Your better half's biggest foible

Cleaning the house today and something struck me: I spend as much time picking up my kids' crap and putting it back where it belongs as I do my wife's crap.

The irony is my wife is always complaining about the clutter despite the fact that much of it is hers. I find her music stuff all over the place. Shoes in every room. Nearly every day I hear, "Where are my car keys and purse?" That, of course, means they're not where they belong.

This is not meant as a ***** thread. I just want to know what's the thing that drives you nuts about your spouse/better half that you just overlook in the interest of harmony, that one thing that gnaws but isn't worth arguing over.

I love my wife dearly. She's an amazing woman. But for God's sake, woman, put stuff back.

i'm with you.

when we moved into this house from an apartment, I thought, yes, now my living room will be clear of kids' crap. Their bedrooms are huge. One of their bedrooms is bigger than our apt living room, by a good margin.

Guess what? our living room is still full of crap. baby toys freakin' everywhere. WTF?!

That's Bob's biggest foible, too. He NEVER puts things back where he got them. He's always looking for a hammer, wrench, pliers, etc, so I have my own. I always put everything back where it goes. I can tell you right now where anything I own is. He can't even find his glasses in the morning because he never puts them on the nightstand two days in a row. I know that's just how he is, so I don't let it annoy me too much.

The thing that drives me crazy is that he can't find his 7/8" deep socket, so he'll come and borrow MINE. I say, "Fine, but bring it back". Yeah, right! So now I can't find MY socket. ARGGGGHHHHH!

The worst part is, I'm trying desperately to get the girls to put stuff away after they use it. However, when mommy has three library books on the coffee table, four more on the dining room table and five on the kitchen counter, I come off as hypocritical.

OMG that is the life I'm living too.

We have an extra bed room, it's knee deep in unwashed clothes and junk. There is a rocking chair and a computer in there somewhere.

She can't find anything. I asked her to get a pair of gloves and told her exactly where they were, she yells "there are some rubber gloves in here..." Later I found the gloves I wanted ON TOP of the rubber gloves. I mean, they were right there.

She lost her keys, borrowed mine, LOST mine, and had to use the valet key for a few days until the others showed up. One time she lost her keys and asked me to help find them. They were in her purse, the first place I looked.

Half finished projects get abandoned. She still hasn't got the curtains back up from Halloween. I'm sure the neighbors are getting tired of looking at my junk.

On the other hand, she's a great mom and can cook the dickens out of anything.

Largest problem w/ Mrs. Jass:

She's constantly obsessing about putting things away. Always tidying up around the place. Picking up after the the kids and me. Leave some crap lying around fer cryin out loud. It makes the place look lived in.:rockin:

OP hit the nail on the head my SWMBO is a stay at home mom who baby sites 1-3 other rug rats. now I understand toys out of place, but mail, paperwork, and just stuff not put up when its done really bugs me I just deal with it because well she lets me work on my hobbies which cost much more than she spends on her self.

car keys, cell phone are alway gone a missing.

I love SWMBO but wish she would pick up after HER self. I work mon-friday 7-4 and friday and sat 4:30-10 to support us financially I wish the house work could just stay in order.

Hugh Jass my SWMBO is complete opposite, laundy alway half done and scattered all over the place, kitchen tabled used for any but eating at, etc etc.

-=Jason=-

Hugh_Jass said:

Largest problem w/ Mrs. Jass:

She's constantly obsessing about putting things away. Always tidying up around the place. Picking up after the the kids and me. Leave some crap lying around fer cryin out loud. It makes the place look lived in.:rockin:

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I like her even more now.

My wife obsesses about putting laundry away. It absolutely cannot sit in a basket for more than 10 minutes. Me, I travel a good deal so I'm used to living out of a suitcase at times. No different picking clothes out of a laundry basket.

Sorta runs counter to her inability to put anything else away.

Yooper said:

The thing that drives me crazy is that he can't find his 7/8" deep socket, so he'll come and borrow MINE. I say, "Fine, but bring it back". Yeah, right! So now I can't find MY socket. ARGGGGHHHHH!

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His and hers socket sets make the perfect wedding gift.

