How drunk do you have to get....

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i would say at least a bottle of whiskey, in beer, mybe 20 pints?

i dno
 
I'll let you know if it ever happens. I've been told to stop trying to put our the fire because it's taking me WAY too long, but I always give it the old collage try!!
 
haha.. this thread is random and amusing...

ppl shouldnt worry bout it tho.. if your that pissed, chances are your fall to sleep or your missus will pass out from drinkin anyways :p
 
The fine print for the triathlon kinda bothers me:

I acknowledge that a triathlon (or any portion thereof) is an extreme test of a person's physical and mental limits and carries with it the potential for death, serious bodily injury, and/or property loss. By submitting this document, I HEREBY ASSUME ANY AND ALL RISKS ASSOCIATED WITH PARTICIPATING IN THE WHISKY DICK TRIATHLON. I certify that I am physically fit, have undergone sufficient training to be qualified for participation in this event, and have not been advised against participating by a medical professional.

Serious bodily injury? Loss of property (I guess if it causes a divorce)? Death?
Also.. how much training is necessary?
 
Never been so drunk he couldn't get in. But been so drunk he could't get the nozzle to spray. Makes it hard to put out a fire....
 
It is a rather annoying thing to happen, however, due to the level of intoxication you really aren't as bummed out as you should be. I have unfortunately had this happen several times, and how hot or homely the girl is does not matter. The only thing that works when this happens is a very good hummer. If she has skill it will work but it does take time and in my instances it takes a long time, 20 minutes or more to get Pinnochio at timber strength to be able to sustain penetration. Most times the girl gives up long before that happens.

One truth I have always heard and I will concur with, is that once it is in you are good to go. It has never gone flat before finishing the job once in!:cross: :cross: :cross:
 
ZenButcher said:
One truth I have always heard and I will concur with, is that once it is in you are good to go. It has never gone flat before finishing the job once in!:cross: :cross: :cross:

I'm going to have to disagree with that statement....

It actually works out pretty well for the lady involved, at least until chafing sets in!
 
You guys are cracking me UP!!! Been there, done that...but now in my infinite aged wisdom, I just wait until she passes out and don't even bother trying. But there's nothing like waking up at 0300 with a ragin' brew wood!!!
 
Must be genetics. If I was unable to, "get the fireman up", then Scottish peoples would have died out a long time ago.
Seriously (****, that is the second time tonight I said that! ..and I am still touch typing!) it takes a lot. I would be unconcious first. It has happened, so I am told. ...the unconsious bit - i don't remember the rest.
lets just say I don't drink whisky any more unless I am at home, alone. ...but I digress!:drunk:
 
I've been drunk enough to lose interest midway through, but only once too drunk to stand up when a lady entered the room.
 
The few times that I *have* had, um... issues... I've passed out, but woken up a couple hours later in an EXTREMELY amorous mood. It's like, everything was built up, then once the booze dropped below critical mass, it all came gushing to the surface, so to speak... I could easily get into "WAY TOO MUCH INFO" territory, but let's just say that SWMBO doesn't mind when I wake up like that... :D

What punk band was it that wrote "Too Drunk To F*ck"?

EDIT: Dead Kennedys, of course...
 
There have been a few times when I haven't even bothered trying, but when there is the will, there has always been the way. We use the expression TDTF. When we have been doing some serious drinking, one of us will ask the other, "TDTF?"

This is based on a great Dead Kennedy's song by the same name - they spell, er, sing it out. I saw then last year, but sadly, without Jello, it ws no Holiday Inn Cambodia
 
Proofman said:
Never been so drunk he couldn't get in. But been so drunk he could't get the nozzle to spray. Makes it hard to put out a fire....

LMAO, I don't even want to talk about my experience. Damn Jack. :drunk:
 
Ever try the Ambien Challenge?

Take an Ambien (or other strong sleeping med). Commence punching the clown. See if you can knock him down before you pass out.
 
I have a word file I use for saving names for tunes I may get round to writing.
One is called "The Paradox of the 30 Pint Woman".

:ban: ;)
 
I have never been too drunk to get the general to stand at attention. Can say that i havent been drunk enough to get it up though.
 
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