard file and got to work on the surface of my teeth.

Biatch, you’d better slow your roll.