My wife is always griping at me for leaving things lying around. Her nick name for me (when the boy is around) is H.A. (Half Asser). My biggest grip about her....her thinking things have to be done and put away right now because she wants them done. Despite them laying around for several days, it all of a sudden has to be done IMMEDIATELY. She is always asking me to do sometihng with my folded clothes instead of leaving them in the basket downstairs. I prefer to just pick them out of the basket. PLUS, I DON'T HAVE ANYWHERE TO PUT THEM UPSTAIRS seeing as how she took over the entire closet, the dresser stuffed in the closet, her mammoth dresser and let me with 1 4 drawer dresser.

My wife is also afflicted with the dish syndrome. she never seems to put anything back in the same place twice. And then nags at me for fixing it or nags at me cause she can't find the thing.

She also has a bad habit of leaving EVERYTHING out. She makes a sandwich and leave everything out. If I attempt to start putting it back before she has left the room she nags "I'LL DO THAT" and yet, if I don't, it will all be ther the next morning.

She uses the sink as a trash can.

And finally, she never hangs the towels to dry but then complains when they start to smell musty.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't is my scenario.


My wifes biggest complaint about me is that she married me.

shecky said:

I like her even more now.

My wife obsesses about putting laundry away. It absolutely cannot sit in a basket for more than 10 minutes. Me, I travel a good deal so I'm used to living out of a suitcase at times. No different picking clothes out of a laundry basket.

Sorta runs counter to her inability to put anything else away.

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There are just two of us living here now (empty nesters ) so it's not as bad, BUT....... Bob must have at least three jackets on dining room chairs, and about 4 pairs of shoes in the mudroom. We have a big closet in the mudroom, a bench, and a nice coatrack. He can't put his stuff away, as he says he wants "easy access". It was terrible when the kids still were at home! I kept explaining, "If all four of us did that, we'd have 16 pairs of shoes in front of the door, and 12 coats in the dining room!" He agreed and "let me" put his stuff away because he didn't want other people's stuff all over! But it's a losing battle.

And, one last thing! If he does manage to put coat or shoes into the closet, he is incapable of closing the closet doors. They slide open and closed, but apparently he doesn't get the "slide closed" part.

SWMBO's kids, especially her son, are notorious for not being able to put things where they belong, or find them because they didn't put them where they belong.
I can't count the times that my step-son has asked, "Where are my..." keys, wallet, iPod, shoes, guitar tuner, picks, computer... HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU MISPLACE A @$#%ING LAPTOP?????
It's gotten to the point that when he starts asking, I ignore him. He and SWMBO got mad at me, once, because I wouldn't help him find his car keys AND shoes, so he could get to school and was going to be late. I explained to them that IF he had A) put his car keys on the hook right next to the door, B) put his shoes on the matt directly under the keyhook, right next to the door, and C) had gotten his a$$ out of bed when his mother woke him up (17 years old, and still needs his mother to wake him up to go to school???), then there would be no danger of him being late to school.
The other thing both of her kids do is leave their shoes right in the middle of the kitchem floor, instead of putting them on the matt five feet away. SWMBO can't understand why this bothers me, and I explained that when my kids come over, they manage to put them where they belong, so why can't hers? (Of course, it helps that when my son refused to put his shoes there, after being asked THREE times, I threw them out the window onto the driveway, and it started raining 15 minutes later...while they were still out there. He learned his lesson.

I've tried to explain to all of them that being in the trades, I've learned to ALWAYS put my things where they belong, because my tools are my livelyhood, and not knowing where they are can cost me a job. Hasn't sunk in...yet.

Twist it around now. What's the one thing about you that drives your better half nuts?

I'm not sure on this but it's probably two things. One, I forget stuff. Not big stuff or distant stuff, but stuff she's just asked me to do. For instance, she will ask me to take out the trash while I'm in the middle of some menial task and it will, without fail, slip my mind.

Two, unless it's something tragic, I can't get worked up or worry about anything. I'm incapable of it. She does not like that at all.

Something that bugs my wife about me? HBT Well, my frequency on HBT

shecky said:

Twist it around now. What's the one thing about you that drives your better half nuts?

I'm not sure on this but it's probably two things. One, I forget stuff. Not big stuff or distant stuff, but stuff she's just asked me to do. For instance, she will ask me to take out the trash while I'm in the middle of some menial task and it will, without fail, slip my mind.

