The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

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Big John is a ***** cat. I'm really not scared of him or his avatar. SWMBO, OTOH, is SWMBO. Prudence dictates being scared of her finding out I've been pinching Melana or her Avatar.

( I'm really not stupid, despite the vacant gaze on my puss, and I'm only half the D-bag I pretend to be. Which still makes me a D-bag of legendary proportion.)
 
So I had an interesting day yesterday. Brewed 45 gallons of pale ale in one batch using bog inns old 1.5 bbl brew pots and mash tun. My efficiency was crazy good at 84.4%. FW did a great design. That atleast helps overcome capes tendency toward crappy beer. image-190168026.jpg
 
paulthenurse said:
Good grief! Even at the rate you put it away its going to take a LONG time to drink 45 gallons of Blueberry Balls Beer.
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Actually neighbor and I did it and are giving kegs to neighbors. :) we are the nice neighbors. I can't make friends so I buy them off.
 
paulthenurse said:
How many pounds of blueberries go into 45 gallons of beer anyways? And where do you get fresh blueberries in November?
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According to Alice you have blue balls. And since you aren't using them, I figured you would onto miss them.
 
Am I the only one who notices that Yeager's grammar, spelling and punctuation all have a direct negative relationship with the time of night when he makes his posts? And the overall testosterone level has a positive relationship with that same time of day?

(Which was a highbrow way of saying, "There goes Chris, drunk-posting again.")

Chris, next time you get all feisty and testosterone fueled late at night you should shut off the computer and carry that swagger upstairs. See how far that gets you.
 
Melana said:
That's it! We are moving to your neighborhood
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Before you know it the entire cast of the MassHole thread will live in Norton. With the exception of me and AZ. I'm not moving there because I refuse to have sex with sheep. AZ won't because the sheep all signed a petition to keep him out.
 
paulthenurse said:
Before you know it the entire cast of the MassHole thread will live in Norton. With the exception of me and AZ. I'm not moving there because I refuse to have sex with sheep. AZ won't because the sheep all signed a petition to keep him out.
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I don't think the_bird will move this way... Too much competition for the sheep.
 
Cape, Yeager, Thunder Chicken, Melana and the Twerk from Dakota all in one town?

Obama to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff... "How long until that B52 arrives over that God forsaken blight on civilization?"

"It will be there in four minutes, Mr President."

" And you're sure they can take out every last man, woman and sheep living there?"

"100% sure, Mr President."

"And you're sure that you won't overshoot and hit Stoughton by mistake?"

"Yes Mr President, but as a precaution I've had PTN escorted to your personal bunker in DC for his safety."

"Oh that's a great idea! I hope he brought more of that Utopia clone. That is the best beer I've ever had."

"We asked him to Mr President, but he said no."

"Damn! Maybe next time... Ok, lets get this over with! Bombs away!"
 
paulthenurse said:
Cape, Yeager, Thunder Chicken, Melana and the Twerk from Dakota all in one town?

Obama to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff... "How long until that B52 arrives over that God forsaken blight on civilization?"

"It will be there in four minutes, Mr President."

" And you're sure they can take out every last man, woman and sheep living there?"

"100% sure, Mr President."

"And you're sure that you won't overshoot and hit Stoughton by mistake?"

"Yes Mr President, but as a precaution I've had PTN escorted to your personal bunker in DC for his safety."

"Oh that's a great idea! I hope he brought more of that Utopia clone. That is the best beer I've ever had."

"We asked him to Mr President, but he said no."

"Damn! Maybe next time... Ok, lets get this over with! Bombs away!"
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So Obama has to one up Cape on best way to fry a pig? Nuclear fission is unfair...
 
TheDudeLebowski said:
Hmmmm. Sitting in CBC having a Charles River Porter. Im suspecting a cease and desist order to someone in this thread very soon.
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We should have Yoop in here again to make sure all is above board....
 
I think Yoop pops in here from time to time, looks around, shakes her head in disbelief and decides to just leave us the hell alone, afraid we might infect the rest of the board with our Masshole-ocity if we emmigrate beyond the boundaries of this thread.

But just in case... No more sheep talk. Yeager, Cape, Flatualent, we all know what you do, we just shouldn't talk about it anymore.
 
paulthenurse said:
I think Yoop pops in here from time to time, looks around, shakes her head in disbelief and decides to just leave us the hell alone, afraid we might infect the rest of the board with our Masshole-ocity if we emmigrate beyond the boundaries of this thread.

But just in case... No more sheep talk. Yeager, Cape, Flatualent, we all know what you do, we just shouldn't talk about it anymore.
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Is it illegal?
 
I think that's what the bartender actually served me. They were changing the menus and he pointed to the Charles River Porter up on the board. He described it as a porter aged in Cedar casks. I'm looking online and they call it The Darkest Night Ale. Very tasty and well balanced. I never like brews where they go overboard to showcase a flavor.
 
Taxpayers buggering politicians? Never heard that happening. Now politicians screwing taxpayers in the bum, everyday of the week and twice on Sundays.

Edit: Reading is fundamental. And a city in MA. Oops...
 
revelation said:
Taxpayers buggering politicians? Never heard that happening. Now politicians screwing taxpayers in the bum, everyday of the week and twice on Sundays.
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Wow. Are you SURE you're from Cambridge? Talk like that will get you expelled.

revelation said:
Edit: Reading is fundamental. And a city in MA. Oops...
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Read the entire post first then pick the BEST answer...

PTN
 
You guys wonder why I'm cantankerous? Here is the going away cake my colleagues of 15 years gave me tonight. In case you don't have your glasses on it says "We'll miss you. Not!"


I'm heading over to the Stop and Shop bakery in the morning and I want to talk to the manager!!!!!!!!! NOW!!!!!!!

image-2016338471.jpg
 
Yakima 300

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