What would you do for a Chugger Pump?

Be post #2. Pose with a picture of it, and shake your hand if I meet you.

Trade my Klondike Bar.

Take my brewing to a whole new level. And send you a mixed case every 6 months for the next two years.

I would talk to it nicely and be sure to feed it hot wort at least once a month.

brew beer

I would trade in my mother-in-law for a chugger pump. I am sure that I would win on the deal.

Let you lay a finger on my Butterfinger...

Cheers!

["Oh no he di'int!" ]

Put a tooth under my pillow for the Chugger Fairy to pay me a visit?

for a stainless chugger pump?

its a moderated forum

It would just show up as stars if I typed it in.

I would yell yippie a thousand times (and brew beer with it of course)

tom

I would let my wife brew with me, and allow her to nag me as much as she wanted while we brew.

I would use it to create a zero calorie barley wine. I would incorporate it into my 110v 3bbl four-tier electric brewery. I would create wort so magical that fermentors never need be sanitized and starters never need be made. I would whirlpool so hard that the hops could be removed with tongs. I would chill so fast that Eisbock would emerge from my chiller.

shoggoth said:

I would use it to create a zero calorie barley wine. I would incorporate it into my 110v 3bbl four-tier electric brewery. I would create wort so magical that fermentors never need be sanitized and starters never need be made. I would whirlpool so hard that the hops could be removed with tongs. I would chill so fast that Eisbock would emerge from my chiller.

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+1

I was going to think of a clever response, but I gotta just vote for this guys. However I will take what he said, but call it my own. Different water bill different response

I would correct all the people who thought the question was "What would you do WITH a chugger pump".

Guys, the question is "What would you do FOR a chugger pump."

I would invite you to a brew party at my place where you could (see the chugger pump in action and) drink some great beer with me and my friends. Next month's party should be fun. My friend and his wife are adopting their third child and this dinner and party is going to be a way for people to hang out and maybe donate some money. Adopting is very expensive.

I promise to NOT show up to

5044 Industrial Road, Suite C
Farmingdale, NJ 07727

wearing a viking hat, screaming the most tone-deaf rendition of "Immigrant Song" By Led Zeppelin until your Jimmies are Thoroughly Rustled.

Also you will be welcomed into my home for our weekly brew night, yes we do this weekly, and there are ladies.

Not ban you. Again.

Kidding! Or am I?

Replace my "Brand X" pump! AND THEN BRAG ABOUT HOW FREEKEN KILLER A CHUGGER IS TO ALL MY CUSTOMERS WHILE SHOOTING A YOU TUBE VIDEO OF ME SMASHING "BRAND X" WITH A MY TRUCK!

(going for the win!)

Cheers
Jay

Blow up my old pump with a Mk.19 or possibly some C4.... Maybe some target practice for the mortars. Unfortunately wont be able to do that, pump is packed in storage and bringing back that kind of ordinace is frowned upon.

Use it as a back up for my other two chugger pumps.

Maybe use it to pump ice water through my plate chiller.

I would give you a couple cases of this shagnasty porter that is sooooooo good and then send ya a couple of bottles every so often just to keep you wanting more

Give it to a friend who is still gathering stuff for his system.

Bah. . That's what I'd do WITH a chugger pump.

What would I do FOR a chugger...

I don't know. Why do I always get the tough questions??

I would put a picture of me with my Chugger Pump on a Beer Forum, and tell the wolrd how great it is.

I would shave my head as well.

BrewThruYou said:

I would shave my head as well.

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I would also shave his head for one.

I already paid 154 bucks for one. What else do i need to do?

mikeysab said:

I already paid 154 bucks for one. What else do i need to do?

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Pay me $154 bucks so I can get one...

Just re-upped my hbt membership.....but i was SO going to do that for you.

For a free chugger pump I would create a mixture of bud, miller and coors. Then I would attempt to drink it at a high speed through my newly acquired chugger pump

^ That's a rookie mistake, and ya hate to see it happen...

Cheers!

Ok for a free chugger me and my wife would donate some time to a local charity helping to feed and clothe the homeless. Gotta pass along the karma.

I'd brew a batch of Chugger "Pump"kin Porter and send you a case!

mcbaumannerb said:

I'd brew a batch of Chugger "Pump"kin Porter and send you a case!

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Dude your Avatar kills!!! LOVE IT!

I'd stop considering using this and wondering how many thousands of gallons of photo processing chemicals had been pumped through it :

newtstampede said:

Blow up my old pump with a Mk.19 or possibly some C4.... Maybe some target practice for the mortars. Unfortunately wont be able to do that, pump is packed in storage and bringing back that kind of ordinace is frowned upon.

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Dayamn.. I'd give it to this guy. His pump is packed. Everyone's frowning at him. He knows where you live. He has mortars. (Trouble with mortars, is that ya really need a spotter so yas can walk it in, so yas gotta plan sheetlydat..).

Hell, sounds like he has at least 3 different ways to blow things up, and he hasn't even talked about his tattoos, or his hand gun collection. Ifeyewuzyou, I'd give him 2 pumps.

I don't want to write anything witty to try and influence the judge(s). If I did, you'd be sure to send me the pump, so as to avert the attention of Mr. Stampede from using you as target practice.

(Note to self: be sure to vote for candidates that continue to frown, and make it difficult to bring C-4 "back")

Your wife.

Oh, I didn't say it, but I guess that means I'd take a mortar, a C-4, or a Mk19, and Dayamn again, I did that before I knew WTF a Mk19 was. Dayammnn. For those of you not on the front line, here's the caption that goes with the picture of a mk19 from this site: http://www.americanspecialops.com/photos/special-forces/special-forces-mk19.php

"A Special Forces soldier with the 1st Special Forces Group mans a MK19 40mm grenade launcher mounted atop a Ground Mobility Vehicle (GMV). The MK-19 is belt-fed automatic grenade launcher with an effective range of 2km."

This guy needs a pump. Please, please give him a pump. I'm pretty sure he's just having a hard time expressing himself, and just used the guns and explosives as a metaphor. But if not, then this poor sucker is stranded on the front line, covered in desert dust, surrounded by explosives (which are obviously his friends), and depressed because he's going to have a hard time taking his "friends" home. He could probably even use the pump to help hose himself off.

Plus, I'd just as soon have Mr. Stampede keep thinking about either 1) you giving him a pump, where he thinks of you fondly, or 2) not giving him a pump, where he'd then be obsessed with you. You. That would be far better than having him think about me taking the pump from him with my charm, charisma, and keen insight. I withdraw my application because how could I possibly compete against the entire US Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, National Guard, CIA, FBI, DEA, Coast Guard, and even the TSA on the front lines, particularly when they have their own Mk19's (w/ 1 mile range)?

and not for nothing, but are the soldiers on the road practicing the Village People's YMCA? Or are they spelling BYO in code?