Two, unless it's something tragic, I can't get worked up or worry about anything. I'm incapable of it. She does not like that at all.

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Same here...but I always have the excuse of getting old, AND growing up in the 70's.

shecky said:

Two, unless it's something tragic, I can't get worked up or worry about anything. I'm incapable of it. She does not like that at all.

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Nor your ambivalence towards bacon....

Oh shoot - I just realized I left some beer bottles on the counter from last night. Meh, they'll be there when I get home, and there won't be anyone to ***** at me about it

I've been unemployed for a year and do most of the housework, cleaning, cooking and shopping now, and I see and deal with all of the grievances stated above and more or less take it in stride.
For me it's turning off the lights, or lack there of. SWMBO even does the bill paying around here and complains about the cost of electricity. Yet, she doesn't seem to grasp the concept of power conservation. She seems to think that light switches only work one way. I go through the house turning off lights only to find all the lights back on only minutes later. Of course, she denied this, so I made a list of all the lights in the house, and for one week and checked off every time I shut off a light that wasn't being used. In the end she conceded that perhaps I had a point. That lasted maybe two days. Now, she gets mad at me for turning off lights!

shecky said:

I like her even more now.

My wife obsesses about putting laundry away. It absolutely cannot sit in a basket for more than 10 minutes. Me, I travel a good deal so I'm used to living out of a suitcase at times. No different picking clothes out of a laundry basket.

Sorta runs counter to her inability to put anything else away.

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Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the pride she takes in keeping a well maintained household. We complement each other very well in our relationship.

It drives Mrs. Jass nuts that I do not mind sitting in a dark room. I think it goes along with her obsession of tidyness. She's very aware of her environmental surroundings, lighting included. When our children were born, she requested I bring her a table lamp for her hospital room. She didn't like the light level in the room and wanted it fixed.

I drive my wife nuts because I never turn off lights, the whole house is lit up if I am wandering in the house. she on the other hand is obsessive about turning off lights, to the point that she turns off the light on her way out of a room even if I am still in there doing something. The other day I worked late and was at the table eating dinner, she walked through and turned off the light, so I was in the dark trying to find my food.

Mine wants sex way to often, besides that she's perfect.

I had to go ask Bob what was his "thing" about me because I had a hard time narrowing down to one!

He told me that he makes him insane that I am incapable of drinking an entire cup of coffee, but yet I drink coffee all morning when I'm home. So, there are usually 2 or 3 cups of coffee, 1/2 gone and cold, that he sees a day. He explained that it's part of the "morning ritual" of mine that he hates. I'm NOT a morning person, and I must have coffee, stay in my robe, and do email before I'm the least bit able to move and/or talk. He's a high energy morning person, and it makes him crazy that I won't even take a walk before 8:00 am on a beautiful summer day.

I'm glad he only mentioned those- I was afraid I'd get him started on a roll!

My gripe with SWMBO: she's been out of the workforce for so long, she doesn't realize what a 9-5 job can do to you mentally and physically. 2-3 household chores in the 3 waking hours that I'm home each night is the limit, and that includes taking over kid caring duty and making dinner 2 or 3 nights a week...

Her gripe with me: I never recognize how much work it is to care for 2 kids who constantly destroy the house (ages 7 and 5) and clean up after the third, 39 year old kid (me). (although, since she doesn't read this message board, twice a year I take a week off work and stay home with the kids so she can go on a "sabbatical" vacation with her friends. All of the household chores get done, the house gets cleaner, I brew several batches of beer, and I finish up some of those nagging home improvement jobs I've always been meaning to do)

All in all, we're perfect for each other, we're both completely insane.

wildwest450 said:

Mine wants sex way to often, besides that she's perfect.

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I see your complaint here. It would be nice if she included you every now and then.

shecky said:

I see your complaint here. It would be nice if she included you every now and then.

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Ha, I see what you did there.

Hey, as long as she takes pics....

Mischief_Brewing said:

My gripe with SWMBO: she's been out of the workforce for so long, she doesn't realize what a 9-5 job can do to you mentally and physically. 2-3 household chores in the 3 waking hours that I'm home each night is the limit, and that includes taking over kid caring duty and making dinner 2 or 3 nights a week...

Her gripe with me: I never recognize how much work it is to care for 2 kids who constantly destroy the house (ages 7 and 5) and clean up after the third, 39 year old kid (me). (although, since she doesn't read this message board, twice a year I take a week off work and stay home with the kids so she can go on a "sabbatical" vacation with her friends. All of the household chores get done, the house gets cleaner, I brew several batches of beer, and I finish up some of those nagging home improvement jobs I've always been meaning to do)

All in all, we're perfect for each other, we're both completely insane.

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i love my kids, i love spending time with them.....but I'd rather have a job than be a stay at home dad. It is a ton of work watching 2 kids. and mine at only 3 and 1.

but....i have a pretty laid-back job....

motobrewer said:

i love my kids, i love spending time with them.....but I'd rather have a job than be a stay at home dad. It is a ton of work watching 2 kids. and mine at only 3 and 1.

but....i have a pretty laid-back job....

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I hear ya. it does get easier, just not easy. I wish I could say that my job is laid-back...Crap, I'm late to a meeting...

wildwest450 said:

Mine wants sex way to often, besides that she's perfect.

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Divorce her immediately. Cite irreconcilable differences.







And give her my address.

My wife being so hypocritical drives me nuts. She will get so pissed off when I do something but proceeds to do the same damn thing and god forbid I say anything to her about.



And for me, I think it would be my memory. She is constantly getting mad it me because I forgot to do something or forget that she told me something.

dataz722 said:

And for me, I think it would be my memory. She is constantly getting mad it me because I forgot to do something or forget that she told me something.

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Probably more to do with hearing.

wildwest450 said:

Probably more to do with hearing.

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No, I usually remember when I ignore her.

Oh man, I love her for it, but my wife has some wonderful ADHD. So on the weekends or what not, when we are both working on chores around the house, she has a method to keep herself on task: she keeps asking me to do each random thing that comes up. I'll be outside mowing the lawn, and come in for a drink of water. She'll be working on cleaning the living room or something, and when she sees me pass by she'll ask me to do whatever it is she just thought of or noticed that isn't what she is currently working on. It frustrates me to no end, I just want to focus on one thing at a time!

Also, anytime she mentions something that I am not familiar with (someones birthday, a school event, etc.) it's because I forgot. Not because she might not have told me about it. Oh no. She is always sure she has told me everything. It's always because I forgot and I don't listen well!

Our house is not a big deal, I am the type of person that picks up every day and my wife is a deep cleaner once a week or so. If works out well.

My biggest issue is her car. Like I said I like to keep things organized. Every time I get out of my car, I bring whatever I brought into it with me. My wife collects crap. If we run out of clean cups in the house I just go to her car and collect the 15 dirty ones scattered about. I always insist we take my car whenever we go anywhere so I don't have to deal with digging out my seat.

The problem my wife and I have is that we both have the same damn flaws. Neither of us is very good at putting **** away... so you can imagine what our house tends to look like!

We do try and split up chores. One of my jobs is picking up the kitchen every night, doing the dishes. Her job is the easy part, just empty out the dishwasher. When she does it (which is maybe one-third of the times), she acts like she's just ****ing cured cancer or something. Cripes, the two times a year she actually puts *dirty* dishes in the dishwasher, look out!

What annoys me more than anything, though... I don't mind doing laundry, putting it in the washer, all of that. I *hate* folding laundry (as does she). So, we'll have big piles of clothes on the floor to get folded, and so I'll grab a beer and fold clothes while watching MNF or the Celtics or whatever (cripes, ain't I a domestic *****?). My **** gets hung right up, or in my dresser, I know where I want all my stuff. I'll fold a big ol' laundry basket of her stuff... just needs to get put away, I don't know how she keeps her clothes organized. And.... it sits there, folded, all oranized.... JUST NEEDING HER TO PUT THEM IN THE DAMN DRESSER... they just sit there for WEEKS.

Or, she'll spend all of this time folding the babe's clothes, and then not put them away. Please tell me how I'm supposed to find a onesie at the bottom of a laundry basket and not disturb all of the folded clothes on top? It ends up being that she just wasted her time folding all of those little tiny clothes that don't NEED to be kept all that neat anyway.

Cripes, I really do sound like a whiny little domesticated ***** here, don't I? Don't tell Paul or the boys, m'kay?